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David Poland

By David Poland

So Far…

Nothing I’ve seen in the Bewitched spots is as funny as the TV show was…

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18 Responses to “So Far…”

  1. jeremy says:

    I like the McKay additions, but Ephron has no idea how to direct his material.

  2. L&DB says:

    Im hoping Land wins this weekend. Due in large part to Herbie being insulting to the NASCAR NATION they want to sell it too. As well as Bewitched smelling like the second bomb Kidman has had in a Summer for the second Summer in a row. Bewitched does not even seem as funny as the Dick York era Bewitched.

  3. KamikazeCamel says:

    I actually think it’s looking better and better the more ads I see.
    And, hey, people like watching Will Ferrel fall over things!

  4. KamikazeCamel says:

    btw, Batman Begins is at $85mil by Tuesday. THat’s good, isn’t it?

  5. montreal kid says:

    I agree with Kamikaze. Bewitched does look very funny, the more ads I see. I highly doubt “Land Of The Dead” will top the box office. I wouldn’t be surprised if it places 5th. This movie has had piss poor promotion. Other than the TV spots – which are rare in themselves – print ads have scarce and I think I’ve only seen the trailer in theaters once.

  6. bicycle bob says:

    the show was funny. thats why its been in reruns for 40 years

  7. BluStealer says:

    I have some faith in Will. I’m trying to forget Kicking and Screaming ever happend. It never happend!

  8. Lota says:

    Lay down your weary head and cry L&DB, as parents have little else to see with their kids, Herbie will win.
    The hilarity of the Bewitched reruns beloved to most of us Gen Xers was the strength of the neurotic relatives and neighbors in the show–great supporting characters: Mrs Kravitz, Mr Kravitz, Dr Bombay, Endora (i think Shirly Maclaine could do a mighty endora if she gets enough time), “Serena”, Aunt Clara, Uncle Arthur and even the “straights” Larry&Louise. And of course the first Darrin, the perfect helpless & suffering mensch.
    If the supporting characters don’t have alot of charisma this movie will probably be dullsville, even if it is not a Redo of the show, people over 30 will still be expecting it to have the charm of the show. Failing to appease the 30+ audience would backfire too becasue who else will want to see this? I don’t really, I’ll be seeing the Dead first anyway.

  9. Arrested Fan says:

    I’m not digging it. I almost mustered up the courage to see Stepford Wives, but didn’t, and I won’t see this thing either. Why are Nicole’s projects always really good or really terrible?

  10. teambanzai says:

    Well my irrational fear of the undead will keep me from seeing land of the dead, although after reading the script I think it’s going to be a great film. I guess I’m going to see Bewitched, since I didn’t see Kicking and Screaming I haven’t been disapointed by a Will Ferrel film yet. And Herbie can just bite my crank. I love the fact that she had a diva moment at the premier when she found out her song was not actually in the film but put over the closing credits.

  11. Terence D says:

    Nicole Kidman just likes getting paid the big bucks. These are the roles for women that want to make the big bucks.

  12. Stella's Boy says:

    Doesn’t Kidman stick to the one for me and one for them rule? Or at least close to it. For every Bewitched or Stepford Wives, there’s a Birth or Dogville. I’m sure Fur is another one for her.

  13. jesse says:

    Yeah, Nicky Kids has been cultivating a nicely eclectic career, even if not everything she does is great. That’s cool, though — her career doesn’t have that overly cautious feeling of choosing roles solely on box office and/or Oscar potential (it seems like sometimes those are the two things actors are supposed to be thinking about all the time: will it make me a lot of money, and will it win me awards).
    I mean, even if Bewitched sucks, look at her resume for the past 6 years or so:
    Eyes Wide Shut
    Moulin Rouge
    The Others
    Birthday Girl
    The Hours
    The Human Stain
    Cold Mountain
    The Stepford Wives
    The Interpreter
    Genuinely eclectic, not just middlebrow crowd pleasers alternated with middlebrow awards bait. Looking at that list, the most common thread I can see in those roles is that, uh, she shows her ass a lot.
    The alleged plastic surgery/whatever makes me sad, though (even though she looks beautiful) (she’d probably look beautiful without it).

  14. LesterFreed says:

    The last good movie she was in was Days of Thunder.

  15. L&Db says:

    Lota, parents would probably keep their kids at home, then send them to Herbie. Secondly, if you are insulting the Land of the Dead marketing. You are not only insulting one of the better marketing teams on the planet. You also havent seen the flick, and know how great those ads are. Always remember: Shooting Big Daddy’s people. Will get Big Daddy mad. Finally, Kidman has a lot of garbage on that filmography. Days of Thunder being one of the highlights obviously.

  16. Lota says:

    I am going to see Dead first. Herbie will ‘win’ the deathrace to BO because as we speak millions of kids are saying “nothing else is on” “Ma it’s too hot outside” so what can Ma do but take them to the only flick they can get into. during Herbie poor Ma can drink out of the thermos hidden in her handbag and zone out for 2 h. Herbie will win.
    And ME insulting MARKETING? Since I see marketing as being next to the oldest oldest professions in the world like Snake oil miracle remedies, prostitution in it’s various forms and street preaching, I don’t insult it, I just try to avoid it entirely.

  17. Matt says:

    For what it’s worth, Wednesday’s numbers for Herbie were not pretty given that the target audience is theoretically underserved and out of school–2.7M/$819 PSA. That means it’s gonna be lucky to pull a 10M weekend, though it could go up to 13-15M if he’s lucky.
    Land of the Dead is a bit of a wildcard. The Dawn remake opened to 27M, but that was a pretty empty marketplace for “dark” films, while Batman is still strong.
    Bewitched will open at least as well as Stepford did with 21M, especially given that “chick flick” is a GAPING hole right now.
    My guess–
    #3–Land of the Dead–19M
    #4–M/M Smith–15M
    #5–Herbie, Partly Lohaned–11M

  18. KamikazeCamel says:

    Kidman has what Nathaniel from FilmExperience called “auteur lust” and I think if more actresses had this disease we’d be better off. How many other actors can say they have worked with:
    Lars Von Trier
    Wong Kar-Wai (coming up)
    Baz Luhrmann
    Gus Van Sant
    Stanley Kubrick
    Alejandro Amenabar
    Brian Glazer
    Stephen Daldry
    Sydney Pollack
    and not to mention Phillip Noyce earlier in her career.
    I think she is one of the bravest actors around today at least. Take 2004 for example. She went from a 3 hour minimalistic Lars Von Trier movie to a dark comedy remake of The Stepford Wives and then to a controversial Kubrick-esque movie about reincarnation.
    I’m sorta happy they haven’t just made the Bewitched movie a movie version of the television show. If you want to watch the television show you can – anytime you like. Plus, there’s been enough bad ones for to last a whole month of prime time viewing.
    I’d admire a risky failure than boring success.

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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon