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David Poland

By David Poland poland@moviecitynews.com

News by the Numbers

10. Pam Anderson: The Sequel
There will be no Barb Wire 2, but Pam is out to prove her claim that she will never “simulate” sex onscreen again. Her next “love documentary” premiered Monday, co-starring Poison singer and recent first-time film director Bret Michaels.
9. Scream TV Works For The WB
Feature-turned-TV series, “Buffy The Vampire Slayer,” and “Dawson Creek,” an original from Scream scribe, Kevin Williamson, combined to score big Neilson numbers. Maybe UPN will counter with The Brady Bunch/Mission:Impossible hour. Wait a minute.
8. Sundance Keeps That Edge
Check out the festival’s award ceremony Saturday at Bloomingdales. Oops! You can’t. It’s by invitation only, co-sponsored by Entertainment Weekly and USSB. “Attention, shoppers! Ten percent off on ultimate hipness when you charge it on your Bloomies card!”
7. Spice Girls Invade Hollywood
Remember when they said they had Mad Cow disease under control and that it would never get to America? Liars! Meanwhile, Ginger Spice is an unwilling participant in a new video called Spice Exposed. Naked Girl Power!
6. Return to Oz
While Surrender Dorothy was in Park City winning honors at the Slamdance Film Festival, Drew Barrymore was signing up to make a movie of the same title for Warner Bros. Neither have a relation to the MGM classic. Possible tag line: “You’ve seen the T-shirt, now see the movie.”
5. Hefner Gives Wife Up, Award Out
Days after Hugh hit the town with two Playmates after separating from his wife , they’ll be giving out the Playboy Freedom Of Expression Award at Sundance. Do they mean expressions like “Til death do us part” or “My doctor can take you to a D-cup, no problem”?
4. Cattle Ranchers vs. Oprah Begins
She’s now suffering from Mad Cash Cow disease.
3. Whoopi Takes the Center Square
I’ll take “Actresses Whose Careers Are Deteriorating” to block!
2. All Conquer Love
Audiences catching the controversial documentary Kurt & Courtney explain why Ms. Love is pissed. Filmmaker Nick Broomfield basically accuses the widow of responsibility for the Nirvana star’s death. Now you wanna see it, don’t ya?
1. Extra Credit
Forni-gate overtakes the Titanic as top cocktail talk. I imagine that somewhere Pamela Lee is reading (tee-hee) about Jen Lewinsky‘s audio tapes and meowing, “Amateur.”

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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon