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David Poland

By David Poland poland@moviecitynews.com

Death Is The Ultimate Disinfectant

Don’t get me wrong. I am sad for and respectful of the pain of any loss of life. And losing a fight with cancer is one of those losses that is particularly hard, as one watches their loved one eaten away from the inside.
But the re-humanization of Farrah marks a spectacular comeback from more than a decade of bad public behavior and questions about mental health.
Anyone who doubts America’s facility for reinvention and acceptance need look no further.
What I fear is that this indicates that we will be investing a great deal of media time feeling Audriana Partridge ( or whatever current US Mag cover bikini) and her pains some 30 years from now, somehow forgetting that her primary public accomplishment is as a figure of teen masturbation and the inspiration of eating disorders and bad romantic choices.
I know. I am a jerk for not bowing to the new perception of Cancer Farrah. And I honestly do sympathize with the family’s pain. But really… how did this become OUR pain? Especially when, in this industry, so many who have done so much more pass on with so much less attention paid.
(I suppose it doesn’t help that I am creeped out by an auction in my hotel of Ann Miller’s and Bob Hope’s relatively recently passed along stuff, plus the ongoing bloodsucking of Marilyn and Elvis, including Elvis’ prescription bottles being sold by the scumbag doctor who so clearly helped Elvis die via overprescribing.)
May Farrah rest in peace… in private.

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24 Responses to “Death Is The Ultimate Disinfectant”

  1. mutinyco says:

    Anybody else remember in Mad Magazine when they merged Farrah and Arafat to create Farrafat? And the picture was Farrah in a swimsuit with a beard and turban…

  2. mutinyco says:

    I think that was in the same issue with Prince Charles Manson and Lady Die.

  3. Wrecktum says:

    It’s part and parcel with the continued soap-operafication of our national discourse. Just this week we’ve got the fade-to-black reconcilation of Ryan and Farrah, the ongoing delightfully dysfunctional Jon and Kate (plus 8!) and the fall from grace (but possible redemption!) of Mark Sanford. Maybe a little blonde girl will be slaughtered tomorrow to carry us into the weekend!
    The U.S. media is a telenovela. There’s always been that aspect to it, but now it’s tranformation is complete.

  4. Blackcloud says:

    “What I fear is that this indicates that we will be investing a great deal of media time feeling Audriana Partridge . . .”
    Is Patridge (I think that’s the right spelling) even 1/10 as well known as Farrah Fawcett? A celebrity like her is a dime a dozen these days. Farrah Fawcett was an icon. You may have a fair point, but you need a better example for your comparison. And by better I mean, someone who isn’t a nobody.

  5. LexG says:

    Audrina Partridge’s new Carl’s Jr commercial is AWESOME. HUGE fan.

  6. yancyskancy says:

    Of course Farrah’s pain became OUR pain when it was packaged as a prime-time special. I didn’t see it, but I believe the justification was the usual “reality check.” Just in case we don’t all know we’re gonna die someday. I heard it was nicely done, but still.
    Not that it matters, but that gal’s name is Audrina Patridge. I’ll wager that 98% of those who have heard of her think her last name is Partridge, but it’s not. If I didn’t enjoy The Soup so much, I’d stop watching just so I could say I’ve never heard of her and her “reality” show friends. I might watch a prime-time special about Spencer Pratt’s dying days, if they could get get it on the air by July.

  7. LexG says:

    Spencer owns.

  8. yancyskancy says:

    Lex: Forgot about the Carl’s commercial. Maybe she has a purpose on this earth after all.

  9. yancyskancy says:

    Yes, Spencer owns the most annoying personality in the history of broadcast entertainment. But I’ll admit his clips on The Soup have given me lots of laughs and some most appreciated feelings of superiority.

  10. LexG says:

    And apparently I’m such a huge fan that even *I* didn’t know it was Patridge. Shit, who knew? No one, apparently.
    Semi on topic, I assume Entertainment Tonight is milking this for the entire half-hour, every single day? Just as they did Anna Nicole for nearly a year?
    ET was always pretty cheesy, but remember it used to have some fun junket stuff in the days before that EPK stuff was so common everywhere else? And Maltin there to give some cred?
    Everyone hates on TMZ, but that show (and site) is so goofy, genteel and silly… Sure, maybe it contributes to some of the things DP is talking about, but ET is just plain vile and exploitive. I’ll take Harvey, Max, and the CUTE GLASSES CHICK WHO SITS NEXT TO MAX THE SURFER *any* day of the week over the sanctimonious ET.

  11. The Big Perm says:

    Ew, maybe it’s me but using the word “disinfectant” when discussing a dead body is pretty gross. Although apt, I guess.

  12. Wrecktum says:

    Audrina Patridge is very hot. I usually pay no attention to skeevy reality show tramps, but she’s a stunner.

  13. Blackcloud says:

    Who is she, anyway? I’ve heard the name, but I have no idea what she does or why she’s famous. Besides being attractive, which I assume she is from Lex’s figurative drooling.

  14. LexG says:

    INTO THE BLUE 2!
    (And THE HILLS.)

  15. christian says:

    So what has she done?

  16. LexG says:

    Chris Pine, apparently.

  17. Wrecktum says:

    /rimshot

  18. Joe Leydon says:

    David’s comments may be, uh, a trifle less than diplomatic — but they’re undeniably fair. Actually, as I wrote on my own blog today:
    Now probably is not the time to discuss her inability to parlay her initial burst of fame into a sustained film career. In all fairness, it must be acknowledged that when she actually had worthy material with which to work — The Burning Bed, Extremities — she acquitted herself respectably. Still, I think it

  19. NickF says:

    Michael Jackson is gone in the same day?

  20. Jesus, only TMZ is the source on Jackson’s death. I’d like a confirmation from at least one other outlet asap before I start weeping like a girl.

  21. jeffmcm says:

    LA Times is confirming it. RIP.

  22. Wrecktum says:

    The toxicology report will be priceless.

  23. anghus says:

    That headline seems more appropriate for Michael Jackson.
    I was watching Headline News and the sidebar said
    MICHAEL JACKSON DEAD
    – Started Performing at Age 5
    – Acquitted of Child Molestation in 2005
    I think there was more inbetween.

  24. Triple Option says:

    Farrah was definitely an icon, though. Go to any dive bar w/a clientele between the age of 45 and 60 and you

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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon