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David Poland

By David Poland

New Avengers Photos… AYOC! (Add Your Own Caption)

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10 Responses to “New Avengers Photos… AYOC! (Add Your Own Caption)”

  1. Pete B. says:

    First photo:

    Whedon: So… got any more pictures on your phone?
    ScarJo: Back off creepy!

    Second photo:

    Thor: By Odin’s beard, are those the Hulk’s balls?

    Cap: They look like two cantaloupe!

  2. anghus says:

    First One:

    Whedon: I’m sorry i keep staring at your breasts
    Scarjo: I’m sorry i keep staring at your forehead.

    i got nothing for the second one.

  3. scooterzz says:

    whedon: look! i can balance my head on the tip of my thumb!
    johansson: OMG! that’s amazing…when i worked for woody allen, i begged woody allen to try that but woody allen wouldn’t even try that…did i mention that i worked with woody allen?…

  4. yancyskancy says:

    Whedon: This is one of the few jobs that allows a bald schlub like me to be taken seriously by a beautiful woman.
    ScarJo: I thought I told you to leave me alone.

    Thor: Why is Black Widow on the roof?
    Cap: No idea. But I sure am enjoying that cameltoe.

  5. Foamy Squirrel says:

    Thor: Why are those people in the audience staring at us?
    Cap: I don’t know, are they expecting us to act or something?

  6. notwoz says:

    Thor: If I had a hammer …
    Cap: You do, ya big dolt!

  7. lateforwork says:

    Scarlett: Joss, I love acting in this film.

    Joss: You are doing such a great job.

    Captain: Are you?

    Thor: Am I what?

    Captain: Are you squinting your eyes? Squint, man!

  8. cadavra says:

    Whedon: You know, this part doesn’t really require any acting.
    ScarJo: Boy, that’s a relief.

    Thor: What is this giant beast doing here?
    Captain: Dude, you know how much this’ll add to the gross in Japan?

  9. Desslar says:

    Where’s the headgear? The Judge Dredd approach really undercuts the illusion.

  10. JJansen says:

    Thor: Is that Downey about to take a piss on us?
    Captain: I dunno, that guy never tells me anything.

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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon