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David Poland

By David Poland poland@moviecitynews.com

Ouchie!!!

Ella Taylor is taking heat for shredding, accurately, Sex & The City– Episodes 127-133: The Cash Grab.
Less a movie than a very long goodbye (again), at 142 minutes, Sex and the City is basically a whole season

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18 Responses to “Ouchie!!!”

  1. “The Cash Grab”? Really? A hollywood movie being about profits? WHY NEVER!?!

  2. Rothchild says:

    Iron Man is an extremely solid film setting up a brilliant sequel. Indy is dogshit. 3 out of 10 material. How do you lump them together in the mediocre category?

  3. Jerry Colvin says:

    Of course Ebert likes The Fall. He showed it at Ebertfest in April.

  4. Jimmy the Gent says:

    Anyone notice when Poland doesn’t like a movie he links to nearly every major negeative review? (He even links to critics who don’t matter. Rex Reed?)
    I didn’t see him linking to every negative review of Speed Racer a couple of weeks ago. (For the record: I love Speed Racer.)
    I know Poland will bristle at the suggestion, but the hostility he and other critics are showing SATC is nothing but pure sexism.
    Just look at his “official” review of the movie. Forget for a moment your feelings about the movie and that review reveals itself to be shallow, smug, and sexist all at once. Nobody would take that review seriously if it was for any other movie. (The comment of he being the only straight man at the screening is typical of the kind consideration this movie is getting from people whose job is to seriously consider a movie’s strengths and weaknesses.)
    I know Poland will come up with examples where he’s been “fair,” but the fact is his coverage of this movie is typical of most of the media. It’s as if critics were waiting for any excuse to lash out at this movie. I mean, people are using the runtime as proof positive that the movie is no good before even seeing it.

  5. Direwolf says:

    I just returned from a trip to Brussels, Amsterdam, and Bruge. The street furniture advertising for SATC is intense. But in Paris, it is almost over the top. Everywhere. Of course, fans will know the last season took place mostly in Paris. Our free walking tour guide even mentioned several events from the last season and pointed out where they took place.

  6. Direwolf says:

    On a completely separate topci, street furniture billboards for Indy 4 were also everywhere in Brussels, Amsterdam, and Paris.
    My son and I went to see it in Amsterdam at a 20 screen megaplex operated by Pathe. Having never been to a theatre in Europe before I found the experience interesting. First, there was a large comfortable waiting area with booths and tables and cushy chairs near the main floor concession which was below the theatre level. Second, it cost 9 Euro, steep for an American used to $10 prices in Chicago. Third, the candy we bought was much greater volume for the money than in the US. Fourth, the film was subtitled in Dutch but we noticed most of the Dutch sitting near us to be following along in English. Finally, in what we interpreted as the socialistic nature of Europe relative to the US, form very early on int he seating period, several theatre employees were forcing everyone to give up their cushion seats and push toward the center. The film ended up close to sold out. I’d say 90% full. SO this served a purpose but very strange that employees would control this rather than ticket buyers just working it out.
    As for my review, I found it enjoyable but not that great. Certainly not a waste of money but really provided no spark of freshness. Harmless. I think it will fall off quickly after this weekend but that won’t stop it from being near $300 million and a success. Unfortunately it appears to have gotten us Beverly Hills Cop 4!

  7. jeffmcm says:

    Indy 4 is a better film than Iron Man. Iron Man is probably a better movie, though.

  8. christian says:

    Seeing SATC in Amsterdam would be perfect because I’d have to be stoned out of my gourd on Yellow Taxi to sit through it.

  9. Rothchild says:

    Indy 4 is the sloppiest movie Spielberg has ever made and the plot never begins to make sense. The characters are terrible and their motivations are never defined. Almost nothing in the movie works. It’s very bad when the only defense possible for the movie is, “Well, at least Indy was in it.” The Lost World is actually a better movie in many ways. That’s very sad. So, I have to ask, how is it a better film?

  10. jeffmcm says:

    A lot of it depends on your viewing criteria. You could read Armond White’s review but it’s full of a lot of his usual bluster and nonsense, so I’ll offer this instead:
    http://www.thehousenextdooronline.com/2008/05/migration-and-exodus-indiana-jones-and.html

  11. Rothchild says:

    Wow. That was pretentious and long. He also analyzed several shots and scenes that no one ever intended to have any deep thematic resonance…
    …but I actually found that very interesting. As a filmmaker, I want to run and hide everytime someone tries to subscribe profound meaning to something that was just meant to be fun, but I’m actually starting to rethink some of the sequences in the film.
    I still think the film doesn’t work and is a huge misfire, but his bit about “the nuclear family laid literally, brutally to waste” and a few other portions were fascinating. I never planned on watching the movie again, but I may rent the Bluray some afternoon and view the film with some of these ideas in mind.
    It won’t change Karen Allen’s performance, 90% of the dialogue, the fact that the whole movie is basically shot on a soundstage, and the nonsense plot, but thanks for putting up that link. That’s some cool stuff.

  12. jeffmcm says:

    That’s why I said it has problems as a ‘movie’.

  13. Rothchild says:

    The thing I hate about the internet is that no one ever admits when they were wrong, so I’d just like to say…maybe I was wrong.

  14. LexG says:

    I liked it.

  15. jeffmcm says:

    I want to add that too often on the internet there’s this dichotomy between “It was awesome” and “It sucked” when the vast majority of movies are just mediocre.

  16. IOIOIOI says:

    If you are not down with KOTCS. Well, my name is Paul, and that’s bullshit Y’ALL!

  17. THX5334 says:

    Monday Morning Quaterbcking: Or, What I wanted to see/would have done if I was in charge of KOCS…
    (I know this is a little AICN, but I feel that with just a couple of revisions, this movie could have gone from better than last Crusade & the prequals, to 2nd best Indiana Jones movie)
    SPOILERS…………SPOILERS……………SPOILERS
    1. The area 51 sequence….
    Big fucking wasted opportunity. Rather than just a small cutaway to the Ark of the Covenant….Indy should have USED THE ARK!!
    He is fighting along, discovers the ark in the broken crate, tells Mac to shut his eyes, lifts the lid & BOOM! All the ghosts come out & just melt all the Russians except Cate who quickly sees whats up, & shuts her eyes, only to learn she can fight blind/eyes closed as she makes her escape. (The way it is now, just creates a big plot hole. all they had to do was search the warehouse a little, found the Ark, and there you go. Commies take over the world)
    That sequence would’ve made me feel Ive got my money’s worth there.
    Then I’d have him use the Rocket Train to escape the nuclear blast rather than the far fetched fridge.
    2. When Indy is staring into the crystal skull. That should have been the mindscreen that SHOWS Indy talking with the aliens. See them tell him to return it, & most importantly show their backstory. Show an awesome visual montage of Indy metaphysically travelling the cosmos with the Aliens as they explain their story. Use the backstory to raise the stakes of the main one. Something as easy as: If the interdemensional beings dont return home, it will cause some cosmic imbalance & the universe will implode.
    Bottom line, they should have used that scene as a mindscreen to tell the alien
    backstory & set the stakes.
    3. Cut the jungle swinging sequence & the crotch hits
    4. Mac shouldve stayed a double agent. the 3rd time was too much & him in his frantic greed didnt make sense for the character & was a blatant & not needed throwback to Last Crusade
    5. Have Indy actively involved in the climax instead of observing it.
    6. If you’re going to shoot it on sets, fucking light it so it doesnt look like a set.
    I feel those six changes would have put the film right up there with the best, instead of a better than average summer flick.
    There’s lots of other problems, but these were the major ones for me that kept it from being a classic
    Thanks for the indulgence, I had to get that off my chest to people that get film.

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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon