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David Poland

By David Poland poland@moviecitynews.com

Swingin'! (Like From A Noose)

Spider-Man (3), Spider-Man (3),
Screws up just like a sequel can
He

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31 Responses to “Swingin'! (Like From A Noose)”

  1. Blackcloud says:

    The first two sucked, so there’s no reason the third should be different.

  2. MarkVH says:

    Dave, I love it when you actually write about movies. Especially when you take down the big guys like this.
    Sorry to hear it sucks this bad, though. I loved 2 like nobody’s business.
    And you still got some ‘splainin to do for Pirates 2. That I do not forgive.

  3. Lota says:

    Maybe you should say ***SPOILER*** Dave!

  4. Nicol D says:

    I’m actually a huge fan of the first two Spidermans and even liked elements of Superman Returns…yet I think I’m going through something of superhero fatigue now.
    After the first few episodes of Heroes, I had had enough of the whole “we’re all super heroes now” part of our culture. There is something almost perverse and juvenile with the way our culture is fixated on comic heroes at this time in our history.
    I will see Spiderman 3 but I can’t say I am terribly looking forward to it.
    I’m all superheroed out now.
    Also, based on what I’m reading, it does seem like this Spidey may have worn out its welcome. The whole disco scene people are writing about sounds awful.

  5. Tofu says:

    At last, at last! People are turning on Spider-Man! This first is surprisingly not too rewatchable, and the second was edited like a slug. The MASS appeal was a mystery to me.
    Too bad people are turning on the installment that, to me, is looking the best.

  6. jeffmcm says:

    So now it’s Musical City News.
    “There is something almost perverse and juvenile with the way our culture is fixated on comic heroes at this time in our history.”
    Juvenile, I can agree with, but it’s not like our culture has suddenly regressed into something when in the past people were fixated on cowboys, but perverse? From the guy who liked the gladiator movie a couple months ago?

  7. sky_capitan says:

    I watched “The Villains” bonus dvd from Spiderman 2.1 and I’ll see #3 for the villains alone.
    I can’t imagine it being that bad.
    Is it just Spiderman’s turn for a humiliating kick in the crotch?

  8. Nicol D says:

    “From the guy who liked the gladiator movie a couple months ago?”
    You mean ‘loved’ the gladiator movie.
    The thing is, cultures have always had heroes, be they cops, soldiers, spies, gladiators, cowboys etc. But the modern fixation on the average person with superpowers seems a little off to me. That we do not want to admit to our own mortality or frailties. It has become something of an obsession.
    Even Leonidas died in the end. Superheroes don’t die and when they do, they always come back. Yes I stand by my phrase that the modern fixation on comic heroes in particular (I am not talking Jason Bourne, James Bond, Jack Bauer type heroes)is both juvenile and perverse.
    Understand I like superheroes too…but I do not obsess on them. I think our culture now obsesses on them.

  9. jeffmcm says:

    People get annoyed by too much success, same reason Pirates will take a beating in a couple of weeks.

  10. Nicol D says:

    It’s not the success I am talking about…it’s the obsession. For me it hit when I saw Heroes and how pretentiously serious it took itself and how seriously fans took it. As though it was literary or insightful.
    I actually think Pirates will hold water and Spidey will fall.
    We will see.

  11. Me says:

    Jeff, I think only a certain sort of people get annoyed by too much success. I predict the only beating Pirates gets will be critical, not monetary.

  12. jeffmcm says:

    Yes, but that certain sort of people are ‘the media’ leading to mainstream acceptance of their views. I predict Pirates 3 (and maybe Spider-Man) will be akin to Matrix 3 – critically lambasted and lower-grossing than part 2, but still with enough momentum to be one of the year’s top grossers when all is said and done.

  13. Hopscotch says:

    the one thing wrong with that analogy jeffmcm is that Matrix 3 was “R”, therefore off limits to youngsters who gobble up Spidey, Pirates and Shrek.
    But I’m sure there’s going to be one high profile bomb this summer, and I honestly can’t figure it out.

  14. jeffmcm says:

    That’s true but I don’t see how it affects my analogy – I still think that all three of Spidey, Shrek, and Pirates will do quite well, just not as well as their predecessors (they’ll all do much better than Matrix Revolutions’ $139m, if that’s what you thought I was thinking).

  15. Wrecktum says:

    “But I’m sure there’s going to be one high profile bomb this summer, and I honestly can’t figure it out.”
    I’ll give you a hint: they’re more than meets the eye.

  16. Hallick says:

    “Got the effects right
    As they do every time”
    So basically, we’re getting the same Spider-Man shaped pencil eraser with moveable parts swinging through the city.

  17. Hopscotch says:

    You are correct Jeffmcm, I thought you were talking about that specific gross. And I do agree with your theory that the third one(s) will not be as big as its predecessors.
    Except for Bourne because by August will be so thirsty for a down-to-earth (so to speak, sans heavy CGI and autobots) action movie will be all dying to see it.

  18. The_Sun_Toucher says:

    Please don’t misunderstand the following comments Nicol D, I’m not trying to pick a fight. I very well may be misunderstanding you. If that is the case I apologize in advance.
    “Even Leonidas died in the end. Superheroes don’t die and when they do, they always come back. Yes I stand by my phrase that the modern fixation on comic heroes in particular (I am not talking Jason Bourne, James Bond, Jack Bauer type heroes)is both juvenile and perverse”
    The fact that Leonidas dies at the end of 300 doesn’t really make that film any more mature than the average comic book flick. Leonidas still comes off as every bit the “Superman” despite dying in the end. Death and violence in and of themselves do not automatically make a particular work more “Mature”.
    I also don’t see how heroes like James Bond or even Jack Bauer are any less “juvenile”. They may not have superpowers, but they definitely fit the description of a superhero. They aren’t really as different from their comic book counterparts as you make them seem. I fail to see how they belong in some seperate category. Bond especially has cheated and escaped from death plenty of times. His adventures pretty much play like a comic.
    “It’s not the success I am talking about…it’s the obsession. For me it hit when I saw Heroes and how pretentiously serious it took itself and how seriously fans took it. As though it was literary or insightful.”
    Comic fans are the only people I see truly “obsessing” over super heroes (I say that being a comic fan myself). Your problem seems to be more with us than with the culture at large. Superhero flicks are marketable (for now). Sooner or later, pop culture (and movie studios) will move on to something else. I really don’t think it’s as problematic as your trying to make it.
    I would argue that Most of the TV shows and movies the public tends to obsess over are no more literary or insightful than an episode of “Heroes”.

  19. The_Sun_Toucher says:

    Also (and sorry for the long rant) I’m not sure if the negative/so-so reviews are part of a backlash against the franchise, the character or superhero movies in general. It may just be that some people are dissapointed in this particular spider-man movie. Everything is not neccessarily part of some larger movement or mood change.
    Plus I would argue that a backlash has been biulding steadily for the past few years, judging by the critical reactions t0 F4, Ghostrider etc.

  20. Martin S says:

    Sun-Toucher, you’re right on. The superhero film is just a natural evolvement in visual effects filmmaking. The idea behind The Matrix, as explained by the Wac’s, was to create a place where superhero actions could take place, but not within the superhero construct. Once they showed what could be done and what people were willing to accept, the avalanche started. Every prior superhero project had tried to tamp down the fantasy aspect of the character.
    There’s also a generational aspect. The 18-34 target audience has grown up with continual Marvel or DC cartoons, massive toy lines, and were the first group to have a collection of superhero movies to rent. That did not exist in the 80’s or 90’s.

  21. jeffmcm says:

    The other reasons superheroes are big right now are because gun violence is out of fashion, thus reducing cops from the cultural equation, and because people like the fantasy of ‘uniqueness’ that comes with having superpowers, as opposed to being part of a homogenous force like cops/the military.

  22. The_Sun_Toucher says:

    “Sun-Toucher, you’re right on. The superhero film is just a natural evolvement in visual effects filmmaking. The idea behind The Matrix, as explained by the Wac’s, was to create a place where superhero actions could take place, but not within the superhero construct. Once they showed what could be done and what people were willing to accept, the avalanche started. Every prior superhero project had tried to tamp down the fantasy aspect of the character.
    There’s also a generational aspect. The 18-34 target audience has grown up with continual Marvel or DC cartoons, massive toy lines, and were the first group to have a collection of superhero movies to rent. That did not exist in the 80’s or 90’s.”
    Thats Some really decent insight , Martin S. Especially the stuff about the 18-34 year old target audience. The current media blitz of superhero related media is pretty much the norm for us, much more so than it was for previous generations.

  23. The_Sun_Toucher says:

    “The other reasons superheroes are big right now are because gun violence is out of fashion, thus reducing cops from the cultural equation, and because people like the fantasy of ‘uniqueness’ that comes with having superpowers, as opposed to being part of a homogenous force like cops/the military.”
    Hmmm…Interesting. Never really considered that end of it. I’ll have to give that one some thought.

  24. I loved Spiderman 2 (was my #3 of 2004 I think), but the dark tone isn’t really rubbing me the right way atm. I still can’t wait to see it though. I still think it’ll be good. But more on the level of Spiderman 1 and not 2.
    Oh, and also, Heroes is the best show on TV (apart from Veronica Mars, but is that even on anymore?) but if people are going to be discussing the second half of the season please put spoiler warnings up. Not all of us live in America.

  25. Cadavra says:

    VERONICA returns this week. Yay.
    HEROES’ appeal utterly eludes me. A glum, dreary show with characters who seem to wish they were anywhere else. Hard to believe this is from the same folks who do the immensely likable CROSSING JORDAN.

  26. jeffmcm says:

    Funny, I would have called Crossing Jordan the glummer and more dreary of the two. Heroes is a plot-driven show and it has likeable actors in it.

  27. Cadavra says:

    Not really. The characters in JORDAN have a genuine camaraderie, and the fairly light-hearted tone of the show, especially since season two, in the face of what is obviously a very dark kind of work (autopsies), is one of the key reasons I enjoy it. The actors in HEROES may be likable, but the characters certainly aren’t, except Hiro and Ando.

  28. jeffmcm says:

    I guess I find their light-heartedness dreary.

  29. Joe Leydon says:

    My favorite new show of the season — actually, my fave new show since House — is Raines. Unfortunately, the ratings have been lousy, and I suspect I saw the last episode Friday night.

  30. jeffmcm says:

    I suspect you are right, Joe. (I hope none of you are Black Donnellys fans either).

  31. Cadavra says:

    Yes, DONNELLYS was dreadful. (At least the first episode; couldn’t bear to watch another.) What with STUDIO 60, VERONICA, GILMORE and possibly JORDAN and CLOSE TO HOME headed for the scrapheap, I suspect I’ll have a lot more free time come this fall.

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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
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“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon