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David Poland

By David Poland

If It's Tuesday, It Must Be Boring… BYOB

Oy… did the soft fall off the Indy waterfall ever leave us all floating in the water, waiting for a wave.
Even the cover of Movie City News is stuck linking to retreads of stories, from Patrick Goldstein’s lightweight review of woman in the film business that Manohla Dargis did weeks ago and that I am many others responded to in some depth, to the NY Times still giving the brilliant Errol Morris space to sell his not-quite-as brilliant movie Standard Operating Procedure with what seems to be his fourth op-ed piece the subject, to both the coastal Timeses doing “real people” stories meant to reflect the state of the industry (funding/acting), to Gillian Anderson talking X-Files and Joan Collins talking Bond (I thought it more likely she’d be offered a role in the new Mummy movie).
Maybe there is a good reason to go to Cannes… because it’s boooring around these parts.

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33 Responses to “If It's Tuesday, It Must Be Boring… BYOB”

  1. The Pope says:

    I think you should just jump on a plane and catch the last rays and reels of the festival. I’ve never been convinced of your arguments about Cannes.

  2. LYT says:

    The general public hasn’t seen Indy yet. Once they have, I expect the conversations to start up again.
    We could always talk about Uwe Boll…

  3. David Poland says:

    Heading up to Seattle on Thursday for opening night and for a Sunday sitdown with festival honoree Sir Ben Kingsley.
    I think I’ll survive.

  4. LexG says:


  5. T. Holly says:

    Dave, why did your Indy review go over like a fart in church?

  6. doug r says:

    We were in Portland over the weekend. Wondered why all the F***ing traffic on the 205 on a Sunday. Turns out 75,000 people showed up for the Barack Obama rally. Wow.
    Also saw the new Narnia movie at the Regal Bridgeport. Little dark and grainy, even with the DLP. Overall, better than I feared. Wow those kids can sure f**k up an attack. Focus, kids.

  7. David Poland says:

    Don’t know, T Holly. If I spent much of my time worrying about how people respond to my work, I wouldn’t be doing my work.
    Do you want to offer a theory – of course, assuming that your pejorative is in any way accurate – about the lack of response to the review?
    Since you asked, my guess is that the quiet is, as Luke suggests, about people not having seen the film, therefore not having any way to response… combined with a bit of “first response” burnout and a review that is generally mushy and neither easy to be thrilled about or attack angrily.
    But I’m sure you’ll find a way…

  8. But I destinctly remember you getting attacked left and right for your Superman review when people hadn’t seen it.
    Or am I imagining that?

  9. LexG says:

    Brooke White is the winner in Lexylvania, but I think the Mormon nerd will win, then go on to Taylor-level sales figures, while Cook thrives as Daughtry II.

  10. scooterzz says:

    lex — archadorable wins (and his cd sales will be HUGE) but it’s cooks cd we buy first……..
    jus’ guessin’……

  11. christian says:

    LexG, you just called out people here for not having a dick and you’re drooling over that vanilla ice cream pablum AMERICAN IDOL? You little girl!

  12. LexG says:

    I’m not drooling over anything, I’m asking a fairly simple question about THE MOST WATCHED SHOW IN AMERICA, a show that commands the nation at large’s attention in a truly galvanizing way. Considering more Americans vote for this than president, and would seem to follow it more closely than just about ANYthing in the news, domestic or global, it seemed a reason query on the eve of this year’s finale.
    Essentially it’s the biggest story in America today and tomorrow, and this IS sort of an entertainment site. I know film people love to be snobby and dismissive about reality TV in particular, but this show is undeniably huge, colossal news.

  13. scooterzz says:

    whoa, christian —— i have over seven thousand songs on my ipod and both cook and archeleta have acquitted themselves enough to hit that list…..
    as someone who has carved a place on the interwebs as a fan of what is arguably one of the worst movies EVER MADE, you might want to temper your pop culture comments……

  14. scooterzz says:

    since we’re doing an open-thread….. has anyone else here seen the cbs ‘swingtown’ pilot?…… i’m thinking there is going to be major shit hitting the fan…….

  15. LexG says:

    scooterzz, I’ve only seen the incessant ads, and I can’t imagine a bigger mismatch of content and network… I’m sure it’s a summer burn-off anyway, but those brown-hued, grainy, Ice Storm-meets-Boogie Nights clips would certainly seem to clash with the Procedural TV.
    Might’ve thrived on a pay channel, though.

  16. scooterzz says:

    lex– exactly….it is sooooooo wrong….and the idea of cbs trying to do ‘cable’ on network is laughable……
    i dunno….it’ll be interesting to hear what they have to say at tca in july…….(the show really is pretty graphic)….

  17. LexG says:

    I seem to get the feeling that some think I’m somewhat sexist or something.
    I’m the rare MAN– fuck, the rare AMERICAN CITIZEN– who will go to see a movie based on the FEMALE ACTRESS.
    While everyone in HTOWN acts all put out that THERE AREN’T MORE STRONG ROLES FOR WOMEN, guess what? Usually not even women go to see that shit en masse.
    Alba, Watts, Witherspoon, Theron, Biel, Ricci– My 10 BUCKS IS DOWN, SON, totally sold by their STAR POWER.
    Of course you have to be HOT to get the FRANKLINZ, ladiez, but THE FACT STANDS:
    I DO go to see movies because of the female lead, most guys don’t. Most women don’t.
    After you folks get me into SAG, you might wanna campaign for LEXG to get NOW’S MAN OF THE YEAR.
    YEP YEP.
    KNOW IT.

  18. LexG says:


  19. Lex, the only think you support about a “strong lady” is her tits. The objectification of women was hardly one of the feminist movement’s main goals.
    Germaine Greer would be so proud!

  20. not sure why I wrote “lady”. I’m listening to Princess Superstar right now, maybe her genteel nature brought it out of me.

  21. hcat says:

    I almost never return a movie to netflix without watching the whole thing but after a week of attempts I could not get through Youth without Youth. Anyone been able to get through that movie?

  22. T. Holly says:

    Dave, I’m just gonna say you should have opened with your coda, but like I said, “the director as fixer” is a germ of a prize; fasten your seatbelts, it’s gonna be a bumpy year.

  23. yancyskancy says:

    My ten bucks is always down for Sandra Bullock, though it has nothing to do with THE HOTNESS. I just like her. I even ponied up for crap like Two Weeks Notice and Premonition.
    In the 80s-early 90s, I would at least rent anything with Rae Dawn Chong.

  24. jeffmcm says:

    Hcat, I both saw and enjoyed Youth Without Youth, but it’s definitely an impenetrable something-or-other, not really a movie as it is a piece of staged performance art about movies (and reincarnation and philosophy and the color red). It’ll probably turn out to be the equivalent of Coppola clearing his throat before he plunges into something else. But in spite of its incoherence, I thought it was worth watching for the music, cinematography, and Alexandra Maria Lara.
    Hey Lex, if you want to ‘ask a fairly simple question’ maybe you should do it in a way that doesn’t repulse and annoy everybody. Or just stop the goddamn schtick (which I don’t think is schtick anyway – like Superman, I think the normal ‘human’ side is the secret identity and the outrageous maniac is the real guy).

  25. LexG says:

    Whoa, Renny Harlin movies officially go Direct to Video now? Among next week’s new DVD releases is something called CLEANER, starring the decidedly not-DTV lineup of Samuel Jackson, Ed Harris and Eva Mendes and directed by His Finnishness.
    Harlin is a favorite critical whipping boy now, but not too long ago – even at the time of DRIVEN – he wasn’t just A-list, he was one of the rare directorial STARS, a visible filmmaker who’d actually show up on late-night talk shows to plug his movies. He had a hot-shot vibe and a cool backstory and a distinctive “look” that put him out front as an amusing showman, when there are so many more successful and acclaimed directors we couldn’t pick out of a police lineup.
    Of course none of those things have anything to do with choosing the right material or the pitfalls of the business, just thought it was unfortunate. I always liked his rough, grubby, snowy, blunt way with action, particularly when set against rough elements.

  26. christian says:

    Scooterz, the difference is I can appreciate the bad as well as the good. I’ve never heard one interesting note from the IDOL gong-show.
    “Considering more Americans vote for this than president, and would seem to follow it more closely than just about ANYthing in the news, domestic or global, it seemed a reason query on the eve of this year’s finale.”
    Reason enough for me to despair.

  27. You guys see that new Netflix direct-TV cable box thingy?? It’s $100 to get initially then, if you pay more than the $8 rental fee thing per month, you get access on-demand to 10,000 of their movies. Damn….pretty sweet but more bad news for movie theaters.
    And re; SWINGTOWN…
    Totally agree it’s pointless to have it on CBS but

  28. christian says:

    What hath LexG wrought?

  29. Stella's Boy says:

    Nice Don. I am also a Molly Parker fan. Love her in Wonderland and Deadwood.

  30. I always dug Molly Parker but when I heard she named her son “Strummer,” I fell in love permanently. That is assuming she named the kid after the recently (then) deceased Joe Strummer. I do wish she’d shave those pits though. Man, I’m really channeling Lex today.

  31. LexG says:

    Molly Parker OWNED in Center of the World. If it weren’t for her awesomeness, Sarsgaard’s performance, and Mauro Fiore’s cinematography, that movie would’ve been a total loss.

  32. T. Holly says:

    Che, “full review coming soon.” Any live blogging?

  33. Considering all Center of the World had was Parker, Sarsgaard and a camera, you just encapsulated the whole thing. Not really much to that movie, even though it was passably interesting.
    And I can’t tell you about America, but I’m pretty sure Renny Harlin’s last few movies have all done direct-to-DVD down here, except for that Exorcist prequel. Although it should’ve.

Quote Unquotesee all »

It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon