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David Poland

By David Poland

BYOB Weeekeound

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52 Responses to “BYOB Weeekeound”

  1. Joe Leydon says:

    I must confess: G.I. Joe was a lot more fun than I expected.

  2. Joe Leydon says:

    Er, Ding Dong Ditchers? Huh?

  3. Joe Leydon says:

    But never mind: Congrats.

  4. dietcock says:

    Joe: Agreed. Parts of G.I. Joe had me absolutely giddy. A silly little (well… not so little) trifle of a movie, but rousing and never contemptuous of its audience.

  5. Hallick says:

    The “What’s being said about…Inglourious Basterds and District 9” window is like mainlining one quote whore after another quote whore. Peter Travers is a douchebag when he does it, but this is Hot Blog worthy?

  6. LYT says:

    “Ding Dong Ditchers”
    People who ring doorbells and then run away.
    This won’t win me any Oscars, but should be fun.

  7. ployp says:

    Many congratulations, LYT. I noticed that the movie has not been added at IMDb yet.

  8. leahnz says:

    “People who ring doorbells and then run away.”
    is that really what the movie is about? that’s hilarious
    good on ya LYT

  9. christian says:

    Go LYT!

  10. jeffmcm says:

    Congrats, LYT.
    GI Joe has a certain amount of contempt for its audience (people won’t understand these characters unless each one is explained with a dozen backstory flashbacks) but the Paris chase scene redeems it for me.

  11. jeffmcm says:

    Oh, I caught up with Orphan this weekend. Pretty solid, suspenseful stuff and I was especially surprised at how far they went in terms of putting little kids into violent situations with fire and guns and even sex.
    My only complaint was that pretty much all the climactic action was overcut and shot murkily so that I could hardly tell what was happening and where the characters were in relation to each other. Oh well.

  12. LYT says:

    Thanks all. This will be made on the super-cheap but I intend to give it everything I can.
    The Paris chase is the best part of G.I. Joe, by far. I think Jeff is being way too easy on Orphan, though. Final twist = most ludicrous thing in ages.

  13. leahnz says:

    does it turn out that she is in fact not an orphan at all but comes from a loving, supportive two-parent family??!! (just a stab in the dark)

  14. Biscuits says:

    oh man Leahnz… i’ve never said this before — but better. The twist is wayyyyy better…

  15. chris says:

    The twist (wrong, BTW, Leahnz) IS ludicrous. It’s supposed to be ludicrous, but the movie is in on the joke, and it’s close to brilliant.

  16. Biscuits says:

    And by better I mean so, so much worse. Your twist has actually already been made — it was called Deep End Of The Ocean.

  17. jeffmcm says:

    LYT, maybe my mind was contaminated by the Orphan twist having been spoiled for me weeks ago, but it was one of my favorite aspects of the whole movie. I’m a fan of ludicrosity when the filmmakers commit to it. And come on, in a decade featuring BOTH The Happening and the remake of The Wicker Man does Orphan even come close to being ‘most ludicrous thing in ages’.

  18. jeffmcm says:

    There should be a ‘no way’ inserted into that last sentence somewhere, I leave it up to you, the reader.

  19. leahnz says:

    oh, i was actually trying to make a joke! so much for my rapist wit

  20. leahnz says:

    re: my ‘orphan’ comment

  21. LYT says:

    I didn’t feel like Orphan did commit…it was boring the first half hour or so at least, occasionally sadistic, then finally let its freak flag fly for the last 45 minutes or so…those last minutes are awesome, but not with that build-up, to me at least.
    Can’t begrudge others their enjoyment, but not consistent enough for my liking.

  22. Where’d my comment go? 🙁
    Congrats LYT!

  23. Foamy Squirrel says:

    @leahnz – Your second joke pretty good too. 😉
    And congrats LYT!

  24. a_loco says:

    I think the reason Basterds isn’t getting too much love on Twitter is because it’s too hard to spell.

  25. I’ll defend the first 90-minutes of GI Joe till I’m blue in the face. I went on opening morning under a sort of obligation (since Paramount’s public screening strategy made the film into bigger news than it otherwise would have been), but I ended up completely enjoying the first 3/4 of the movie. I hate the finale, with its dumb plot twists and neutering of certain characters for who-knows what reason, but the first 2.5 acts are lively and fun. Fun, colorful heroes vs. fun and colorful villains, with action scenes that are entertaining, creative, varied (since each setpiece involves several major players), and always easy to follow. In a summer of disappointments, it was the rare movie that was far more enjoyable than I was expecting. It may be a lousy film, but it was an awfully good movie.

  26. The Pope says:

    Maybe this belongs on another thread, but looking at the numbers for IB, I would like to be the first one to stand up and say I was wrong in suggesting that “the movie may find it hard to find a sizable audience.” $35m+. Tarantino’s biggest opening ever.

  27. Geoff says:

    You know, Tarantino deserves a lot of credit for this – next to McG, no director went out as hard to promote his film this summer as QT. I know he gets shit for being pretentious and smarmy, but the dude certainly was not above making the rounds like a real champ. Have not seen it, but really want to.
    GI Joe was fun – I enjoyed it better than any other Sommers film. The effects were kind of cool (though way too expensive, apparently), the characters were goofy, and sorry, but I loved the eye-candy – Rachel Nichols just looked gorgeous, I could not take off my eyes off that woman. Disappointed to see that any real photos of her on the web, she does not really have red hair.
    That said, the second half of the summer has just been fantastic – The Hurt Locker, Public Enemies, 500 Days of Summer, and District 9 were all excellent movies. Julie & Julia was also a pretty good entertainment. Really the best summer in years, honestly. Saw District 9 while away on business, last week, and was just blown away – not a perfect movie, but damn good. Amazing effects, good performances, and just a knock-out ending. Only drawback is that there were only two or three well-drawn out characters, the rest were quite cliched.
    But Sharlito Copley just does an amazing job, really as good as Goldblum in The Fly, where the comparisons are going to be flying – I think Oscar-worthy. Think about it – how many performances can you think of the past 20 years since The Fly that REALLY show the anguish/resentment of some one going through that type of transformation, as fantastical as it is? Sorry, I really dug The Dark Knight, but Aaron Eckart’s Two-Face perfromance isn’t even in the same ballpark. Some of you might laugh, but even Tom Hanks in Philidelphia (solid, don’t get me wrong), portraying some one with Aids, did not do it as well – he made it much showier. This is tough stuff for an actor to pull off and Copley deserves a lot of credit. If you guys can think of any “transformational” performances in recent years that are as good, I’d love to hear about them because I am at a loss.
    Regardless, between D9 and Moon, it has been a great summer for sci fi.

  28. yancyskancy says:

    Congrats, LYT, and thanks for the explanation of Ding Dong Ditchers. I’m sure more than one of us were thinking the story had something to do with Loreena Bobbitt.

  29. Joe Leydon says:

    At the risk of sounding like I’m stealing Lex G’s shtick, I thought Sienna Miller looking mighty fine as a brunette with glasses. In fact, I can’t remember the last time someone so hot wore glasses throughout a movie.
    As for the flashbacks — I saw the movie with my wife and son, and they both made specific, unsolicited comments about how much they liked the flashbacks, so go figure. To each his own.
    And I realize I’m coming late to the party with this, but I was amused by the cameos by Brendan Fraser and Kevin J. O’Connor.
    You know, I realize reviews would have had no effect on the grosses whatsoever, but I wonder if Paramount unsmarted itself by not having press previews for this one.

  30. christian says:

    So when David called IB a “niche film” in his video roundtable, how does the big BO reflect that statement? That’s some niche!

  31. David Poland says:

    Yes, Christian… niches can be big.
    Would you argue that District 9 is not a niche film?

  32. Wrecktum says:

    “Yes, Christian… niches can be big.”
    My wife’s got a big niche.

  33. anghus says:

    i dont get why you still insist on the whole ‘niche film’ thing. if everything is a niche film, than nothing is a niche film.

  34. frankbooth says:

    Goddamit! I guess I can just throw the ding dong ditchers script I’ve been working on for the last ten years in the garbage now! Thanks a lot!
    (Are your ding dong ditchers transexual aliens, too?)

  35. christian says:

    What Anghus said. I’d argue that anything can be called niche on the basis of its genre or subject. And I know people I who saw D9 and IB that are not genre fans. Just curious through WOM.

  36. I always dig the ‘hot chick with glasses’ thing, so I’ve always been a fan of The Baroness (as well as Tina Fey and Dana Scully). I wish they had gotten a better actress, but that’s a minor quibble.

  37. LYT says:

    Me too, Scott, but the movie Baroness doesn’t wear the right kind of glasses for that…I mean, it’s shades most of the movie.
    Most fan-made Baroness costumes are better.

  38. LexG says:

    Questions about H2, which is four days away but might as well be dropping in ’12 based on the seeming (unfortunate) lack of hype and promotion:
    1) Can I assume it’s not being screened?
    2) Has there even been a legit explanation of, or even sound theory on, WHY Dimension for a 11 years now thinks this is a franchise that needs to drop in *August*? Even the successful H20 had to have been a two-week wonder, no?
    Surely nobody in 1998-2009 is thinking ANY movie will still be lingering in theaters TWO MONTHS ON when it’s “relevant” to the holiday at hand.
    Not saying conclusively this would do more business in mid-October, but it certainly wouldn’t do any LESS. I’m a huge Zombie fan and Halloween is pretty much my Star Wars, but what with the scorching temperatures and lingering summer blockbusters, I’m practically having to kick myself to get more pumped for this thing in the tail of August. I don’t think even the fans realize it *drops* this week.

  39. LYT says:

    1) Yes, except for junketeers and select horror bloggers who got invited to the premiere.
    2) The SAW franchise OWNS the Halloween date, and is apparently perceived as more formidable than the FINAL DESTINATION franchise. (BTW, I’d lay money that H2>S6, and I LOVE Saw 1-3 more than almost anything)
    “what with the scorching temperatures and lingering summer blockbusters, I’m practically having to kick myself to get more pumped for this thing in the tail of August”
    Theaters are all air-conditioned, y’know.

  40. LexG says:

    HOLY SHIT is anyone watching FALLON (ie, GOD) and seeing this ALEXA CHUNG??????????
    HOLY EURASIAN MEGAHOTNESS YES PLEASE. GodDAMN, Hey Poland, do a SUPER MOVIE FRIENDS with LEXG and ALEXA CHUNG this chick fucking rules. Plus I’m SEVENTEEN DAYS SOBER LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER (YEP YEP) and guess what? It’s actually EASIER to get a BONER when you don’t have a bottle of BEAM and sixteen beers in your system.
    GIANT BONER. But then guess who’s on NEXT TO HER? KEVIN MOTHERFUCKING CONNOLLY, and of course that GINGER MIDGET is all smirking, YEP, I KNOW ALEXA, fuck that’s depressing.
    Because all the FANS have missed the LEXMAN, here’s the update: I have not only given up the BOOZE, I have given up on all showbiz aspirations and have decided to either MOVE TO TOKYO (GOOD IDEA) or become a SUBSTITUTE TEACHER (BAD IDEA.)
    Since I will CLEARLY never have actual vagsex with any famous celebrity woman, I am throwing in the towel and possibly/probably leaving L.A. for good.

  41. jeffmcm says:

    I find it infuriating that the other studios have basically ceded October to Lionsgate and allowed their awful franchise free reign to make piles of money. I mean, when the best horror movie to be relased in any month of October in the last 6 years is Quarantine, you know there’s a problem.

  42. LexG says:

    Dimension wasn’t “ceding” shit when they dropped H20 or RES-ERECTION in the dog days of August.
    But I have a feeling Zombie’s H2 is going to get flattened.
    Oh well, speaking of AWESOME HORROR, THE ROW is gonna drop two weeks later. PATRIDGE POWER. CHUNG POWER. EVIGAN POWER.

  43. LexG says:

    ALEXA CHUNG. You should be BOWING.
    Again, she is both EURASIAN *and* HAS A BRITISH ACCENT, and is all tall and stretchy and modely and KNOWS KEVIN CONNOLLY.
    MASSIVE BONER coupled with MASSIVE DEPRESSION. You need to GIS the HOTNESS and come back explaining how you can go on with life knowing you’re not taxing celebrity squiff.

  44. As far as the lack of Halloween 2 promotion, I’m guessing (and I’m really pulling this out of my ass) that the stunningly positive media attention and surprisingly high weekend box office for Inglourious Basterds (gah, had to go back and spell it wrong) leads the Weinsteins to think that money can be better spent supporting the latter in hopes of continuing its would-be success story (legs, Oscar talk, etc). I’m not saying I agree (money is money, no matter which movie is making it), but they might be thinking that propping up the prestigious pic will make the company look better in the press than just making sure that the sure-to-be profitable horror sequel opens above $20 million. Again, it just re-iterates the boneheaded play of the WC opening two of their biggest movies back to back.

  45. LexG says:

    Then I’m gonna go into CUTTER CHATROOMS and hit on all the chicks.

  46. Cadavra says:

    “money is money, no matter which movie is making it”
    Not necessarily. Tarantino and Pitt are probably gross players on IB; doubtful that anyone is on H2. It would be in the Weinsteins’ best interest to push the latter, as they’ll keep all the dough.

  47. I hadn’t thought of that Cadavra, but you’re dead-on. Which is course makes it even dumber that they seem to be almost dumping Halloween II.

  48. Stella's Boy says:

    My memory of Halloween 07 and its promotion could be faulty, but if I remember correctly H2 is being promoted in similar fashion. Like the remake H2 has been getting a huge push for months on horror sites: ShockTillYouDrop, Arrow in the Head, DreadCentral, etc. They report on every single trailer, photo, TV spot, Zombie comment, whatever. The diehards have been well aware of H2 & August 28 for a long time now. Recently, the TV push began. Within the past few days I’ve started to see a ton of TV advertising. That’s for the more casual filmgoers who need a reminder of the movie and release date. I don’t get the sense that H2 is being dumped. It seems to be a clear strategy: hype it for as long as possible on the sites that reach the genre freaks and then closer to the release date get the word out to the rest of the moviegoing public.

  49. I’ll concede that it may just be my point of view, but I remember the release of the first 07 Halloween as somewhat of a big deal (with extra press due to the leaked work print). Granted, I saw the film months earlier at a test screening, so I was genuinely curious if the fans and my fellow film geeks would dislike it as much as I. It just feels more muted this time around. Just my take.

  50. don lewis (was PetalumaFilms) says:

    I can’t get away from the “Halloween 2” commercials when I’m watching baseball on TV. And even my “out-of-the-movie-loop” wife said to me the other night, “wouldn’t HALLOWEEN be a good date to release this???”

  51. Stella's Boy says:

    Scott maybe the combination of competition from The Final Destination and the fact that H07 is mind-bogglingly awful makes H2 feel more muted.

Quote Unquotesee all »

It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon