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David Poland

By David Poland

BYOB – Gobble Gobble

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32 Responses to “BYOB – Gobble Gobble”

  1. yancyskancy says:

    I’m guessing Peter Jackson is none too thankful for the early reviews of THE LOVELY BONES.

  2. Blackcloud says:

    Judging from the reviews, looks like the downward trajectory that began with “Two Towers” continues.

  3. Hunter Tremayne says:

    And I’m thinking that Warners have been very, very smart about SHERLOCK HOLMES. They have long-leaded it to the creme-de-la-creme, but they have kept it away from Oscar bloggers, bloggers in general and the press. To date it has just been screened to industry, who have apparently eaten it up.
    Now, as the centre cannot hold, as we have seen with almost everything released amongst the “big four” they are poised to make hay with the new ten nominee equation, which was designed to have a populist movie with critical acclaim merit a place.
    I read the script for HOLMES a year ago. It was good then, and I heard it became great. Every major Oscar contender thus far this year has fallen short in some regard.
    Quite why a four-quadrant big-studio picture with serious chops being released on Christmas Day is being dismissed as a major player by bloggers is a tribute to a Warners masterplan that is worthy of LeCarre. Yes, they may reap the whirlwind, but if the movie plays as well as I hear it does, they may reap a golden harvest. And, coincidentally, make zeitgiest Oscar bloggery redundant forever.

  4. mysteryperfecta says:

    Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Safe travels.

  5. jeffmcm says:

    Fiddlesticks and rumple-tee-tee! Happy holidays to all.

  6. IOIOIOI says:

    Watch out! Jeff has found the spirit of the holidays, and may get a SPIRITED FREAK ON! Beware, but be JOLLY! Happy Thanksgiving to you all.
    Oh yeah… Cloudy… how dare you besmirched the greatness known as Two Towers. On this eve of festive gaiety, you sir, broke my heart. I hope you are happy.

  7. Joe Leydon says:

    It’s a miracle that we’re even here and alive.

  8. Blackcloud says:

    Hey, IO, PJ broke my heart turning in the turgid mess that is “Two Towers” a year after giving us the greatness that is “Fellowship of the Ring.”
    But I decree pumpkin pie for all. That should mend any bruised or damaged cardiac muscles. It always does the trick for me!

  9. IOIOIOI says:

    Cloudy, the besmirching you are giving Two Towers is just despicable. It’s the best of the series. If you disagree, then you get a stern shaking of the fist in your direction!

  10. martin says:

    IO, you’re wrong! Now go back in your hole.

  11. IOIOIOI says:

    Martin, this is your future calling. Oh I am sorry. It’s actually 1985. Apparently you peaked way back then, and your past self is wondering what the hell happened. Seriously man, what is up with that little piece of flesh on your shoulder with teeth?

  12. IOIOIOI says:

    Also, David Wenham would like me to tell you; “TO KISS HIS UNHOLY ASS!” Goofying on fucking Two Towers. You dirty rats.

  13. leahnz says:

    io, if you’re hard-out i sincerely hope you traipse around in one of these:
    (and for the laugh at the end, really:)

  14. bulldog68 says:

    Some random nothingness, but I just realised that every movie that Jim Cameron has ever directed that has been either a critical and/or commercial success has started with T or A. Terminator 1&2, Aliens, Abyss, True Lies, Titanic. He must be a real T & A man. Wonder where Avatar will fall?

  15. LYT says:

    Is the title of this post seriously quoting GIGLI?

  16. Wasn’t crazy about Two Towers theatrical cut, but I rather liked the extended version. Conversely, while both versions are pretty great, I actually prefer the theatrical cut of Return of the King, as most of the extra stuff in that one was cut for quality, not time (and it shows). I loved King Kong so I’ll be seeing Lovely Bones with genuine anticipation. But then, I think What Dreams May Come is an underrated gem, a dark and sad romantic and family drama underneath all of the water-color art direction.

  17. Foamy Squirrel says:

    Blasphemy! Those shirts are reserved for cast and crew who worked on the Helms Deep battle!
    I have friends who will slap you with their gloves for daring to sell them to an outsider!

  18. leahnz says:

    well, foamy, that fake T doesn’t look much like the real deal for starters, which has the ‘m’ crossed out, and the knock-offs have been around for ages so that horse has pretty much bolted, i’m certainly not trying to ‘sell’ them…if your friends were at dry creek they can chillax (film crew didn’t shirts tho)

  19. leahnz says:

    sorry, get shirts

  20. anghus says:

    i worked on a movie with some massive battle scenes. months of running up and down hills and trying to avoid being run over by horses. and there were all these shirts given out to the crew by the second unit director, and people were going nuts trying to get one. as if it was some badge of honor and you were less of a participant if you didnt get one. but some people work for the work, and some people work and get some kind of thrill for the validation of a cotton/poly blend. i don’t fault people for appreciating a t-shirt, but why would someone who didn’t work on the production want one?
    people who want to posess a crew shirt for a film they didn’t work on puzzles me. i can understand people wanting to own a piece of movie memorabilia. Siskel owning the suit from Saturday Night Fever or PJ owning the King Kong model from the original film. But when i see crew jackets on ebay i kind of scratch my head. I knew a guy who made a couple of hundred bucks every year selling the crew jacket for the tv show he worked on. He could turn a 20 dollar windbreaker into a plane ticket to Puerto Rico.
    I’m thankful i have a place to rant my random thoughts on film. I’m thankful for Blu Ray players under 100 dollars and a Thanksgiving Weekend with 3 films i really want to see.
    In no particular order
    Ninja Assasain (I’m a Wachowski apologist)
    Fantastic Mr. Fox
    The Road

  21. Chucky in Jersey says:

    The first words on “Avatar” are coming in and the tone will surprise you.

  22. leahnz says:

    ok, just to be clear the shirt i linked above AS A JOKE is NOT one of the actual t-shirts issued to the cast/extras, it’s just a knock-off of the phrase, which has taken on a second life and become popular with fans because it also can refer to the wearer as a warrior in TTT having survived the battle of helms deep

  23. Happy Thanksgiving everybody! Thanks for being my internet friends and for giving me a place to have cool film conversations since I can’t have any in real life 🙁

  24. Foamy Squirrel says:

    I thought “slap you with their gloves” was a bit of a giveaway that I wasn’t serious – I may need to be less subtle in future. 😉
    Chucky – I think “surprise” would have to depend on your current view, and given the range of tones out there some people are definitely not going to be surprised.

  25. From that Avatar link: “The problem is with cutting in between 3D focus points and perspective,” I said the exact same thing after seeing the Avatar Day preview. The 3D is excellent, but it was at times tough to adjust to the constant changing of 3D focus with all the action editing and so forth. Am definitely very much looking forward to Dec 11 though.
    The Two Towers was my favourite of the LOTR movies.

  26. IOIOIOI says:

    Damn right, Camel. Damn right!

  27. martin says:

    Chucky were there any other reviews you can link to? This reviewer calls it “vomit-inducing” and “a horrible piece of shit”. Hopefully that’s not the final word on the film, as it looked at least visually well-made in the trailers, and I have a hard time believing Cameron has made something that’s completely worthless like this viewer suggests.

  28. I must say, it irked me that the Guardian were presenting that article as an ACTUAL review and not just some gossipy piece of “news”. The layout of the page suggests they are actually passing it off as an official opinion for future reference.

  29. Hallick says:

    Aw, c’mon Kam. It’s a statement from “a real live entertainment worker who has seen a ‘fairly large glimpse’ of the film”. That doesn’t qualify as gospel in your book? The anonymous word of a LIVING ENTERTAINMENT WORKER (circus clown? Kraft services table minder? dude who pumped the gas into the truck that delivered the FedEx boxes to the accountant that worked on “Old Dogs”?) who saw an oxymoronically large glimpse of a two hour and a half hour movie didn’t chisel the point home in stone for you?
    What’s a pointlessly anonymous guy/girl gotta do to make you happy here? Watch the WHOLE movie from beginning to end before making a blanket comment about the entire film and saying “overall its a horrible piece of shit”?
    You monster. You KamikazeMonsterV2.0.

  30. leahnz says:

    anyone who thinks that ‘review’ on defamer (and then regurgitated by the mental midget xan brooks) is real outta have their head examined

  31. I think the word i’m looking for after reading Hallick is “lol”.

  32. leahnz says:

    i should have added to my comment above, apparently for physiological reasons the brains of about 6% of people simply can not handle 3-D viewing, with symptoms ranging from disorientation, headache and nausea thru to full-blown blowing of chunks, so becoming violently ill in a 3-D flick IS possible for an unlucky minority

Quote Unquotesee all »

It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon