April 24, 2024
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BYOB: 235 Years Of Relative independence
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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?
So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.
And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.
There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.
I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.
So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.
But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”
My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher
“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.
~ David Simon
so…..well, yes…it is, indeed, thursday…..ummm….so, thursday……ummm… how ’bout that daniel day lewis doing a musical?…. any thoughts?…..
GET CRUNK, YEP YEP.
BRING YOUR OWN BEER!
SEVEN BEERS DOWN AND HALF A BOTTLE OF VODKA.
Watch Sayesha get the boot on AI, then got my ASS OWNED by THE BAD LIEUTENANT;
ABEL FERRARA OWNS YOUR ASS.
Hey, how come that JESSICA ALBA joint with AARON WACKHART hasn’t DROPPED in LA yet?
GOD (ROEPER) and PHILLIPS reviewed it, and apparently it’s out in ONE THEATER IN NYC. But it’s not out in LA, nor is it scheduled for this week.
IT HAS JESSICA ALBA IN IT.
ALBA OWNS EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE EVER. ALBA IS SUPERIOR. SHE OWNS YOU.
How can LOS ANGELES not book one theater with a NEW JESSICA ALBA MOVIE?????
MEET BILL? More like MEET ALBA OWNS YOUR ASS.
B O N E R.
BOOK THAT SHIT. Not like anything else opens this time of year.
Seriously, you RODS are all about the SUMMER BLOCKBUSTERS, but FACE THE FACTS, in SUMMER like two movies a week drop. By comparison, in April or September, there’s like SEVEN MOVIES EVERY WEEKEND WORTH SEEING if you’re awesome.
OWNAGE. GET OWNED. MAN IS THE FUCKING KING.
BE SUPERIOR.
There are men out there FUCKING MODELS and GETTING WORSHIPPED.
How does it feel to not be one of them?
YOU ARE NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER.
YOU KNOW I AM RIGHT.
LEX SPEAKS THE TRUTH.
Any of you big time producers, drop me a hook ON MYSPACE to sign this incredible talent.
I AM THE NEXT TILA TEQUILA, THE NEXT BIG THING.
Poland, you know agents and shit. DROP THE KNOWLEDGE ON HOW INCREDIBLY TALENTED, FUNNY AND GIFTED THE LEX IS. Maybe I’d even give you a cut, homeboy.
LEX FOR FAME.
SIGN ME.
ah, lex…get signed and give me a big fat overpaid job……
Scooterzz, movieman, Leydon, brack, IO, Petaluma, and that dude who likes Michael Mann all know what’s up, with christian and laz on deck to RECOGNIZE.
LEX OWNS THE WORLD, TOUR ’08.
Get on the bus, all motherfuckers.
Thanks to food reps, mainly the M&M rep, I’m going to see INDY IV on Tuesday. For free. Can’t complain about that. Sometimes working at a grocery store has its perks…like once a year.
There is no doubt. LEX OWNS HOLLYWOOD ’08.
ALL AGENTS READING THIS SHIT, GET ON MYSPACE AND HIT ME UP, SON.
Make another blog entry ALL ABOUT LEX, the STAR of HOT BLOG 08 and THE NEXT BIG THING.
TILA TEQUILA WHAT’S UP HOT-ASS?
I just threw up in my mouth a little.
lol kam, that made me splutter my white russian through my nose, all over the screen… i hope it comes off, kahlua is damn sticky (working late so i’m making like the duder).
7 beers and half a stoli… what are you, lex, a school girl?
I’m sure sticky substances being spluttered onto a computer screen is a common problem for several people who comment ’round these here parts.
😛
(sorry, that was a joke aimed at nobody. forgive my purile humour)
Anybody other than me find the re-design of the Hollywood Reporter website so kind of lame and non-intuitive that it’s only taken them a week to give up on it?
It’s David vs. David. Goliath is nowhere to be found.
Coming Summer ’09: LexG in THE OWNAGE. Co-starring Jessica Alba (hey, she did that Dane Cook movie, so it could happen). If they don’t make him cut for a PG-13, I’ll be there.
SJR: Yes, the HR site is ridiculous now. I’m still checking it out, but it’s very frustrating. What exactly was wrong with the old design. Oh wait – Hollywood hates “old.” I get it.
“How can LOS ANGELES not book one theater with a NEW JESSICA ALBA MOVIE?????”
Ummmm…maybe because she’s never opened a picture and never will?
LEX IS A PLAYBOY. SIGN HIM. GET ON THE HYPE.
Anyone here played grand Theft Auto IV? There’s a character in it named Brucie. I’d swear he was based on LexG
Hey David Poland: can we change this to the Lex thread and get a new non-Lex thread going?
Lex, I would truly be interested in seeing your MySpace page. I’m not an agent or anything, I’m just saying you should probably put a link up.
Jeff, have no doubt, I will just turn that one into the Lex Thread, too.
Know it.
Yeah, I know.
I hate you.
If it’s true that the Hollywood Elite reads this blog every day, then THE LEXMAN must be legend all across town.
I bet Poland has to sort through my fan e-mail every morning.
This could be like that scene in Goodfellas when that mobster pisses off Joe Pesci by saying “go get my shinebox!”
But with Lex, it’s “go dub me a VHS!”
And unlike Pesci, who would kill me for saying that, Lex will just go to his empty apartment and cry, and then later muster up some courage and spew more unfunny horseshit on internet message boards.
Ergo: Joe Pesci is cooler.
For the record, I just wanted to clarify that the only thing I’m “on deck to recognize”, is that, yes, Lex is still a jackass.
The Big Perm, insert 2 hours of Playstation 3 and a jerk-off to some fake-boobed porn starlet before that cry, and you’re probably right on the money.
These become Lex threads because y’all take the Lex bait, J-Mc.
so true, DP, so true. Hopefully they still take the Lex bait because it’s damn entertaining.
I think he’d do what he does regardless of the rest of us. Isn’t that what Woody Allen said about sex, it’s better with a partner but he’ll take what he can get?
Remember when that THX character took credit for the kinder, gentler, more insightful Lex? Those were the days….
Way to show him man.
This is some funny shit right here. Good lord. The brother cannot even do me that well, but he’s at least funny. Nevertheless Lexy: the Alba film is now available on DVD or will be soon. THAT’S RIGHT… ALBA DOES NOT OWN SHIT! SHE HAS A-LIST APPEARANCE, BUT C-LIST TALENT! OWN UP TO THAT SHIT, LEX! OWN UP TO THAT!
ALBA, BITCH.
Now I wish she’d just have that kid already so she can get busy ignoring and getting back in shape.
I like it that she’s in makeup commercials now. B O N E R. I get a tube of my own when they show that shit.
A L B A.
I messed up my own awesome comment.
I meant to say I want her to just have the kid so she can start ignoring “it.*
Seriously, why would anyone in SAG, especially a HOT WOMAN, *ever* want to have a kid?
AGENTS AND PRODUCERS KEEP TAKING NOTE, HITTING UP MY E-MAIL, IMs and MYSPACE. FIRST ONE TO GET ME A SAG GETS A 2-LITER OF FAYGO.
JUGGALO 4 LIFE.
OH, AND OFFERS OF GETTING ME INTO THE WGA ARE WELCOME TOO, BUT OUR MAIN GOAL HERE IS GETTING ME INTO THE SCREEN ACTORS GUILD.
LEX FOR SAG IN ’08. WE CAN DO THIS, PEOPLE.
Fuck, I’m considering even offering to STOP POSTING ON THE HOT BLOG if someone can legitimately get me into SAG.
That ought to motivate some of you.
Post on Craiglist and don’t be too picky about what others might ask in return, and you can get all the industry hookups you want.
Jackass.
And if any of you megawatt moguls really have the hookup, tell Olivia Thirlby or Kristen Stewart I said what’s up. I have a gift card to Outback Steakhouse if they’re down.
Hey, if Brian Griffin can make it in “show business”, then you can too.
I was involved in casting a few films that employed SAG actors, and I saw some of the auditions. There are some spectacuarily ugly and/or untalented actors in that organization. So terrible at acting, so devoid of any trace of charisma or charm or evern superficial looks, that you know within ten seconds of their audition there’s no hope for them, ever.
Knowing that they got into SAG and LexG can’t warms my heart a little.
Has anyone seen Margaret Cho’s I’m the One that I Want? Remember that bit where she talks about the midget movie producer who said he would produce her screenplay if she slept with him while pretending he was a baby? I am getting immense enjoyment out of imagining Lex in that very situation.
Name-checked in every post today.
Thanks for running up my prices, son.
LEXG: HOLLYWOOD’S HOTTEST NEW INTERNET PHENOMENON.
The only thing Big Perm ever cast was the time he stuck his dick in plaster. Zing.
Also, any cougars out there in charge of shit, THE LEXMAN is down.
Fuck you’re an asshole.
Words fail me.
That was stupid.
Funny, jeff, I rather like you.
LEXG FOR SAG, ’08.
GET ME A SAG CARD, HOMES.
(i was responding to the dick in plaster joke, although everything else seemingly applies)
My joke about taking actresses to Outback up above was very funny. I should’ve gotten more dap for that line. It always gets a laugh at the M Bar open mic.
INT. DAY. WHITE ROOM.
JEFFMCM, a douchebag, is working at his editing bay. A HOT CHICK enters.
HOT CHICK: Hi, are you awesome?
JEFF: No, I’m a douchebag.
HOT CHICK leaves.
INT. DAY.
LEXG is in his apartment DRINKING and LIFTING WEIGHTS. There is a KNOCK AT THE DOOR.
He opens it to find the HOT CHICK.
HOT CHICK: Hi, are you awesome?
LEXG: Yes.
HOT CHICK: Let’s do it.
THE END.
OWNED.
Thanks a lot for ruining the twist at the end of Shyamalan’s The Happening! I was looking forward to that one and there you go and spoil it.
Don’t you have any social decency?
:/
Oh, and isn’t drinking and lifting weights at the same time sort of counter productive? Christ, don’t you know anything
Poland Blog Awards (the PBAs)
++++Best entry in combat with LexG++++
*Oh I am nervous opening the envelope*
It’s THE BIG PERM!!!!
**thunderous applause**
LexG I am going to tell my SAG friends to Never EVER to let you in unless you STFU about yourself and start talking about movies and leave the word “own” out.
I think the best part about LexG is when he tries to nail someone with a cutting remark, all he does is give further proof of his lack of talent, and why he will never amount to anything, ever.
It’s simply BONERIFIC!!!
Also Lex, your own nervous laughter at open mic night as you’re flopping doesn’t count. You need to make the audience laugh too!
This shit is just hilarious. Anyone in here looking forward to Prince Caspian? Anyone?
What am I looking forward to this weekend? How the Garcia Girls Spent Their Summer, the expansion of Son of Ranbow, and the Sunday press screening of Indiana Jones. And, if I have time, a Houston Museum of Fine Arts screening of Last Year at Marienbad. Life is good.
Prince Caspian? Blegh. The first was bad enough.
Is it true though that reshoots and marketing have pushed it past Spider-Man 3 in terms of most expensive movie?
Hey, Kam: Is it true they’ve made another movie that covers the same real-life NZ story already brilliantly dramatized in Bad Blood (with the one and only Jack Thompson)?
I realized something funny about Lex earlier – they say that there’s no such thing as bad publicity as long as the spell your name right, and then I realized that for all the so-called attention Lex has managed to draw to himself, he still remains completely anonymous: all we know is that he’s a 35-year old pedophile with a coke habit who lives in Los Angeles and has done open mike stand-up.
Are there any Sheen/Estevez brothers we don’t know about? If not, I think that Lex clearly needs to unveil himself in order to reap all the benefits of his newfound notoriety.
Joe, I haven’t heard anything. Am off to work now but will check later.
The fucking M Bar? Are you kidding me? Lex, your talk is all Sunset Strip but your walk is simply strip mall.
Fountain and Vine’s perfect for you though, because there’s a daily AA meeting at the coffee shop around the corner for when you hit rock bottom.
Look at Jeff bringing out the SLANDER now. I shouldn’t even remotely reply to something that scumbag, false, and unconscionable, but wow. I’m sure your lefty political icons would be so proud.
By the way, dumb-ass, I don’t do drugs AT ALL (just alcohol), have *never* touched coke, and last time I checked, lusting after 27-YEAR-OLD Jessica Alba or 21-YEAR-OLD Olivia Thirlby, or even joking about buying Kristen Stewart a basket of fries, was considered fairly normal hetero behavior.
You have just posted blatant LIES, McTool. I’m sure Poland’s happy about that.
Then stop acting like a pedophile with a coke habit. Pretty easy.
Just to be absolutely clear, Lex: I really dislike you. I’m not jousting or having ‘fun’ or playing along with your little game. If you don’t like the byproducts of your thoroughly scummy behavior (I’m sure if Kristen Stewart read about how many times you’ve referred to her, before she turned 18, and your erect penis in the same sentence, she’d be charmed), then you should start acting like a non-scummy human being. You bring this shit on yourself.
I’m actually staggered at Lex’s boldness in making himself out to be some kind of victim of big bad me and subtly whining to DP to take care of him. Jesus.
Really, you should just say I’M SORRY and move on, and might wanna consider politely asking David to delete some of your gems from tonight.
Including that last one.
Hey, dumb-ass, I’m sort of asking him to take care of *you,* and unfortunately by extension *himself,* since you’re posting things ON HIS BLOG that are BLATANT LIES. Imagine this were a print newspaper and we weren’t anonymous, and you sent that shit in and he printed it as editor-in-chief. What do you think would happen?
What the f*&( are you talking about, you insane maniac? What kind of reaction do you really expect to your horrible, self-loathing, misogynistic rants that we’ve been enduring for months? A pat on the back? You don’t like to be perceived as a pedophile? Stop talking about wanting to have sex with Kristen Stewart!!! You don’t want to be mistaken for a coke fiend? Stop writing pages-long high-energy rants at 4 in the morning!
What do you really expect?
Oh, and you are still anonymous, you low-self-esteem-ridden coward.
Oh, and take a try at googling my mentions of K. Stewart on this site and see if it turns up *anything* like the juxtaposition McDouche just suggested.
I guess my point is, Lex, that _you_ are the one who owes me and everyone else on this blog a huge apology. Asking _me_ for one is preposterous.
McDOUCHE.
Lex, I took down Richard Nash, I took down Ian Sinclair, and I’m going to make you eat your words.
Whoo-hoo, you’re an excellent swift-boater.
Ironic that you seem to be an Obama man, when you seem to follow the supposed GOP M.O. to a “T.”
Now watch, Lex is going to turn out to be Ashton Kutcher and I’ve been punk-ed.
Jeff, how’s YOUR showbiz career going?
Made a lot of friends in LA?
Got a girlfriend?
Happy with your day job.
Maybe you’re a perfectly happy-go-lucky guy in real life, but I always kind of wonder if this INSANE overreaction to my relatively harmless posts doesn’t say WAY more about you than it does about me. Something about hitting too close to home.
Lex, you are not Obama. You’re an asshole asking, nay, demanding that somebody tear him up. Labelling yourself a victim of slander is a bigger lie than anything I’ve said about you, because everything I’ve said about you has been based on your own persona, real or otherwise.
By Jeff’s logic, if his neighbor plays the stereo too loud at 4am, it’s ok to write a letter to the LA Times accusing them of being a mass murderer.
Saying I have a “coke habit” was based on, what, exactly? Show me a post where I said that, you bitch-ass bitch.
GUESS WHAT, SON.
ONE OF MY *THREE* COLLEGE DEGREES IS IN JOURNALISM, SO YOU DON’T KNOW FUCKING SHIT ABOUT THIS SUBJECT. YOU JUST GOT OWNED, BITCH.
Re: your most recent post, I have the severe misfortune of being utterly intolerant of idiots. Stop with the performance art – or even better, actually be funny or clever for a change – or at the very least, reduce the ‘I have a boner and I hate my life’ portion by 75% – and I have no gripe with you.
LOOK AT JEFF BACKING DOWN BECAUSE HE JUST GOT OWNED.
Oh, fuck you. That was about your 2:06 post. Dont act like an asshole and I won’t treat you like an asshole, but that’ll be hard because obviously you are what you are.
2:12 AM:
WINNER BY TECHNICAL OWNING = LEX.
Ah, I think we’re good here.
You’ll be cheered to know that I’m seriously considering retiring from this board after this… The SAG CARD thing didn’t work out today, and all I got was more McHeadache, and, really, it’s just exhausting and unpleasant to deal with.
Jeff’s outsize reaction to my AWESOMENESS is so far beyond what even a toolbag vanilla nobody like BIG PERM (nice handle, bitch) musters, it’s just unsettling.
I can’t believe I just wasted two hours of precious drinking/sleeping time on that.
Honestly, Lex, this is a waste of Poland’s blog space. If you want to own me further, email me. I’m easy to find because I don’t hide my identity as others do despite craving attention and success to a pathological degree.
See, that’s what I thought: passive acceptance of Lex lets him think he can continue unabated, while pointing out how awful he is serves as a discouraging force, aided by the fact that he already knows that he’s being a huge jerk.
Dude, you got OWNED, fucking deal with it; Get some SLEEP or something, motherfucker. Aren’t there other people who actually did you wrong in real life that you can go google and stalk? Jesus.
Oh, and I’m still waiting for a retraction and apology of your SLANDEROUS LIES.
But enough for now. Ah, fuck it, maybe I’ll do you a huge favor and just quit this place.
I love how LexG is acting like a whiny bitch because his anonymous persona got slandered.
Oh noes, LEXG GOT SLANDERED EVEN THOUGH NO ONE KNOWS WHO HE IS!!! WHAT ABOUT HIS STERLING REPUTATION???
I, The Big Perm, have eaten over 148 babies over my lifetime, and I have no intention of stopping. See, who cares?
Hey guys, come and check out my stand up comedy debut tonight at Wal-Mart!
Oh Big Perm. Bless you! That one reply was funnier than anything LexG has written all week.
Lex, it surprises me that you made one of your anonymous personalities’ three college degrees a journalism one, considering nothing you have ever written eludes to the fact that you have a general understanding of how to actually write (although, as I and others have said, when you’re acting normal you seem perfectly enjoyable). And any self-respecting college graduate with a journalism degree would cringe at the thought of anybody writing the way you do.
I guess if you actually had something worth losing due to such awful slander you would have actually told us by now (like, say, you write for a prestigious mag/paper/etc?) considering your penchant for ego stroking propaganda. So I have no qualms in being confident assuming that you’re a nobody just like a lot of the rest of us here who actually want to discuss film and the like instead of having to deal with your childing silly booze-filled rants.
I know Dave says that he’s only like this because we indulge him, but LexG truly and utterly offends me. I consider myself a fairly intelligent and friendly guy, but Lex – when he’s in his rabid foaming at the mouth arm waving crazy mode – makes me truly angry and full of contempt. The only way I can cope is by indulging myself the frequent courtesy of expressing said anger.
And considering he obviously loves the attention it seems to work both ways.
Truly and utterly offends? HE’S BLACK TEXT ON A SCREEN! He’s black text that you do not have to read, you can easily ignore, and move on to another topic. If he truly and utterly offends you, that’s on you. Scroll by his postings. It’s not like you have to sit there and read everything his post.
I don’t really get the Lex hate. You don’t like his comedy — Don’t laugh. I run hot and cold on him, depending on my mood, but he’s clearly doing shtick. We’re under no obligation to be amused, but the blog format should be able to accommodate Lex’s wacky digressions, especially if the haters don’t feed the beast. By now we know what he is. Do people still complain about Don Rickles’ “racism?”
Kam, I don’t think Lex’s “persona” needs to be held to journalistic standards any more than the rest of us, but his writing does fit his “character’s” voice, like it or not. IMO, of course.
I have to. It’s a sickness. I need help.
Don Rickles is funny and doesn’t pollute my mind.
Sorry to everyone for stirring him up yesterday, but I do think it’s hilarious what he gets offended at.
Jeffmcm’s personna is someone who hates Lex and calls him a pedophile. If Lex doesn’t think that’s funny, he doesn’t need to laugh either!
I just realized that there’s another Saw movie coming out… Ouch.
They’re going to keep making them annually until they stop making money. Then they’ll make a couple for direct to video, because even then, they’ll still make money.
Can J-Mc and Lex dance elsewhere? Please.
It really is a bore already. And as antagonistic as some of the political posts have gotten, the level of civility has been pretty good lately… except for this junk.
Like I said, sorry for stirring him up…yesterday.
Perhaps a phone call is in order.