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David Poland

By David Poland

Gervais Gives ‘Em Hell

AND Downey kills…

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42 Responses to “Gervais Gives ‘Em Hell”

  1. IOv3 says:

    that’s a weird fucking award show.

  2. Good Dr. Not Bordwell says:

    Oh, good, so that wasn’t something I dreamt after drinking beer and watching football all day.

    On the other hand… Please tell me DeNiro’s acceptance speech was the nightmare I had half an hour after I fell asleep on the couch.

  3. leahnz says:

    david brent is looking skinnier

    (in honour of not-so-skinny david brent, “why d’you wanna work here?” )

    RDjr was kinda creepy, and i say that as a bit of a worshiper since the olden days

  4. The Pope says:

    Not only was the host laughing at the HPFA but a lot of those there were also laughing… and this is the second year they have been open about it. So, it seems almost as if the Globes know that they are joke but like the small-town drunk they don’t mind you laughing at them so long as you buy them a beer.

  5. anghus says:

    i loved it, laughed my ass off, and thought Gervais was wonderfully innapropriate. what did they expect? even the ads had Gervais saying how awards shows were boring tripe and that the entertainment would be watching him take the piss out of celebrities.

    Calling out ‘gay scientologist’ though.. too easy… and kind of sad in a day and age where we keep trying to tell kids ‘it gets better’.

    While it is fun watching Gervais dismantle the room and the HFPA, i don’t think it has the intended effect. It feels like the HFPA thinks that allowing themselves to take a couple of pokes to the ribs will help their credibility. It does not. Especially when the hammer is being swung so often, so hard, and by so many.

    In defense of the Globes: wasn’t it great seeing Katey Sagal up there on stage right after Christian Bale? And wasn’t it fun watching Bale just go ape shit on stage?

    The only ones who seem intent to fuck up the Globes are those who still perceive this as a serious event. And the only people who do those who refuse to allow themselves to laugh at the general absurdity of award season.

    The problem with the Globes is, as usual, identity. I like Gervais taking potshots at the big egos. I like it more when the big egos can take a laugh, or better yet fire back. I mean, if they want, fire Gervais, have Ryan Seacrest host and revert to form: another 3 hour hand job by an organization often equated to being little more than starfuckers.

  6. movieman says:

    I concur, Anghus.
    If they can’t take a (much-deserved) joke at their over-indulged selves (hey there, Tom Hanks!), screw ’em.
    That said, after Friday’s BFCA awards telecast and yesterday’s GG where the same people/movies won the same awards (and pretty much gave the same damn acceptance speeches), is it bad sportsmanship of me to say that the next six weeks are going to be “The Long March to Inevitability” once again?

  7. christian says:

    These shows are unwatchable. Gervais isn’t that funny. And the weird tension between “aren’t we whores” and “the winner is” is…weird.

  8. York Durden says:

    What accent was Bale doing this time? He sounded almost Irish.

  9. arisp says:

    Sounded to me like DeNiro’s speech wasn’t even written by him.

  10. jtagliere says:

    I think it’s hilarious that Downey Jr called him out, then proceeded to do his little “would love to fuck all of you” routine, which is basically the kind of awards show crap that Gervais was lampooning. I say Tina Fey and Steve Carell should host everything.

  11. cadavra says:

    York: Bale was speaking in his own voice; he’s Welsh.

  12. Samuel Deter says:

    Why does Claire Danes talk like a twelve year old. Her speeches yesterday and at the Emmy’s made me embarrased for Hugh Dancy.

    Also, the dig at the Tourist was beautiful.

  13. Jeffrey Boam's Doctor says:

    How did anyone keep a straight face when they read ALICE out or moreso when BURLESQUE was mentioned.

    TMZ interns write sharper material than Gervais. Not as strong as last year, meaner yes, but not clever or strong.

    DeNiro went 180 after the Letterman appearance and read something that appeared to be Villanch discards from 85.

    You know its a stunning night for the women when Halle Berry was outclassed by about 20 other women. Portman’s goofy laugh was so endearing, she was losing me til that happened. Melissa Leo stepped off Deadliest Catch and provided the only machismo of the nght.

    Pres of the Globes looks like the first victim of the naked chick in Lifeforce. His press cred is that he writes for Aussie’s Film Ink.. hahahahahahahaha

    The Globes are memorable for the cutaways alone. Who’s talking to who and who looks like they’re in complete pain.

  14. RP says:

    The real joke about all this is that the celebrities think that they’re being funny by being ‘meta’ about the HFPA. “Ha…ha…this organization is a joke, let’s make fun of them at their own award show (smile)!”, but they still campaign for the awards and show up every year. The best joke on the HFPA would be for someone like Downey to actually not show up and pretend that it’s a legitimate organization. The whole thing stinks of the Oscar ceremony after 9/11, where everybody showed up to make sure they could say some version of “We’ve been through a terrible time, but the show must go on”. The honorable thing to have done would have been to cancel the ceremony, and say “You know….we don’t think we should be having a party this year to celebrate when a lot of people don’t care.”

    And Dave, if you’re going to any of the circle jerk parties associated with this, you’re part of everyone else’s joke, and just don’t seem to realize it.

  15. leahnz says:

    apparently david brent gets up people’s noses:

    ” As one member of the Hollywood Foreign Press told PopEater, “Ricky will not be invited back to host the show next year, for sure. [A]ny movie he makes he can forget about getting nominated. He humiliated the organization last night and went too far with several celebrities whose representatives have already called to complain.” ”

    aww, i feel so sorry for those celebs, poor dears.

    and this just in: judd apatow has challenged david brent to a duel at dawn.

    will it be pistols or swords, or just harsh – perhaps mildly amusing – language? (i’m hoping for some fencing action myself)

    i nominate kenny powers for referee.

    i put my money on brent either tricking gareth into standing in for him by proxy by appealing to gareth’s ego re: his ‘extensive military training’, or if that doesn’t fly brent doing a runner at the 9 second mark of the duel, only to laugh it off awkwardly later at the pub where he claims he and apatow are really the best of mates.

  16. christian says:

    To me giving ’em hell would be for Gervais to have declined hosting duties. Everybody wants it both ways.

  17. hcat says:

    C’mon after the first few times didn’t the presenters expect the slight roast that was coming and think of a quick jab back? I would have loved for Stallone to take the stage and say “I really feel a kinship for Ricky, our comedies make the same amount of money” or something of that nature. Carrel, Downey, and Hanks all were able to show their disapprovement in a lighthearted way. Shouldn’t we expect a little more from stars at a live event?

    Only thoughts are: Glad Kids got all that love, Dear Lord Emma Stone cleans up nice, Portman needs to work on an acceptance speech and I have begun to grow a near irrational hate for the cast of Glee.

  18. anghus says:

    yes, i’d like to ‘second’ my hatred of Glee.

    I tried watching the show on two separate occasions. I watched it once and just laughed at how awful i thought it was. Then i watched again at the behest of friends whose opinion i once respected.

    I found both experiences cringeworthy.

    Then i keep seeing them on award shows, and theyre always crying and making speeches about how surprising the success of the show is. After awhile, that line begins to feel played out. Yes, the phenomenal success of the show was surprising, a year ago. Now, after countless awards, articles, and constant coverage… it’s not. it’s not surprising at all. Who is surprised by Glee’s success at this point? Are the only people not paying attention to Glee’s success the cast of Glee?

    It’d be like Fincher winning Best Director at the Academy Awards this year and crying IM SO SHOCKED! Really? After winning every major critic award? After winning the Golden Globe? After being nominated for the award?

    So yeah, i hate Glee.

  19. Jeffrey Boam's Doctor says:

    In my wet dreams the Columbine killers visit the school of GLEE.

  20. IOv3 says:

    Really? Glee is that evil? Yeah we got two words for you Glee hating people… FUCK YOU! 😛

  21. Sergio says:

    The #1 difference between the Academy and the HFPA’s shows seems like it’s that one is clearly about celebrating The Work and the other is about working celebrities. I have utter disinterest in the latter and think that watching the telecast last night was a terrifying experience in that it made the shallowness of the award season uncomfortably real once again. I guess it’s nothing new. I like Downey. Thought Ricky should’ve been funnier. Then again, I’ve always found him a much better writer than performer. Why someone much better at the kind of banter RG likes to get into (like Sarah Silverman) hasn’t hosted a MAJOR (does anyone consider FIND one?) awards show is pretty stupid. But then again, Eddie Izzard was pitch perfect last year and went right over everyone’s heads. If you’re going to go there, then REALLY go there.

  22. Joe Straatmann says:

    The success of Glee means one thing for me: Someone somewhere is going to think about trying to re-launch Cop Rock.

  23. cadavra says:

    I think RP is onto something. If even half of the “big” stars simply declined to show up, the Globes would start that big bobsled ride to irrelevancy. Two or three years in a row and they’d be deader than the second weekend of a slasher film.

  24. Joe Leydon says:

    “In my wet dreams the Columbine killers visit the school of GLEE.”

    Curiously enough, the Columbine killers had similar dreams. Doctor, perhaps it’s time you go see a doctor.

  25. IOv3 says:

    Seriously David, go buy a new freaking Apple desktop, and get to posting some angry! COME ON, MAN! THE GLOBES NEED A REBUTTAL! A REBUTTAL!

  26. David Poland says:

    Actually, RP… skipped it. Was planning on going, but couldn’t stomach throwing on a tuxedo to walk around chumming it up after writing about the industry being complicit.

  27. Krillian says:

    I believe Glee is the highest-rated scripted network show in the 18-49 demo.

    Some of those high-schoolers are in their late 20’s. But I said the same thing watching Beverly Hills 90210.

  28. hcat says:

    But when the 90120 kids or 70’s show or whatever ensemble of late teens and early twenty somethings showed up at things they don’t act like its some Goddamn class trip. They act like they won a bingo game not an award.

    I have never seen the show, which feels like its been on for four seasons now given all the exposure they’ve had, so I can’t speak to its quality though I do know quite a few people who love it, but everytime any of these plucky ugly ducklings appear in front of a camera giddy with success they just make me cringe. But JBD does go too far.

  29. IOv3 says:

    The cast of Glee are far from ugly. Seriously, they are all pretty good looking for a supposed high school cast. Hell, if she doesn’t go too diva, you will all know Lea Michele in a few years because she’s going to be an epic level movie star.

  30. samguy says:

    All I can say about DeNiro’s attempt at stand up is that he’s no Rupert Pupkin.

    And as a gay man, I thought Gervais’ gay scientologist joke was fine. He was poking fun at the alleged supression of gays by that cult. Don’t be so overly sensitive that every time you hear gay you hear the ‘f’ word!

  31. Jeffrey Boam's Doctor says:

    Didn’t realise Columbine jokes are the ultimate threshold of peoples endurance for bad taste humour. I actually thought that was very funny juxtaposition. Maybe I do need help Joe.

  32. christian says:

    Maybe a week after another gun massacre is too soon for such refined wit, JBD.

  33. Triple Option says:

    Columbine joke worked for me. Surprised I’ve not heard anyone else go there. I thought Gervais was great from that monologue. I didn’t watch the show, so this is all I saw of it. Not sure how suprised I am by the list of winners cuz I’m not really sure what they were up against. I remember some funny nominees at least in terms of categories. I am curious to see Boardwalk Empire. I really felt like people would wet themselves over anything HBO puts out but I’d like to see it.

    What is Emma Stone’s natural hair color? I’ve seen photos of her w/various hair colors. I think she looks great as anything but blonde. Always great facial expressions. Hope she has a lasting career.

    Can’t say I care too much about award shows overall. I’ll check the winners mainly to help me guess for an Oscar pool I run at work, which is more about the pool than the actual subject matter. I would love to see Jeffry Ross host the Oscars. Even if it went 7 hours so he could have time to rip everybody, I’d still watch.

  34. Hallick says:

    I read somewhere that Emma Stone is naturally a blondie.

  35. Foamy Squirrel says:

    It’s on her IMDB entry (which OF COURSE is always accurate) – apparently she dyed it darker for Superbad and it stuck.

  36. Over here says:

    Thought Gervais nailed it, really. Why not roast the pile of over-exposed, over-paid, over-celebrated people at the Globes? Helps to differentiate this ceremony of little consequence from the Oscars.

  37. hcat says:

    That was my first thought upon seeing Stone at the Globes, ‘I want to find out her natural hair color, I REALLY REALLY want to find out her natural hair color.’

    (I know that was weak but Lex is gone and something had to be said)

  38. cadavra says:

    Well, as Gervais said, “It’s not 1975,” if you know what I mean.

  39. palmtree says:

    “This is the second shooting on or near an Los Angeles Unified school campus in as many days. On Tuesday, two students were wounded after a gun hidden in a backpack fired at Gardena High School.”

    With many shootings in the news, I agree that JBD crossed the line. Too soon…too soon…

  40. cadavra says:

    Another day, another school shooting, this one in Miami. Three dead, one of them possibly a U.S. Marshal.


  41. Paul MD (Stella's Boy) says:

    Looks like it wasn’t a school shooting. Officers were serving a warrant at someone’s home.

  42. cadavra says:

    Yes, apparently there’s a school nearby that was locked down, whence comes the confusion. Still, three dead is three dead, regardless of locale.

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