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David Poland

By David Poland

BYOB 11709

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162 Responses to “BYOB 11709”

  1. a_loco says:

    So I was at the Bloor Cinema in Toronto on Thursday (if you don’t know about this place, come next TIFF) to see the original My Bloody Valentine with a Q & A with the director and everything. It was packed, and accoriding to my friend that works there, even Edgar Wright (who’s filming Scott Pilgrim in T.O.) was in attendance. And then there was a power outage right before the movie began and we couldn’t see it. Those fuckers.

  2. mutinyco says:

    I’m watching The Stranger on Hulu, and I’ve decided the best actor who ever could’ve played Nixon in a movie is Edward G. Robinson.

  3. Joe Leydon says:

    Lane Smith was a pretty damn good Nixon in the TV-movie version of The Final Days — which, alas, I don’t think is available on DVD.

  4. doug r says:

    I think Richard Nixon was playing Edward G. Robinson.

  5. Hallick says:

    Dammit. First Patrick McGoohan, and now John Mortimer (Rumpole of the Bailey) has passed away. My birthday was difficult enough without having to lose two of my television heroes around the same time. Thank god for the DVDs.

  6. leahnz says:

    harsh vibes around the hot blog lately.
    hopefully everyone can mellow out like this dude:

  7. leahnz says:

    happy birthday, hallick

  8. jeffmcm says:

    Check out that Paul Blart gross – who knew?

  9. christian says:

    Good call, leahnz. What a great movie.

  10. Geoff says:

    What, no comment about box office and hardly any mention of it? This MLK weekend actually did significantly more than last Thanksgiving and Memorial Day – that is just freaky!
    Gran Turino is heading to well over $100 million and Slumdog Millionaire could actually crack that, too. I have to think that Frost/Nixon and Milk are just about dead in the water for grosses.
    And is it me or does it seems like all of the big Christmas movies are quickly fading? None of them are likely to crack $150 million at this point. And the highest grossing film for the holidays looks to be……Twilight at about $185 million. Just bizarre.

  11. Hallick says:

    Awww…thank you, leahnz.

  12. Hallick says:

    And thanks for the YouTube link too. How long’s it been since Penn did a job for the sheer fun of it like that? Sweet and Lowdown?

  13. movieman says:

    Tres bizarrre indeed, Geoff.
    I blame the ridiculous glut of ’09 product already filtering into theaters to take up valuable real estate–and bump some of the hardiest holiday hitters (“Marley and Me,” “Bedtime Stories,” “Valkyrie,” “Yes Man,” etc.) off multiple, dual and even single screens.
    A few years ago something like “M&M” could have lingered in first run release until March, and grossed between $270-$300 million.
    Now the studios only care about their almighty opening weekend numbers: “legs” are for the sell-through dvd market.
    The situation has been percolating for quite some time now, but this holiday season really took things to beyond-absurd extremes. Why not just eliminate the theatrical market entirely? (That day is coming, folks–and a lot faster than digital projection in every nook and cranny of America’s heartland which is sheer fairy tale–trust me.)
    And thanks for that delicious blast from the past, Leahnz: I’d almost forgotten the sheer joy that was Penn’s “Ridgemont High” performance.

  14. mutinyco says:

    I’m now watching Last Tango In Paris on Hulu. Sponsored by State Farm…

  15. Joe Leydon says:

    I wonder why Hulu took down Richard Fleischer’s Che! after having it available several months last year?

  16. Geoff says:

    Movieman, you make some very good points – this holiday season, the frontloading phenomenon went full-bore. You had three films opening to almost $70 million and only one of them could crack $180 million.
    Still, just some stuff you could not predict: a film starring Kevin James actually has a much bigger opening than films starring Jim Carrey and Will Smith just a month ago? A movie starring a dog out-opens Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise? It almost seems like you could switch this month’s grosses with last month’s grosses and it would make much more sense.
    It really looks like January could actually out-gross the previous December – has that ever happened before?
    Oh and by the way, Dave – sorry, but you were off about Gran Turino, Warners timed it perfectly. That film could be heading towards $150 million – the word of mouth is strong and if it actually gets some nominations, look out.
    That said, I was wrong about Searchlight and Slumdog – if they had gone wide last month, like I thought a good idea, it might have done in the holiday glut. The film actually shot up 50% this weekend on Golden Globe wins – it’s got over $40 million and has not gone over 600 screens yet. Is this is the same trajectory as films like Million Dollar Baby or Brokeback, or this film taking off higher?

  17. Joe Leydon says:

    OK, I know it’s a cliche — during tough economic times, people flock to moviehouses for escape — but I wonder if we’re now seeing just how much truth there is in that cliche. Indeed, I wonder if we’re in for a sustained period of big, big, BIG box-office grosses, as people find they can no longer afford tickets to sporting events and concerts, can’t even afford too many visits to nice restaurants, but can still buy tickets to megaplexes.

  18. doug r says:

    Well, my wife and I saw Chandni Chowk to China this afternoon. Wow. Bollywood musical numbers and Kung Fu fighting. Plus Deepika Padukone….Meow Meow:

  19. mutinyco says:

    They got rid of Che so they could add Ed Gein: The Butcher of Plainfield…

  20. leahnz says:

    yeah, i wish sean penn would do a flat-out comedy again, his superb comedic timing would appear to be going to waste! perhaps a petition is in order (the heading: dear sean, why so serious?)
    sean joins robert d jr and val kilmer in a reprisal of their roles as harry and perry in a new sex-and-drugs-mystery/comedy-caper… now that’s a sequel i could get on board

  21. jeffmcm says:

    Leah, you’re a delightful person, and I appreciate that when everyone else here is acting all alpha-male and know-it-all (myself not excluded), that you hang in there and put up with us all. Thanks and if you were in LA I’d buy you a drink or 12.

  22. leahnz says:

    aw thanks jeff…and i’d drink ’em, too! i can be as big an annoying know-it-all as the next person here – i have no illusions about that – so we all put up with each other from time to time. but i’m actually really fond of you all so i hate it when things get nasty, this blog has so many strong, varied personalities conflict is probably inevitable, but hopefully when things cross the line it’s never too late to take a step back and shrug it off, forgive and forget and all that (i know, easier said than done! if only life were that simple. but hey, if the hot blog can’t sort its shit out, what chance does the world stand?)
    sorry, that was all a bit sappy but i’ve been out in the sun all day again and i’ve gone barmy)

  23. LexG says:

    Apparently some of you haven’t seen Sean Penn hammily buffooning it up WITH a manic, chatty, scarily underweight 1997 Downey Jr. in Downey Sr.’s HUGO POOL.
    It’s a pretty bad movie but worth seeing for connoisseurs of Milanownage (as in Alyssa.)

  24. sloanish says:

    Leah IS a delight.
    Anyone know what that atrocious ending of Brooklyn’s Finest is? I imagine he just kills the bad guys off in a grizzly way a la Training Day, but there has to be more for people to give a shit.

  25. Spoilers obviously…
    The problem I had with Training Day, as well as American History X, is that the lead character is murdered as a direct result of events that occurred either right at the start of the movie, or before the movie even began. Thus, said lead character’s fate is sealed and nothing that happens to him has any meaning.

  26. movieman says:

    I know that my earlier comments weren’t terribly original, but this past holiday season took the Darwinian nature of the exhibition racket to outrageous extremes.
    Never in a million years did I think “M&M,” “Benjamin Button,” “Bedtime Stories” et al would be “played out” by MLK weekend.
    I guess the studios figure they can make more on ancillary sales than by keeping a successful movie in theaters for more than three weeks.
    “BB” might get a small boost when the Oscar nominations are announced, but the rest are pretty much toast at this point.
    Of course, opening a dozen “newer” titles in wide release over the past two weeks (with, sigh, even more to come next weekend) sure didn’t help any re: building an audience base or holding screens.
    On an unrelated note: who doesn’t love Leahnz? She’s the heart and soul of the MCN blog board.
    The subject never came up before, Leahnz, but I’m guessing that you’re a Peckinpah fan, right?

  27. Chucky in Jersey says:

    “Slumdog Millionaire” goes to 1,000+ theaters this Friday, so it’ll take off if it gets Oscar nominations the day before.
    Speaking of Oscar, scheduling the nominations for a Thursday means theaters can’t change bookings at the last moment to add nominated titles for the weekend. At least “Revolutionary Road” and “The Wrestler” both go national this week to take advantage of potential nominations.

  28. IOIOIOI says:

    Slumdog is going to get about as much traction as a pair of Chuck Taylor’s during the rain. Seriously; put a fork in it. It’s done.

  29. leahnz says:

    hey movieman: 😀
    re: peckinpah, of course! one of a kind, never to be repeated, hard-out, hard-case genius. i think seeing ‘bring me the head’ when i was a kid was the first deeply shocking movie experience of my life; oats’ ‘bennie’ stayed with me for so long after i saw the movie (the whole movie did, really), his fate probably had some weird formative effect on my psyche i’m not even aware of. (plus, i’d have to credit peckinpah for my first lingering girlish movie star crush on steve mcqueen after seeing ‘junior bonner’, and then more intensely ‘the getaway’, yowza! i didn’t know what it was about about mcqueen at the time that made me go all googly-eyed – i was too young and wouldn’t figure out ‘animal magnetism’ until a bit later – but i knew whatever it was about men, mcqueen had it in spades!). peckinpah seemed to be doing the slow-mo, graceful action sequence long before the hong-kong set made it vogue. and his beautifully done violence was such a world apart from so much of the silly graphic violence in movies these days, all the wanna-bees need to go back to the masters and learn a thing or two.

  30. leahnz says:

    (weirdly, as a lover of downey jr. and sean p., i’ve never seen ‘hugo pool’, it’s been on my ‘to-do’ list for what seems an eternity. perhaps it’s better that way)

  31. jeffmcm says:

    Hey IOI, can you elaborate on your thoughts re: Slumdog? It seems to still be considered ‘the frontrunner’ and is likely to get at least four or five nominations pretty soon here.

  32. mutinyco says:

    One thing that’s occurred to me regarding Slumdog… Isn’t it generally a rule of thumb that the Oscar winner gets at least one acting nomination? I know Return of the King didn’t, but if you consider that an award for the trilogy, then McKellen got nom’d for Fellowship.
    Is there any real acting nod traction for Slumdog?…

  33. leahnz says:

    (in case you missed it before movieman, that 😀 was me blushing, i should have put that!)
    looking at 2009, i’m really looking forward to ‘i love you phillip morris’, sounds like a genre-bending hoot, hopefully a return to form for carrey and ewan mcg

  34. IOIOIOI says:

    Jeff: the frontrunner of what? The Oscars? Please. It’s a turkey in a flashy suit. You coasties keep telling yourselves that, and try not to be surprised when it’s rightfully forgetten.

  35. movieman says:

    I just knew that you had to be a Peckinpah Gal (can I say “gal”?), Leahnz.
    First saw “The Wild Bunch” when I was eleven years old paired with “Pretty Poison” (Tuesday Weld at her Tuesday Weld-iest; always a very good thing) at an Ashtabula, Ohio drive-in.
    Caught it again the following summer on another double-
    feature with–I **it you not–Jerry Lewis’ “Which Way to the Front?”
    In between, I saw Peckinaph’s “The Ballad of Cable Hogue” which made nearly as monumental an impression on my precocious young mind, not for the violence, but for its emotional tenderness and mature sexuality. And Stella Stevens’ nudity is permanently seared in my memory bank.
    “Straw Dogs” is my second all-time favorite Xmas movie after “The Exorcist” (because I first saw it during its original December ’71 theatrical release, “SD” will always be a Yule flick to me). Would it be politically incorrect of me to confess to being turned on by Susan George’s gang rape scene?
    “Alfredo Garcia” is the first–and only–time a movie made me break out in hives. Literally. I finally worked up the courage to take a second look a few years back when it played on HBO, and it was even more brilliantly subversive than I remembered.
    Talk about a movie that was decades ahead of its time…
    P.S.= Variety’s (mostly) rave of “Phillip Morris” really piqued my curiosity.
    Of course, anything from the creators of “Bad Santa” automically commands my utmost attention and respect.
    With all the talk about a possible NC-17 rating, I sure hope that the eventual distributer (Strand perhaps, lol?) isn’t forced to whittle it down to appease the almighty MPAA gods.

  36. movieman says:

    Mutiny- Don’t be surprised if Dev Patel gets a Best Supporting Actor nod.
    There’s seemingly no end to Tinseltown’s worshipful embrace of “Slumdog Millionaire.” And that love just keeps on growing.
    At this point, the question isn’t whether it reaches $100-million at the domestic box-office, but how much farther than $100-milllion it can go.
    Quite a “back in the game again” turnaround for Danny Boyle after the ignominious fiasco of “Sunshine,” eh?
    As for me, I still prefer Boyle’s “Millions.” And “Trainspotting,” of course.

  37. Joe Leydon says:

    Mutiny: The Last Emperor won every Oscar for which it was nominated. But it wasn’t nominated in any acting category.
    IOIOIO: You are just plain wrong. Worse, you sound like Republicans who were predicting, as late as October, that Obama would never be elected. You’re not really suggesting that The Dark Knight could beat Slumdog Millionaire for Best Picture, are you? Keep this up, and you, like the Repugs, will feel the full force of the 500-pound shit hammer drop down upon you on Oscar night.

  38. mutinyco says:

    That was what ’87? 21 Oscars ago? I’d say that’s a pretty good barometer to go by then.

  39. IOIOIOI says:

    Jeff: what the fuck ever. This movie will not make 100m. It will die this weekend. Who wants to see it besides Coasties, that need a reason to feel better about their Iphones and fashion sense? It’s a dead fucking movie. It’s DOA.
    They can change the ads. They can out and out lie in the ads, but it will not change the simple fact of what this movie is… BULLSHIT. Downer bullshit.
    So please go against me you fucking daft ginger Jeffy. Please go against me. My record for predictions is better than yours on this blog, and here’s one for slumdog. It will get 5 nominations, and Boyle will win best director. It will lose best picture to THE BAT. Seriously you fucking poncy assholes: get in line or get out of the way.

  40. Hallick says:

    “You coasties keep telling yourselves that, and try not to be surprised when it’s rightfully forgetten.”
    Which movie do you think is going to outrun it at this point? I’d rather see The Dark Knight win my own self, but it doesn’t even seem like it’s coasting on fumes now. Heath Ledger’s trophy is TDK’s tip of the hat at this point. There’s a good chance it could be nominated for Best Picture, but it’ll be an honorary nod more than anything else.
    Then what’s left after that? Milk? Nope! Frost/Nixon? Hell nope! The Curious Case of Benjamin Button? I don’t feel a groundswell of need from that corner. The Reader? Almost nobody thinks the movie is nearly as good as Winslet’s performance in it. Revolutionary Road’s got a major passion deficiency, and Winslet’s win is going to be the recognition prize for that film just as much as Ledger’s is the one for TDK. The Wrestler’s not big enough, WALL-E is hurt for being animated, Doubt didn’t catch fire, Che’s not even a contender, Vicky Christina Barcelona won’t parlay the Globe win into a challengership.
    Unless, by some sad miracle, Gran Torino emerges as a surpise nominee (thanks in no small part to people being tired of the usual nominees this season), and somehow snowballs into serious contention, I think Slumdog’s fate is all but sealed.

  41. Joe Leydon says:

    Mutinyco: Well, as you yourself pointed out: Return of the King. And, besides, rules of thumb are meant to be broken.

  42. IOIOIOI says:

    I most apologize to Jeff now. Sorry sir. It was Houston’s very own SAINT FUCKING NICHOLAS running his figurative mouth. Seriously Joe; I know where I live. Where the fuck do you live? Probably behind a gate. Where fucks like you enjoy living.
    Hallick: ANH, Raiders, and ET. Annie Hall, Chariots, and Ghandi. All six great films, but the first three were robbed by a stupid fucking Academy that fails to see the long picture. No one is going to remember Slumdog. If it beats TDK. It will always be looked upon as the movie that should have lost to TDK. You go into the future with one of those EW “WHO SHOULD HAVE WON THE OSCAR POLL”, and TDK wins everytime. Why? The same reason why Begins was such a great film: REWATCHABILITY. How many people are going to watch a downer fucking tale about an Indian kid on a Saturday afternoon?
    Seriously: it’s time the Academy comes correct. If they make the same mistake again. They have pretty much killed off whatever chance they had to be relevant again.

  43. leahnz says:

    ‘”Straw Dogs” is my second all-time favorite Xmas movie after “The Exorcist” (because I first saw it during its original December ’71 theatrical release, “SD” will always be a Yule flick to me). Would it be politically incorrect of me to confess to being turned on by Susan George’s gang rape scene?’
    that’s a controversial scene to this day, isn’t it, movieman? i seem to recall peckinpah having to defend it against ‘glorification’ claims in the press, he certainly knew how to push the envelope in his day, what a hard case (sort of begs the question: why the hell was i even allowed to see ‘alfredo’ when i was a kid?! good grief)
    ‘P.S.= Variety’s (mostly) rave of “Phillip Morris” really piqued my curiosity.
    Of course, anything from the creators of “Bad Santa” automically commands my utmost attention and respect.’
    i didn’t even know ‘phillip morris’ was from the ‘bad santa’ crew, all the more reason to look out for it! i, too, hope it isn’t watered down for cinema ratings, why do we always have to wait for the dvd releases to get the real mccoy flicks in all their glory the way the director intended? very frustrating! 🙁

  44. brack says:

    IO: I’ve seen Slumdog Millionaire twice in theaters, so I’d say it has rewatchability working for it. SM and TDK are my favorite films from last year (that I’ve seen, which has been limited I admit).

  45. IOIOIOI says:

    I love watching Rocky Horrour on Xmas. Who doesnt enjoy a movie about sexual discovery on Xmas?

  46. IOIOIOI says:

    First off; sorry for attacking St. Nick, but I knew where he was going. So I had to take him out at the knees because that’s not cool.
    Brack: good for you. Let me quote from my favourite music video ever; “You’re a real UP person.” :D!

  47. Joe Leydon says:

    IO: What the motherfuck are you talking about? Look over my back fence, bro, and you will see a thicket of apartment complexes in which English is a second or third language. Go up and down my street, and you’ll find households as integrated as Bill Cosby-era Jell-O commercials. Hell, under my own roof, I’m the only Oh-Fay in a household that inlcudes a Jewish-Filipina and a Korean, and regularly hosts Asians, African-Americans and — dare I say it? — drunken Irishmen. Sorry, sport: You can pull that race card shit with a lot of other guilt-tripping white boys, and maybe intimidate the bejeepers out of them, but I’ll laugh in your goddamn face. While you were just an itch in your dad’s pants, I was helping a TV repairman service customers in the New Orleans Desire Projects. While you were still in kneepants, chum, I was giving first-time filmmakers like Mira Nair and Spike Lee props in The Houston Post. So be careful I don’t slap the taste of your mouth.

  48. brack says:

    Ha, great group.

  49. Joe Leydon says:

    You know what, IO? Tonight, of all nights, I should just shut the fuck up and agree: Free at last. Free at last. Thank God Almighty, free at last.

  50. IOIOIOI says:

    Joe: you look like fucking Santa Claus. Excuse me for not quivering in my boots at the motherfucker from the state that put that piece of shit in office. A fucking carpetbagger as the fucking governor of Texas. Mess with TEXAS! MESS WITH IT ALL FUCKING DAY! It’s a fucking tart, that likes a fisting.
    Seriously bitchpants; you were the one who fucking dealing race cards all day and all night. You went that direction. I simply feel that an award show that has been the best, is on the verge of being pointless.
    So excuse me for having a problem with them picking the small little movie, that makes them feel bad for being rich. When they should pick the fucking movie about the last fucking eight years, that should make them ashamed they did not try hard enough.

  51. Am I alone is suspecting “IOIOIO” is actually LexG and THX12251512? It’s like “The United States of Tara” on this blog lately…or Sybil. Or Andy Kaufman internets style.
    Incidentally, anyone else watch that “The United States of Tara” show last night? WTF was that show. I’ll give it a few more chances but talk about ill conceived. Talk about Diablo Cody selling a pretty half-assed concept at the peak of her 15 mins of fame.
    And when the hell did Toni Collette get so damn HOT!?! I’m guessing it was sometime after she decided to shave her arm pits. When her split personality was “T,” she was pure ownage.

  52. Joe Leydon says:

    Toni Collette has always been hot.

  53. mutinyco says:

    So, you’re saying you’d service her like a TV repairman…

  54. JB Moore says:

    Word up Leydon. I was thinking the same thing a few days ago when I almost crashed my truck thanks to one of those giant bus banner ads for “Tara”.
    Lex? Any thoughts on Toni? Does she deserve that name?

  55. Joe Leydon says:

    Mutinyco: Yeah, I’d like to jiggle her tubes until…. No, wait, even I am not THAT sleazy.

  56. Geoff says:

    Hey, IO, seriously – is it ok to love The Dark Knight AND Slumdog Millionaire? I have also seen Slumdog twice, both in crowded audiences, and the thing PLAYS like no one’s business. Is it going to make $500 million? No, but I can see $100 million – hell, the film has already made three times its budget on only 600 screens, I’d say Searchlight has done their job already.
    The film is not a downer – it certainly has its share of tough stuff, but the film earns its feel-good ending for sure. When you think about it, how many truly great “feel-good” films have there been, this decade? Most of the films at the top for me have been true downer films – United 93, Munich, Bloody Sunday, City of God, etc. – even Memento and The Departed could not really be considered feelgood films. I can count the exceptional feelgood films on one hand: Eternal Sunshine, Wonder Boys, Once, Juno, and Slumdog.
    And IO, I wish people like you and Jeff Wells would stop the faux resentment towards Slumdog as if it’s some elitist drama from Merchant-Ivory. This is Danny Boyle and the guy could not make an unwatchable film if he tried – it’s dazzling filmmaking. It’s a very exciting film with a great soundtrack. Frankly, I’m still amazed that the film has a place as the front-runner – the style just seems too modern to really please the older Academy members. No reason that he and Chris Nolan can’t co-exist.
    That said, The Dark Knight will be happy to just get the nod, which is not a sure thing. It deserves it, but I have a sinking feeling that Warners is pushing more dough to get Clint Eastwood in the final five, AGAIN. And Gran Turino is a big hit, now – it’s got a shot and if it gets nominated, it could even beat Slumdog, which would be very disappointing.

  57. LexG says:

    ALL PAY ATTENTION, LEX is about to make his post about UNITED STATES OF TARA (by popular demand), since some of you missed my preemptive rant about it a few months back:
    R E P U L S I V E.
    Campy women trying to be funny and being gross and manngered and vulgar and cartoonish and MUGGING and making stupid faces = THE MOST DISGUSTING THING EVER.
    I’m sure the Kathy Griffin devotees and the gay men who love them on TELEVISION WITHOUT DIETING are all circle-jerking over it, but that shit looks EMBARRASSING AS HELL; Like, if Jackie Chan put his grille up in some fish-eye lens and shouted OOOOOOKIE BOOOOOOKIE ZOOOOOINKY while making stupid mugging faces, it wouldn’t be as REPULSIVE, UNFEMININE, LAME, CAMPY, STUPID, SHAMEFUL, WHITE TRASH, LOATHESOME and ANGER/RAGE INDUCING as TONI COLLETTE uglying up and putting on some FUCKED-UP TRUCKER HAT and DOING STUPID ACCENTS and acting like that OTHER UNFUNNY HEN, TRACY ULLMAN.
    Ladies, leave being unseemly and gross and buffoonish to the MEN WHO AREN’T EVEN FUNNY AT IT.
    Women trying to be funny = THE MOST DISGUSTING SHIT EVER, unless it’s some REALLY CUTE CHICK being FLIGHTY AND DITSY AND SEXY at it. Women acting gross WHILE being UNWATCHABLY UGLY is more camp and unwatchable than a two-day HAIRSPRAY MARATHON.
    Sorry for the caps, but, well, you guys asked.

  58. jeffmcm says:

    IOI, I have not even seen Slumdog at this point, and in fact from what my friends are saying, I’m predicting a thumbs-down when I finally get around to it, so please be a little more precise in what you say about me (again, I have no idea why you’re tossing “Ginger” my way. Like people with red-hair and freckles? Not accurate.)
    At this point, I hope any movie that ISN’T The Dark Knight wins, to make the Oscars permanently irrelevant to IOI, in perpetuity. I think we’ll all be better off.
    PS: Annie Hall is a better film than the original Star Wars (and there is no movie with the title “A New Hope”, which is revisionist nonsense.)
    Meanwhile, to Lex: why again is it that you don’t have a girlfriend, you charmer?
    Also, you’re not British (“poncy”).

  59. jeffmcm says:

    (That’s IOI who isn’t British, not Lex)

  60. LYT says:

    “This is Danny Boyle and the guy could not make an unwatchable film if he tried”
    In the spirit of inauguration day: Yes He Can.
    It was called “A Life Less Ordinary.”
    “The Beach” was at least 33.333% unwatchable too.

  61. LexG says:

    McClane voice: EH! SORRY LOU, WRONG GUESS!
    The Beach and LLA OWN the hell out of Bitch-Ass Millionaire.
    If Dev Patel gets a supporting nod, he’ll be the ultimate “unknown/young/amateur/foreigner” who gets a S.A. nod then neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeever is heard from again.
    Freido Pinto will probably either end up in a bit part or two in some American indie, a la the Maria Full O Grace chick, or she’ll end up as the love interest in the next Will Smith movie.

  62. jeffmcm says:

    I have come to realize that I dislike more Danny Boyle movies than I like.
    Shallow Grave: snide and obnoxious.
    The Beach: Really terrible, especially in the last ten minutes when it gets downright insulting.
    28 Days Later: Good up to the last hour hour or so, then it gets profoundly stupid.
    Millions: Ingratiatingly awful.
    Sunshine: Sporadically dopey until the last twenty minutes when it turns into Event Horizon, a movie which at least knew that it was meant to be stupid fun.

  63. scooterzz says:

    io — a favor please?…the next time you’re down in the gift shop, could you pick me up an ‘arkham’ t-shirt (i assume you get an inmate discount)….
    and, lex….you’re sipping deep tonight….some of your biggest fans are gay and watch ‘usot’ (i’ve seen the first eight…it gets better)….
    and…fwiw–dev patel was great in ‘skins’ and bbc is sending out dvd’s like crazy (presumably, to push oscar as much as the show)….so, maybe…not likely but maybe….

  64. LexG says:

    Scooterzz, hope I didn’t somehow offend you or anybody else; You’re one of my faves, and it’s a well-known fact that I am open-minded and a friend to people of all stripes– er, except for women who have ever gotten married, and women over the age of 31. (Just kidding, Jesus.)
    And I AM sober and probably risking putting my foot in my mouth (again), and it’s just kind of hard to define in general; But there’s a certain sensibility to something like TARA that just rubs me the wrong way and makes me actively… for lack of a better word, embarrassed. Something about women doing comedy and acting hysterical and diva-ish and this celebration of put-upon, unattractive women being all “you go, girl!” See also, Connie and Carla, Hairspray, Mamma Mia, most catty high school “satires,” anything with Bette Midler.

  65. Kambei says:

    I see above that someone mentioned both Eternal Sunshine and Once as feel-good movies. Really? I took the ending of Eternal Sunshine to mean that they were doomed to be stuck with each other and keep repeating their disasterous relationships (although I have read the original draft of the screenplay–perhaps that is why). And the ending of Once is pure unrequited-love-Brief-Encounter stuff. No?

  66. christian says:

    “Would it be politically incorrect of me to confess to being turned on by Susan George’s gang rape scene?”
    Not if Peckinpah didn’t direct it that way. But then Pauline Kael called SD a “fascist work of art.” Peckinpah answers her in his amazing Playboy interview. I love SD but find it unpleasant. I watch “Junior Bonner” repeatedly, so I prefer Peckinpah’s elgiac side. Although THE KILLER ELITE is pretty wild. He was a great action director.

  67. movieman says:

    Didn’t Kael accuse “Dirty Harry” of being “fascist,” too, Christian?
    Pretty knee-jerk response coming from such a smart lady.
    And it was always interesting to me how Kael loved turning against directors whose careers she helped “make.”
    Peckinpah is a good example of her fickleness.
    Between “Straw Dogs,” “A Clockwork Orange,” “Dirty Harry” and Polanski’s “Macbeth,” 1971 sure served up a helluva slate of holly, jolly, “fascistic” Xmas flicks, didn’t it?

  68. Cadavra says:

    Don’t forget the biggest ’71 Xmas release of all: the not-exactly-liberal THE FRENCH CONNECTION!

  69. Cadavra says:

    BTW, re SLUMDOG: let me take the middle ground and restate that it’s a well-made film that’s being mis-sold as some kinda feel-good upper, which turns off folks like me who prefer at least a granule of truth in marketing. My guess is that it will be the default BP winner, partly because it doesn’t deserve it, but mostly because every other likely nominee is in some way flawed, and SLUMDOG will be everybody’s second choice. The only likely upsetter could be MILK, riding in on a combination of BROKEBACK guilt, Prop. 8 backlash, and the ferocity of Penn’s performance.

  70. christian says:

    I would say in Kael’s defense that her points on SD are extremely insightful and I agree that Robert Ardrey’s “territorial imperative” that much inspired Peckinpah is a subtle form of male fascism, i.e., the Woman Really Wants It and Man Must Kill To OWN.
    And in the case of DIRTY HARRY, I think that her critique about deifying the bullying forces of the law are not without merit, especially in a year after the decade when America saw policemen hose down African Americans. It’s not an outrageous position she takes. She recognizes their artistry and technique.
    And I love Seigel and Peckinpah, but I wonder how women in general respond to that scene in SD? 1971 was a pretty harsh year.

  71. Stella's Boy says:

    Did anyone else see the trailer for Fired Up? I caught it yesterday before MBV3D. I seriously thought I had traveled back to 2000. It was so surreal. They are still making and releasing movies like this in 2009?! Eric Christian Olsen, 31 and playing a high school kid?! What the fuck is going on? Sorority Boys suddenly doesn’t seem all that bad anymore.

  72. LexG says:

    Pauline Kael fucking sucked.
    Three worst film critics of ALL TIME:
    1. Kenneth Turan
    (allow room for 80 million miles of time and space to pass, because KEN DOUCHERAN is just that horrible, horrible, HORRIBLE.)
    2. Michael Medved
    3. Pauline Kael
    I’ve been hearing about this crazy old bag and her stupid theories and pet directors and weird writing tangents for 25 years, and I don’t care. She was full of shit, batty, and probably a FUCKING LOON. “OOOO, OOOOH, but her WRITING STYLE was so alive and made you think even when you didn’t agree blah blah blaaaaaah” Don’t care, she sucks, her writing sucks, I’m never challenged when I read some OLD CONTRARIAN BULLSHIT she whipped up.

  73. leahnz says:

    hey christian, re: peckinpah and ‘the territorial imperative’ (the misogynist angle piqued my interest so i looked this up on wikipedia, i’m no peckinpah expert or scholar), he used ‘the territorial imperative’ as inspiration while re-writing ‘straw dogs’, but was it necessarily an influence on his life philosophy in general?
    i haven’t seen ‘straw dogs’ or that rape scene in ages so i can’t comment on specifics, but i remember it being deeply disturbing, starting out insinuating that her ex wasn’t exactly forcing her and there was an element of pleasure there, but as things progress with the other men it turns violent and sinister. i suppose i really should watch it again to get a better feel.
    i think it would be safe to assume that peckinpah was a good old-fashioned chauvinist and a product of his time; his films are always about men, the the conflicts of men in a man’s world (much like scorsese and mann), but men are also portrayed as brutal and abusive and lost, and women as victims, often struggling to get by in a man’s world. perhaps this theme reflected peckinpah’s own internal struggle with the social upheaval of the time (emerging feminism) and his conflicted view of men as top dogs and the need to be bullies to stay there. just a observation anyway.

  74. leahnz says:

    or ‘an’ observation, if indeed i can write proper-like

  75. christian says:

    leahnz, if you read the PLAYBOY interview Peckinpah calls Ardrey a “prophet” I believe. It’s the kind of interview nobody would dare give anymore. I think you’re right that he was just an old-school chauvinist with conflicted feelings. But that almost everyone of his films includes a rape or near rape scene, maybe there’s something else going on in his mind.
    And Lex, that is stinging criticism from somebody who waited in line to see TWILIGHT and loves Tom Leykis. NON-OWNAGE.

  76. jeffmcm says:

    Yeah Lex, I think your joint “Women aren’t funny/Women are lousy film critics” onslaught is unfortunate and tiresome.
    You don’t have to agree with Kael’s reviews to understand that she was smart, brave, and often made some really good points that nobody else did. And she loved some great movies.

  77. LexG says:

    I always found her an infuriating contrarian irritant, same as, say, Ed Gonzalez or Armond White (though he’s just kind of pleasantly goofy.)
    I didn’t say “women are lousy film critics.” Manohla Dargis is one of my favorites, and I like Ella Taylor a lot, too. And some of those chicks who filled in with Roeper were smokin’ hot.
    And I didn’t “wait in a line” to see “Twilight.” I went to some early matinee at the Arclight and walked right in.
    Peckinpah is one of my idols. Guy fucking OWNED.
    But I did say that vulgar women mugging and trying to be funny is NEVER funny.

  78. jeffmcm says:

    And all women are vulgar and unfunny, right?

  79. storymark says:

    “And I didn’t “wait in a line” to see “Twilight.” I went to some early matinee at the Arclight and walked right in.”
    After ranting for MONTHS about how you were going to every show opening weekend, that it’d make $150 million that weekend, and The Stew would get piles of awards for her performance.
    Now… now you try to downplay? Which I guess makes sense, seeing how wrong you were and all….

  80. leahnz says:

    thanks for that, christian, interesting. sounds like peckinpah had issues with women. but damn, he did violence and action like no other! (why is genius so often tortured?)

  81. movieman says:

    Y’know I love ya, Lex.
    And while I agree with you that Kael could be an “infuriating contrarian irritant,” your softball pass to Armond White (“pleasantly goofy”) sticks in my craw.
    There is nothing remotely pleasant about Armond: not his tortured–gawd-you-just-know-this-dude-is-constipated-every-agonizing-second-of-his-miserable-probably-on-antidepressants-life–prose; not his insidious and insipid regurgitation of the whole neocon handbook; not his (generally) atrocious taste in movies; nada.
    Crackpot Armond makes Elvis Mitchell’s rambling, fanzine gibberish seem like the ghost of Vincent Canby–the most elegant prose stylist to ever review films–by comparison.

  82. chris says:

    Wow. Worst tortured-rhetorical-device-of-stringing-together-stuff ever? Particularly the anti-depressant part. I’m no White fan, but what does being sick and taking medicine –whether or not it’s true of him — have to do with anything?

  83. LexG says:

    Yeah, I read back over that Armond White thing and bristled… I think I meant to include Rex Reed in there somewhere, and left him out in a flurry of fast typing, and that’s who I had more in mind for the “goofy” description. But White is so out-there and contrarian that I almost HAVE to think it’s some bemused shtick. Guess you’d know better than me, as I don’t know much about him and try to laugh off his shit as harmless attention-whoring, something I’d know from.
    “After ranting for MONTHS about how you were going to every show opening weekend…”
    Storymark, you actually thought a 35-year-old man was going to go see “Twilight” five times a day for three days, holding court dead center in the middle of consecutive packed multiplex screenings? Really? Reeeeally?

  84. jeffmcm says:

    Yes, Rex Reed is the true outmoded gibbering moron. Armond is a weird guy – he definitely writes for the sake of provocation, which can have its uses, and I’d say his greatest failing as an author is the lack of a sense of when he’s being ‘honest’ and when he’s just being ‘contrary’, but he’s too smart to ignore. Also, I don’t think he can accurately be defined as a ‘neocon’ as much he is just a pure contrarian. Since the NY media establishment is liberal, he has to take positions in opposition to them, no matter what they might be. Remember that he’s a gay African-American, after all.
    Hey Lex, I think we all more or less knew that you were joking re: Twilight, but here’s the thing about jokes – they become exponentially less funny with repetition, especially when each repetition offers no new nuance or twist. Since the Twilight/Kristen Stewart material became unfunny after the third or fourth iteration, it became really pointless after the hundredth – and what kind of reaction were you really intending?

  85. LexG says:

    I don’t know, but you can expect a full-on rehash of all my Kristen Stewart gems when “Adventureland” drops. I won’t be varying the material in the LEAST.
    Something to look forward to.

  86. movieman says:

    Chris- I think I might have actually been too kind to Armond White. Everyone I know who regularly crosses paths with him in the NYC crix community describes Armond as certifiable.
    And I think that’s apparent in his curmudgeonly writing and misanthropic worldview. This is clearly one miserable, tortured human being. The saddest part of all is that you get the sense he believes his most brain-blowing shit (even–hell,
    especially–the knee-jerk Bush apologia/defense).
    I used to be amused by Armond’s cranky arbitrariness (worshipping at the altar of Spielberg while genuflecting before some of the most esoteric, and explicit, foreign language gay films to cop U.S. distribution deals, etc.), but now I’m just bored by his clueless, misguided rants against anything–excepting Spielberg, of course–that smacks of “mainstream.”
    And yeah, Rex Reed is indeed “pleasantly goofy,” Lex. Too bad he’s been on auto-pilot the last 30 years.
    Back in the day, that dude could write circles around 90% of today’s so-called “movie critics.”
    Check out Rex’s 1971 review anthology “Big Screen/Little Screen” if you don’t believe me.

  87. jeffmcm says:

    Adventureland actually looks like a good movie – to bad it will henceforth be tainted by association with Lex in his ongoing crusade for unwarranted attention.

  88. jeffmcm says:

    By the way Lex, have you ever heard the phrase ‘dry drunk’? It refers to someone who acts like a boorish addict in every self-centered, obnoxious, not-dealing-with-his-issues way except without actually involving alcohol.

  89. LexG says:

    I don’t know what you’re talking about, though you can stop trying to needle me any time.

  90. movieman says:

    …another reason to loathe (and occasionally fear) Armond is that he’s simply an atrocious writer.
    Those dryly meandering, stylistically inert sentences of his reek of the worst type of academic crap.
    He comes across as an embittered old college professor who never got over the fact that he was denied tenture.
    Or that his students hate him because–for all his self-professed “braininess”–nothing he says makes a lick of sense.

  91. movieman says:

    They also hate Armond because he’s a fucking bore who doesn’t have a sense of humor–about himself, or life in general.

  92. LexG says:

    Speaking of Adventureland, whose idea was it to put a limp-dick, no-charisma DOUCHEBAG like Jesse Eisenberg up on the silver screen with a firebrand megawatt talent like Kristen Stewart?
    That’s like pairing 1997 Angelina Jolie with Breckin Fucking Meyer.

  93. IOIOIOI says:

    Geoff: Slumdog is a perfect movie for people who feel bad about having an Iphone. Seriously; this movie is an empty suit, but they rewarded Crash because of their homophobia. So maybe they will reward Slumdog out of nothing more than pure WHITE GUILT! Who doesn’t love WHITE GUILT? IT’S WICKED!
    Jeff: fuck you. Seriously; I remember your tired fucking ass discussing Crash/Brokeback ad fucking nauseum, and you are giving me shit? Fuck you, fuck off, and sit the fuck down. Let me teach your ginger ass a thing or two.
    Annie Hall is shit. It’s boring shit, that Manhattan proves with it’s mere existence. It’s a movie all but forgotten like most Woody Allen to time. Yet it was better? FUCK THAT BITCH! That’s what you are: a ginger bitch. ANH is better because it’s a timeless tale, that changed this nation. It’s what the nation needed after Nixon and Nam, but it got the shaft. Wow. Epic. The movie that will last longer than almost any other movie ever made got the shaft for some tedium. Seriously; you have to have been the kid whose parents slapped him a lot. Youre such a twat. I understand.
    Secondly slappidy twat-face boy; TDK is a once in a lifetime flick, that sick fucks like you are ignoring. You are ignoring for random shit like people LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO!
    So you fucks will most likely get together, give the Indian film that wont make more than 45m the Oscar, and TDK will just exist like ANH as films TOTALLY FUCKING RIPPED OFF BY TEDIOUS BULLSHIT!
    I swear: you people are the mundane. The only one whose special is Lex. You should be grateful he graces your lives each day, because you boring fucks do not deserve SUCH OWANGE!

  94. Noah says:

    “Annie Hall is shit.”
    “It’s a movie all but forgotten like most Woody Allen to time.”
    IO, I don’t even know where to begin with those statements. All I can ask is: do you really follow films? I mean, I get that you watch movies and have your own opinions, but do you seek out the opinion of anybody else? Because if you did, I think you’d see that quite a lot of film lovers remember not only Annie Hall, but most of Woody’s oeuvre. I disagree with you on The Dark Knight, but why is it so important to you that it gets recognition from the Academy? It’s the second most successful film of all-time, so clearly you’re in the majority, what does an Oscar matter?

  95. IOIOIOI says:

    There’s only one Noah on the NET, and he sure the hell is not named FORREST. Seriously though… I fucking dislike Annie Hall beating a film that changed THE FUCKING WORLD, and you are giving me shit for it? Really? CHANGED THE FUCKING WORLD? That’s the point doofus: THE DARK KNIGHT TRANSCENDED A GENRE! You may not understand how, but it did. It’s a pivotal moment in the history of film. Where somethign derived from art considered too juvenile… made an impact. It’s not about the money. It’s about the IMPACT!
    You do not get this, but you are you. You think I have no idea about the Barrymores, Forbidden Hollywood, Howard Huges, James Cagney, or even fucking Frankenheimer. This proves my point. Most of you motherfuckers are pointless around here. Audi.

  96. Noah says:

    I guess my first mistake was actually taking you seriously enough to ask you a question with the hopes that you would actually answer it instead of prattling on with your pitiful whining about how “nobody understands!” You are in the majority, dude, 531 million dollars in ticket sales means that lots of people share the same opinion as you. My question is why it means anything to you that The Dark Knight gets recognition from an organization you claim is stupid?
    And just because you’ve seen movies or heard references about the Barrymores or Howard Hughes doesn’t mean you know jack shit about what the critical consensus is about Woody Allen. Annie Hall won Best Picture in 1977 and the guy who made that film has a film that came out this year that will get nominations. The film you’re screaming about being neglected was made by a director whose contributions to the world of film this year were 1) an animated bastardization of his own work and 2) a needless sequel involving Shia Labeouf swinging on vines. If the Academy’s job is to find filmmakers who will be making worthwhile films for years to come, then they got that particular award right.

  97. IOIOIOI says:

    Only a fucking crackpot could believe the Beard or Lucas has made less of a contribution to the world than Allen. Allen is a fucking pyrrea, that has to live in Europe. Why? HE MADE HIS BED, AND HE’S SLEEPING IN IT!
    You go on about prattling on, you ass, and look at your response. Seriously; I have never stated the Academy is stupid. You witless dolt. I have stated they make the wrong decisions based on the simple fact, that they are nearsighted. They simply do not get — a lot of the time — the ramifications of their decisions.
    The reason why TDK is Oscar-worthy is because it’s the best film of the year. Nothing has touched what it is, what it says, and what it represents. I would love MILK to win, but they are homophobes. I would love the modern day Hitchcock to win, but he’s apparently an ASSHOLE! Seriously you prickfaced douche; Fincher is make exceptional film after exceptional film, and they treat him like Hitchcock. Freakin daft assholes. Frost/Nixon is not as good as it’s source material. While the Wrestler is about some folks who sacrifice all of themselves to tell a story in a ring, but that’s not HIGHBROW ENOUGH for the Academy. So that leaves TDK and Slumdog. You telling me that slumdog is more imporant, more relevent, then TDK? What does that film say that MILLIONS DID NOT? HE MADE THIS FILM TWICE!
    SO in closing: you suck as a writer. You lack heart, soul, and any reason anyone should give two shits about you as a columnist. The only reason Poland likes you: you share the same qualities. Poland at least can overcome his shortcomings. You seem to be nothing but them. Fuck you. Fuck you. Oh yeah… Fuck you. Good day.

  98. brack says:

    I don’t think Millions and Slumdog Millionaire are the same movie. They both share maybe a similar energy at times (though not exact), but they are very different thematically.

  99. IOIOIOI says:


  100. Noah says:

    I might suck as a writer, but I know how to spell pariah. And I know my facts, like for instance that Woody lives on the Upper East Side of New York City, not in Europe.
    And also, I’m not sure if you’re aware of this, but people have different opinions about stuff…film being one of those things. So, that’s great that you’re passionate about The Dark Knight, but do you really think that there’s no other opinion to be had? I don’t think Slumdog or The Dark Knight should win, but I also know that whether or not the Academy agrees with me, it doesn’t change how I feel. Your love for The Dark Knight will continue with or without the help of the Academy and most people agree with you, so why are you throwing a tantrum like a two a year old?

  101. IOIOIOI says:

    Noah: Jeff is a douche. It’s not a tantrum when you a insulting a douche. This board would be better off without the gingernut. He of course thinks of himself as a victim, when he’s just a douche. So douches not get treated with real-life reactions. Such as this; fuck you Noah.
    You do realize people with money can own more than one house, and live in more then one location? Really? You do know this right?
    If you do not. You pretty much proved in one post why arguing on the internet is futile. You refer to me as a fucking two-year old, then response like a twat. A big floppy twat, that has no sense of what’s right. It’s the right time, to do the right thing, and reward the right movie.
    Right is right, floppytwat. I am simply sick of a nearsighted Academy failing to pay attention to simply BOXSETS that show off how important that little statue is for a legacy.
    It’s bad enough Daniel Plainview got the shaft when he had the best thing going. It’s bad enough Fincher will once again get the shaft. The Joker, on the other hand, did what needed to be accomplished. So what’s right is right… floppytwat.

  102. IOIOIOI says:

    Damn it! I rpoved why you cannot fucking respond to an argument on the internet! FUCKING TYPOS! SON OF A BITCH! FOILED AGAIN! Nevertheless; we agree to disagree Noah, but who do you want to win?

  103. Noah says:

    “You do realize people with money can own more than one house, and live in more then one location? Really? You do know this right?”
    Woody has lived in NYC his entire life, he plays the clarinet once a week at the Cafe Carlyle and is at practically every Knicks home game. You do realize that when someone films something in another country, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they live there? You do know this right?
    The weird thing is that I agree with you about Fincher and I’m hoping Benjamin Button wins the day, but I won’t be offended if it doesn’t. I still get to watch the movie over and over and experience the joy of watching it. It being shafted at the Oscars won’t change that. And my floppytwat is getting corrected in Thailand.

  104. LexG says:

    IO is a fucking *national treasure.* That is some awesome shit above; Minutes after reading his 5:49 post, I was out taking a walk down to the convenience store to get a soda, and found myself giddily giggling like a complete douche all the way thinking of that hilarious rant. Had an extra spring in my step and everything. Great stuff, man.
    Back in movie news and unrelated to anything:
    SWEAR I’ve seen that FUCKING TRAILER for HE’S NOT THAT INTO YOU now 999,999,999 times. JESUS CHRIST, did New Line pay every theater in America to run that shit before EVERYTHING?
    The ARCLIGHT HOLLYWOOD has shown it in front of EVERY MOVIE I’ve seen there in the last three months. And that’s DOZENS of movies.
    And what the FUCK are HACK-ASS TV NOBODIES Bradley Cooper and E FROM ENTOURAGE doing within 30000000 miles of ScarJo and Jennifer Connelly?
    And I’ll go out on a limb and wager that all of America’s neutered, asexual MOVIE CRITICS will come out of this shitpiece bragging about this Ginnifer Goodwin NOBODY. Like, grow a fucking dick, douchebags: She’s not even the fourth-hottest chick in the movie.

  105. LexG says:

    GREATEST. ACTRESS. EVER. Chick FUCKING OWNS and her performance in HAVOC is on par with vintage Brando or Pacino in DOG DAY and SERPICO, most awesome chick ever, I wonder if she would think I was funny, because she rules and I wish she would go out with me to Outback Steakhouse then I’d wanna hang out with her in my apartment on the couch playing 50 CENT’S BLOOD ON THE SAND video game while she giggled and listened to my awesome stories and we made fun of McDouche on the Cold Blog.
    Seriously other than K-STEW the only other chick in the world I’d even think about marrying would be Anne Hathaway SHE WOULD DEFINITELY THINK THAT I RULE.
    As soon as I get FAMOUS I’mma ask her out, it’ll be awesome.

  106. jeffmcm says:

    Movieman, I agree that Armond is a really poor writer, who just seems to be piling sentences and thoughts on top of each other in the hope that somehow they’ll make sense.
    IOI, ironically, by jabbing me with an insult (“Ginger”?) that doesn’t in the least make sense or have any bearing on reality, it’s actually MORE insulting than if you had come up with an appropriate insult (of which there are many). So, uh, good job I guess.
    By the way, IOI, have you ever heard of ‘self-awareness’? As in, do you have any idea what you sound like to someone who doesn’t live inside your own head?
    And Lex, you really shouldn’t be mocking IOI so openly and freely. It’s cruel of you.

  107. christian says:

    There’s no doubt that IO and Lex are the same person, or “Two-Face” in the parlance of TDK, which is the only arrested esthetic state IO exists in.
    ANNIE HALL changed a whole facet of American cinema that filmmakers are still trying to duplicate. No, nobody got any Alvy Singer action figures, but I saw both those films in the same year and both had a profound effect on my life. And others. Not so much IO, since I’m assuming his humorless attention span can’t process cultural satire nor human relationships.
    And how has TDK changed the world? Or even film?

  108. christian says:

    I meant I saw STAR WARS and ANNIE HALL the same year. FYI.

  109. Christian, I’ve always felt that IO and Lex were friends in real life and are playing the world’s most pathetic and long-winded practical joke on the blogosphere. It’s the only way to explain how these two idiots wound up on this place filled with intelligent and level-headed beings. I imagine they’re sitting at one or the others apartment with their laptops whilst drinking cheap cask wine and replying on here as opposed to having social lives and going out to meet girls whose self esteem is so low that they would agree to go back to their place before waking up and realising they rooted the fat dude from Superbad. Just an unfamous version of him, obviously.
    Jeff, I looked up “ginger” on UrbanDictionary and I couldn’t find anything that was not the red head thing.
    This entry has given me a headache so I’m going to bed. This place is going down the toilet. What a waste.

  110. frankbooth says:

    Moon of Jupiter (IO) saw Jeff’s blog entry about haircuts and assumed the photo illustrating it was one of him. Hence, the ginger thing. Rather literal-minded, but what do you expect.
    You guys are lousy detectives.

  111. storymark says:

    “Storymark, you actually thought a 35-year-old man was going to go see “Twilight” five times a day for three days, holding court dead center in the middle of consecutive packed multiplex screenings? Really? Reeeeally?”
    No, Lex, I really didn’t. But thanks for admitting that your little act is just that. Cheers.

  112. yancyskancy says:

    The Oscars are fun. But I’m stunned that after 80 years, there are still people who expect some sort of “relevance” from them, as if the results of their voting have something to do with being right or wrong. Some vote their hearts, some vote politically, some vote for the least objectionable choice. Annie Hall was a rather bold pick for that group in 1977, as Star Wars would’ve been. But it is really so shocking that a clever, adult romantic comedy beat a Joseph Campbell influenced Saturday matinee pastiche at that particular moment in Academy history?
    I’m not convinced that the current age demo of the Academy skews young enough to honor TDK with a Best Picture win (yes, of course, the film has tons of older fans — but are enough of them Academy voters? We’ll see).

  113. yancyskancy says:

    That should be “IS IT really so shocking…?” rather than “IT IS…” Obviously.

  114. IOIOIOI says:

    Gingernut, Gingernut. Gingernut. FT: I hope Thailand works out for you.
    Camel said (figuratively); “It’s the only way to explain how these two idiots wound up on this place filled with intelligent and level-headed beings.” BULLFUCKINGSHIT! Level-headed? Poland went Coco for fucking COCCO PUFFS over the Watchmen bit of business. You have lost your fucking mind over countless things. Jeff has something every week, that pisses him off. While Don Lewis runs hot and cold between being fucking angry, and being enlightened. Seriously; Lex and I are the two sane people on this fuck blog. We at least do not act like SUPERIOUR CUNTS TOWARDS OTHER PEOPLE! Spell your fucking name with a fucking “C”. You daft ass. There are few things funnier than Priscilla Queen of the Desert giving me shit!
    Christian: Fuck you, and fuck off. You love to act superiour like Priscilla up there, but your defending Annie Hall shows how out of fucking sorts you are as a human being. Seriously? You are stating that movie changed anything? Seriously? All it did was give shitty filmmakers with limited and/or shitty sense of humours a chance to create and/or write shitty movies with shitty scripts, that close to 99 percent of the population can give two shits about… you douche.
    So this is what you need to Old Man Christ. You need to take those MGM/FOX Woody Allen boxsets, turn them sideways, and shove them up your Belladonna-esque butthole. Seriously; fuck off or act right.
    For too long some members of this board have acted as if they are morally superiour… NO FUCKING MORE! You act like a douche. You get treated like a douche. You do not want it to get personal, you tubby esoteric motherfuckers, then keep it on the straight and arrow.
    You fucking assplugs need to figure out what you want out of this blog. It might be a bit better if you had a sense of humour. If you were kind instead of atrociously over the top with your rude attitudes.
    It’s one thing to accuse Lex or I with being dicks, but you fuckers do not have one leg to stand on. You fucking fucks of fuckociousity the likes of which no one has ever… CHILL THE FUCK OUT! If not… ding-dong… ding-dong… ding-dong.

  115. Cadavra says:

    IO, ladies and gentlemen! He’s here all week! Thanks for coming and drive safely!

  116. IOIOIOI says:

    Don’t forget to mention the steak dinners at the 6 and 9 shows! Also; opening this week with me is Greg Fitzsimmons, Arthur Lange, and the comic stylings of Reverend Bob Levy. I’m John Melendez, and here’s JAY LENO!

  117. Jeffrey Boam's Doctor says:

    Please stop the mutual circle jerk IOUIOU and LexGee, it’s making this place utterly unreadable.

  118. christian says:

    “If you were kind instead of atrociously over the top with your rude attitudes.”
    “superior cunts”
    “fuck you and fuck off”
    “fucking assplugs”
    “fucking fucks of fuckociousity”
    “tubby esoteric motherfuckers”
    Anyway, we just went through 8 years of this shit, so no more engagement with the deranged.

  119. The Big Perm says:

    IO is just like Bill O’Reilly. He probably voted for Bush. Thanks for fucking up our country, IO.

  120. IOIOIOI says:

    So no more entanglements with the likes of you? What will it take for you daft turdflickers to realize, THAT YOU ARE THE PROBLEM! It’s not me. It’s not Lex. It’s you. You fucking people are a bunch of dilholes, that need to act up.
    The facts of the matter are these; “Jose… don’t know who you are… don’t much care… but you are as presumptuous as you are wrong.
    Posted by: David Poland at January 20, 2009 08:13 AM”
    IT STARTS AT THE TOP! We are a bunch of bitches! Accept it, embrace it, and deal with it.

  121. IOIOIOI says:

    Big Perm: Fuck you. You daffy ass.
    Priscilla Queen of West Hollywood: You best watch yourself.

  122. jeffmcm says:

    Frank, I like your explanation, except that the haircut photo is of a kid around the age of 10. Otherwise, well-done.
    Otherwise, Christian, your last post is pretty much spot-on, and in this case significantly easier to put into practice. For all his obnoxiousness, Lex is always intelligent and reasonable about 50% of the time, which is a much better average.

  123. IOIOIOI says:

    Jeff MacMahon: UBER-DOUCHE! Seriously bitchnuts; cursing only upsets the nice white people. Everyone else deals with it. Deal with it. Also, you have, never contributed anything to this forum. Not once, not now, not fucking ever. Christ might be an old man, but he brings some meat. What do you bring? You bring the posting equivalent of a fucking pizzaroll. Fuck you, get bent, and all that jazz.

  124. jeffmcm says:

    You’re terrible and you need help.

  125. LexG says:

    Since it’s legitimately come up and thus somewhat relevant, if not movie-related:
    When DID “ginger” start referring to redheads in that way? “He’s/she’s a GINGER.” In 30-some years I’d never heard that, then a couple years back I started seeing some blogs and TV reviews referring to actors/TV personalities as “a ginger.” Like that British douche on LIFE; I think EW always calls him that.
    Then I was in line at the market to buy booze at like 11pm, one register open and taking FOREVER, and I was stuck behind these not-hot, chatty, annoying overopinionated P.A.-type chicks, and one had red hair. And she was all telling her friend that even though “I’m a ginger, I’m not attracted to other gingers.” It’s fucking REDHEAD. When did this GINGER shit starts? Last three, four years, right? Like around the time 25- to 30-year-old women started using “boy” for guys that they like.

  126. jeffmcm says:

    As far as I know, South Park invented it.

  127. Clearly IO has been digging into Lex’s supply.

  128. frankbooth says:

    I think “ginger” is Brit slang that has caught on here in the last few years.
    “Frank, I like your explanation, except that the haircut photo is of a kid around the age of 10.”
    Gaseous Moon thinks (I think) that it’s a pic of YOU at age ten that you dug up and posted. Maybe.
    Or he’s just nuts. Not that the two are mutually exclusive possibilities.

  129. jeffmcm says:

    All I did was google “bad haircut” and picked the first one that I liked.
    The kid in that picture doesn’t even have red hair!
    Honestly, I think it’s a bastardization of some kind of Cockney slang, so distorted as to lose all meaning or wit.

  130. leahnz says:

    frankb is right, ‘ginger’ is brit slang from way back in the day, derogatory in nature; i vaguely remember something about the english originating the term as a dire insult to the scots, who have a serious tendency towards red hair. the poms and the scots do not play well together, mainly due to the fact that in the past the english have been a pack of colonist pricks invading and claiming as their own lands near and far in the name of the crown…but i digress

  131. Blackcloud says:

    “ANNIE HALL changed a whole facet of American cinema that filmmakers are still trying to duplicate.”
    Maybe. But Star Wars is of world-historical significance. That is something Annie Hall is not, has not been, and will never be. Someone earlier said that choosing Annie Hall in 1977 was a bold move. Maybe. But in retrospect (which, natch, is always how these things work), picking it over one of the most significant cultural phenomena of the post-WWII era does not redound to the Academy’s favor. Still, given all that, does it matter that Star Wars “lost” to Annie Hall? Lost what, exactly, a popularity contest of 6000 people? Annie Hall needs the Oscar more than Star Wars ever could. Let it keep it. Star Wars didn’t need the help, and neither does The Dark Knight.

  132. christian says:

    Is being a cultural phenomena the main criteria? Hard to believe I’m debating the value of ANNIE HALL here, but outside of the world of genre films, AH had a vast cinematic influence. And it had its own cultural influence, as it was a success around the world. But it’s not a popularity contest. Otherwise FLASHDANCE should have recieved a nom.

  133. leahnz says:

    plus, annie is the only (if there are others i’m drawing a blank) female pothead in classic cinema history! (i know that doesn’t exactly contribute to the debate on an intellectual level, but whatever, i adore annie)

  134. Speaking of female potheads. Anna Faris in Smiley Face – might i just add – is one of the funniest performances I have ever witnessed. Truly a treasure. COME ON FRANK! YOU KNOW I LOVE SURPRISES!

  135. leahnz says:

    kam, as a fan of the ‘stoner genre’ i’m sad to say i haven’t seen ‘smiley face’, but i shall endeavour to rectify that

  136. LexG says:

    Smiley Face is fun but it’s probably one of the lesser Gregg Araki movies (DOOM GENERATION and NOWHERE = TOTAL OWNAGE, and Mysterious Skin is near-excellent if deeply unsettling).
    That said, Anna Faris is one of the key exceptions to the “women aren’t funny” Lexrule. Even in something like “Just Friends,” she commandeers the screen and just OWNS– you CANNOT take your eyes off of her.

  137. jeffmcm says:

    The “women aren’t funny” Lexrule is one of the more stupid and hateful Lexrules.

  138. LexG says:

    Jeff, please watch no less a GENIUS than CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS explaining (BRILLIANTLY) why WOMEN AREN’T FUNNY (excepting Anna F. and Brittany Murphy, for me.):

  139. jeffmcm says:

    I’m sure he was drunk when he said that (no shocker, he’s probably drunk right now too).
    Again: this is insulting, hateful, and most likely dishonestly designed to annoy people.

  140. LexG says:

    And okay, if you choose to ignore his awesome insights, ask no less a COMIC AUTHORITY than JERRY LEWIS if women are funny.
    (I’ll concede, to cross threads, Kristen Wiig IS funny and awesome.)
    I am in a SWELL MOOD right now BECAUSE K-STEW SAID OWNS, but at the risk of making myself the subject of discussion, this is very hard to make anyone believe on a blog, where mood and intent are difficult to discern sometimes, but it would probably surprise many of you, but in REAL LIFE, actually most people genuinely like me. EVEN when I drop these quasi-sexist meathead bon mots. Most every chick, even old married chicks, that I hang with or work with or go to acting class with, generally think I’m a charming, somewhat dickish buffoon who means a lot of this shit but diffuses it with an old-school Rat Pack Swagger. I guess that doesn’t translate to blog post form.
    Just too bad I don’t really wanna bang any of those chicks.

  141. jeffmcm says:

    Acting class? This is indeed a surprising development!!
    Maybe if you altered your writing style, these types of tonal misunderstandings wouldn’t come up. I certainly wouldn’t bother you nearly as much if I actually believed any of the above non-dickish points.

  142. LexG says:

    Yeah, but it’s kind of a waste of time. Like me all HAMMING LIKE A BITCH in some classroom, and all the hot chicks want to bang the better looking dudes who want to get into soaps. Fucking ripoff.
    Usually I come in and I’m like, Hey what’s up sugartits, wanna do a scene together from LAST TANGO? And they all walk away from me and go practice their stupid cold read or some shit.
    Waste of money, I say. I’m paying to meet hot chicks not get up there and mug like a douche. Acting classes in L.A. favor the meatheads and bimbo types, and yeah they’re the ones who wanna get together after class and read their SIDES, while I go home to practice my shit solo.
    It sucks being old and fat when you don’t have any money to pay for it.
    Anyone see EDMOND with Bill Macy? HOLY SHIT what the fuck was THAT?????? Love Gordon and Mamet, and Macy gives THE PERFORMANCE OF A LIFETIME, but after the hilarious opening 30 minutes, it turns vile and weird and ugly, droning from episode to episode with little coherency; Like, it RULED when he was cheapskating all those strippers and hookers, and BAI LING = MASSIVE BONEAGE.
    But after that it got weird and unpleasant… and kinda boring. And yet 10 hours on, I’m still DISTURBED AS FUCK by that creepy-ass shit, usually the sure sign of a good movie.

  143. jeffmcm says:

    You get out of any class what you put into it, but you’re a grown man and shouldn’t need to be told that. If you’re still taking the classes I’m assuming you’re lying above (again) and actually getting something out of it.

  144. LexG says:

    Nah, I’ma quit it soon, waste of my time, especially if I’m not hooking up, which is the only reason I signed up (since acting is easy and ANYONE could do it.)
    Wait, I should try to be less caustic since THE STEW might be peeking in.

  145. jeffmcm says:

    Well, everyone I know who has a SAG card has taken multiple classes – although more to the point, they also do improv and perform on stage on a very regular basis, because – here’s the twist – it’s something they actually enjoy doing in and of itself.
    I really don’t know how it is, Lex, that you could expect that people _don’t_ have total loathing for you.

  146. LexG says:

    I’m kicking myself because they had SURVIVOR auditions Monday AM and douche over here had to work; FUCK.
    The next season of REAL WORLD, the greatest idea ever would be to put a 36-year-old fat sleazy Ron Jeremy looking motherfucker in the house, just mercilessly stirring up shit and hitting on the 21-yr-old hotness.
    WHATEVER GETS ME FAMOUS FASTEST, I don’t give a shit.

  147. I think I just threw up in my mouth a lil bit.

  148. jeffmcm says:

    In reality, when people have something that they think is really important to do, they skip work.
    Survivor, of course, is not something anybody who takes themselves seriously would put on that kind of list.

  149. chris says:

    For the record, movieman, I’m not even talking about your opinions of White. I’m talking about the shocking lack of humanity and compassion in your comments about him.

  150. Blackcloud says:

    “AH had a vast cinematic influence. And it had its own cultural influence, as it was a success around the world. But it’s not a popularity contest.”
    1) Of course it’s a popularity contest. How else do you think something gets a) nominated and b) wins?
    2) Are you seriously arguing that Annie Hall’s cultural influence is in any way comparable to that of Star Wars? Really? As for cinematic influence, perhaps, but given that any studio would surrender several dozen Annie Halls to have one Star Wars, I’m not sure you’re making a particularly compelling argument.

  151. jeffmcm says:

    If it was a pure popularity contest, it would be called the People’s Choice Awards.

  152. Blackcloud says:

    ^ The only difference is the number of voters. Well, maybe the way the votes are tabulated. But you get my point.

  153. The Big Perm says:

    I bet the old married chicks Lex hangs out with refer to him as the “paunchy, smarmy guy” they hang out with.

  154. jeffmcm says:

    Blackcloud, I understand what you mean, my point is that the Oscars have different criteria beyond “what did the rabble like this year” – and by rabble, I mean in their terms, not mine. They’ve ignored plenty of high-grossing movies before and they’ll do so again.

  155. Blackcloud says:

    Jeff, I don’t think we disagree here. My point is that the only difference is the criterion for judging what is popular. For the PCAs, it does often reduce to “what the rabble liked.” But Oscar too has his favorites, and we’ve known for a long time that certain types of movie are more popular with the Academy and its various branches than are others. Hence why certain types of films (not mentioning any names) are nominated over and over again and others are not. The former meet the voters’ criteria and hence are popular with them, and so are nominated. But in the end, it does come down to a popularity contest. It just depends on the standard being applied. Which is to say, on who is deciding what’s popular.

  156. Blackcloud says:

    P.S. Just to be clear, if I had a vote for Best Picture it would go to The Dark Knight. But you’re not going to hear me complaining that it didn’t get a nomination. And that’s because I’m not going to.

  157. christian says:

    What you forget Blackcloud is that AH winning was actually an upset of sorts since comedies rarely win BP. I’m assuming you’re young and weren’t there. You might remember AH fashion as being hot.
    And Lex, you’re so boring and ordinary. Catherine O’Hara and Andrea Martin not funny? Yeah, they destroyed SCTV — could have been a brilliant show…

  158. Blackcloud says:

    I was around in 1977, but certainly the Oscars were not on my radar screen; nor were Annie Hall’s fashions. I’m not arguing against Annie Hall. Any of the other three movies would also be overshadowed by how colossal Star Wars’ turned out to be. But no one could have known it at the time. It’s easy to say in 2009 that Star Wars was this unparalled phenomenon and wonder how it didn’t win. No one was thinking along those lines in 1977/8. This is an argument that can only be made in retrospect. Which means that arguing about the afterlives of this year’s nominees is futile. We won’t know for a long time.

  159. christian says:

    And people still talk about ANNIE HALL to this day. Just as with SW. So time has been kind to both.

  160. Joe Leydon says:

    Actually, many people forget that neither Anne Hall nor Star Wars was considered by most to be the front-runner that year. The flick with the most nominations was….. The Turning Point.

  161. The Big Perm says:

    I’ve never even heard of that movie!

  162. Cadavra says:

    Lex, you wanna become real famous real fast? Find Osama bin Laden. Bonus: people would love you. You might even get some squack.

Quote Unquotesee all »

It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon