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David Poland

By David Poland poland@moviecitynews.com

What About Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeent?

Review of Love
One hundred seventy two thousand frames in a movie
One thousand two hundred thirty cool camera pans
One hundred seventy two thousand frames in a movie
How do you measure the skills of Columbus, man?
(edited for bad math, thanks to Wrecktum)

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50 Responses to “What About Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeent?”

  1. Me says:

    I never wanted to see it as I don’t really like musicals, and this one seemed particularly dated (and already satirized by the Team America: World Police opening). Now that it sounds like it doesn’t work, I have even more ammunition to tell my girlfriend I’m not going.

  2. Wrecktum says:

    Two thousand eight hundred eighty frames is only two minutes. You should have stayed longer! Maybe it got better!!

  3. Paul Hackett says:

    I find it pretty interesting that Chris Columbus, the guy who has gotten raked over the coals over the years for staging his movies in super swanky homes that don’t really match his characters is the director of “Rent.” Spike Lee has been a bit uneven recently, but I’m willing to bet that he would have done a much better job.

  4. Scooba Steve says:

    My uncle and my cousin and her best friend,
    The gays and the straights and the whites and the spades,
    Everyone has AIDS!
    My Grandma and my dog, Old Blue,
    The Pope has got it and so do you,
    Come on everybody we’ve got quiltin’ to do!
    -Team America
    (I’m laughing just typing that stuff)

  5. David Poland says:

    My god, you’re right, Wreck… got math distracted…
    Going in for the rewrite…

  6. Blackcloud says:

    DP–Does this mean “Rent” isn’t the absolutely awful movie you saw a week or two ago and wouldn’t name?

  7. David Poland says:

    It was not. Rent is better than what I saw.

  8. dave l says:

    Is there any kind of timetable for when we can expect that revelation? November? December? Obviously it wasn’t that Wolf Creek thing…

  9. Bruce says:

    I wonder what the awful movie Dave saw.

  10. dave l says:

    Uh, welcome to the conversation Bruce, but that comment is about two hours late.

  11. Bruce says:

    I’d take the giant stick out of your ass, Dave L, but I think we’re all too late for that.

  12. dave l says:

    That doesn’t even make sense. So you’re saying I don’t have a stick up my ass? Thanks.

  13. Paul Hackett says:

    I’m guessing that it’s Get Rich or Die Tryin’, but who knows?

  14. The Premadator says:

    That would be a shame after Sheridan’s triumph with “In America.” I am very curious to what attracted him to the life of a gangster rapper. I’ll see the movie even if it means listening to all that awful music.

  15. The Premadator says:

    Apparently Mike Leigh is considering the long gestating Vanilla Ice bio-pic “Word To Ya Mutha.”

  16. dave l says:

    Poland loved In America too much to have such things to say about Sheridan’s next movie. He would have been sad, not savage.

  17. Mark Ziegler says:

    Vanilla Ice already had his life story done. Cool as Ice.

  18. Bruce says:

    The giant stick up your ass, dave l, has effected your reasoning power. Which is sad.

  19. I,Claudius says:

    Everyone should keep in mind that last year David Poland predicted The Phantom of the Opera would sweep the Oscars and just recently called Steve Martin’s cameo in Little Shop of Horrors “legendary.” I’m no Chris Columbus fan nor am I a Renthead, but Poland is about as reliable as the L.A. Times’ Kevin Thomas.

  20. PandaBear says:

    Anyone who predicted Phantom was going to be a contender had egg on their faces.

  21. The Premadator says:

    LOL Mark, it’s true! And he played himself!

  22. knowitall says:

    Well he happens to be spot on about that cameo of Steve martin’s in Little Shop of horrors. It’s brilliant!!!!
    The movie he is talking about is Freedomland… It’s garbage to the tenth power!

  23. knowitall says:

    Well he happens to be spot on about that cameo of Steve martin’s in Little Shop of horrors. It’s brilliant!!!!
    The movie he is talking about is Freedomland… It’s garbage to the tenth power!

  24. Stella's Boy says:

    Good call. With Joe Roth directing, Freedomland is a good possibility. Such a shame. I’m a huge fan of Richard Price.

  25. I,Claudius says:

    Calling Steve Martin’s cameo “brilliant” is one thing — an opinion — it is completely subjective. However, calling it “legendary” is the kind of absurd hyperbole for which David Poland is noted. Do you hear people talking about it in the same breath as Lillian Gish in The Wind, Brooks in Pandora’s Box or Brando and Leigh in Streetcar? Those performances are legendary, Martin’s is merely an amusing cameo.

  26. PandaBear says:

    Claudius what you got against DP? If you hate his work so much why are you wasting your time here?

  27. dave l says:

    That’s true, ‘legendary’ implies common agreement and consensus.

  28. Angelus21 says:

    Richard Price hasn’t translated into big screen greatness yet. Not his fault. His novels are great. His work on The Wire is also top notch.

  29. Crow T Robot says:

    Re: Martin and Murray in “Little Shop”…
    The sadist vs the masochist.
    Comic perfection baby.

  30. joefitz84 says:

    Rent belongs on the stage. I can’t see it translating well. And it looks like I’m right on.

  31. LesterFreed says:

    Mr Martin was legendary in The Jerk. Not some cameo.

  32. Mark Ziegler says:

    Freedomland did move into 2006. The dumping zone. Jan/Feb.

  33. BluStealer says:

    I was really hoping that Rent would be great.m I was so looking forward to it. My top film of the winter season.

  34. James Leer says:

    Did anyone else see the “Munich” trailer in front of “Jarhead” today? I certainly wasn’t expecting it and it doesn’t seem to be online yet. Looks great!

  35. Sanchez says:

    That has a trailer already?

  36. Crow T Robot says:

    James!
    Holy shit! Speak, damn you, speak!
    Compare it to the “Syriana” trailer for me.
    a) too much like it
    b) very much like it
    c) sort of like it
    d) nothing like it
    Looks like I’m going to see the movie attached to the Munich trailer tonight folks.

  37. James Leer says:

    Actually, it was the trailer right after the “Syriana” trailer for me, so I was definitely struck by the similarity. I would call them very similar (in a good, “hey the winter movies are smart this year” way) but the “Munich” trailer is definitely focused more on the Bana character and what the spiritual cost is of becoming an assassin. Most of the other actors are briefly glimpsed…I think Geoffrey Rush has one shot and Daniel Craig’s Blue Eyes are in two.

  38. Bruce says:

    How is Munich even close to Syriana or am I missing something?

  39. James Leer says:

    I’d say it’s less the movies than the trailers, though both movies are gunning for the winter prestige slot by offering history lessons, global intrigue, and desaturated cinematography a la “Traffic” (although more so in the case of “Syriana”).
    I am surprised that the official site for “Munich” is not even online yet. I can describe what I remember from the trailer (though I’ll be paraphrasing a lot):
    It starts with actual news footage from the Olympics massacre and a newscaster saying “They’re all dead.”
    What follows are a lot of shots of Golda Meir (who is playing her, BTW? I didn’t recognize the actress) and Committee X deciding their course of action.
    Shots of Bana with his family, in bed with his wife, etc.
    Meeting Geoffrey Rush. Rush details the duties of the other assassins in Bana’s team, including Daniel Craig.
    A first assassination where Bana is in a hotel room (this is the scene from the poster) and has to flash a lamp on and off to give the OK signal to his team (outside the hotel) to kill. You can see him wrestle with the implications of this simple act.
    Someone speaks about the curious nature of a man taking on the mantle of “assassin.”
    More violence, etc.
    Another assassination about to be carried out, Bana has to call the target to see if he is in the location, but his young daughter answers, freaking him out.
    Bana calls home so his wife and daughter can hear his voice…I forget how it’s phrased, but he says it like the man they knew might not ever be coming back home.
    And just as the trailer gets cooking, it finishes. Spielberg never gives away too much in a trailer.

  40. Hopscotch says:

    Which theater James Leer? Was it in LA?

  41. James Leer says:

    Yeah, AMC in Burbank, but I’m pretty sure Universal attached this and “King Kong” to “Jarhead,” so other theaters probably have it, too.

  42. Hopscotch says:

    Probably so, every once in awhile you’ll hear that some prints have “such and such” trailers and others don’t. But this is LA, where studios definitely make sure the right trailers accompany the right films.
    But shouldn’t we be dissing Rent on this strand? I have zero desire to see it. I think it’ll be a serious flop. If the reviews are unanimously lame (like Phantom of the Opera) the core base will stay away.

  43. Crow T Robot says:

    You’re one of the good ones Leer. I’m actually heading to the AMC 16 tonight. What are the chances, hey? Thanks again pal.

  44. James Leer says:

    Hey Crow, I saw it at the smaller AMC 6 there. The one near the Media Center. Just a heads-up.

  45. Sanchez says:

    Just from your description of the trailer I can’t wait to see it.

  46. dave l says:

    I was deprived, not playing at the Vista. Have to download it now.

  47. joefitz84 says:

    I didn’t have it either. MCN get it online.

  48. BluStealer says:

    Rent turned into Munich. Will Eric Bana sing?

  49. combat_wombat says:

    Here’s the Munich trailer… not very high quality but for those who can’t wait.
    http://www.munichmovie.com/munich_trlr1_300k.mov

  50. KamikazeCamelV2.0 says:

    To Me (er, Me being the first person who replies, and is called Me – ugh, you’re a horrible person Me… AAGH), if you go into a musical thinking full well that you dislike musicals of course you won’t like it.
    But hold your own opinions. Just cause Dave didn’t like it doesn’t me nobody else will.

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