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David Poland

By David Poland poland@moviecitynews.com

Box Office Hell

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21 Responses to “Box Office Hell”

  1. SJRubinstein says:

    Go “The Messengers!!!” Baby needs a new pair of water moccasins!

  2. Josh Massey says:

    I honestly can’t remember wanting to see a movie less than Because I Said So. Not Epic Movie, not RV, not Little Man
    … OK, maybe Little Man.

  3. LYT says:

    Because I Said So isn’t good, but it’s certainly better than Epic Movie.
    But then, so’s a visit to the dentist.

  4. jeffmcm says:

    And better for you.

  5. Jonj says:

    “Pan’s” is going on more than 1,000 screens. It might perform better than expected this week. “Epic Movie” should implode in its second week.

  6. I had no idea that The Messengers was that movie by the Pang brothers about that scarecrow! I wanted to see that movie at one stage.

  7. EDouglas says:

    Kamikaze, I don’t remember a scarecrow in the movie… though there are lots of crows… a scarecrow would have been a good idea.

  8. jeffmcm says:

    There hasn’t been a good killer scarecrow movie in a long time,if ever (I’m not counting Batman Begins).

  9. jeffmcm says:

    There hasn’t been a good killer scarecrow movie in a long time,if ever (I’m not counting Batman Begins).

  10. Goulet says:

    Because I Said So is one of the worst fucking movies I’ve ever seen. That’s that.

  11. EDouglas says:

    “Because I Said So is one of the worst fucking movies I’ve ever seen.”
    Yup… I wish I stuck around for the rest of it so I could have trashed it, but it was my day back from Sundance and I just couldn’t take it.

  12. MattM says:

    The problem with BISS is two-fold:
    1. Throwaway bits wind up being funnier than the main characters’ plotline. Unsurprisingly, Lauren Graham hits every joke right on the head, especially in her couple of scenes with Tony Hale, and with the exception of the massage scene, the stuff between the sisters and mother are decent.
    2. They couldn’t decide what the main plot was. Was it “Keaton learns to unclench!” or “Mandy finds true luv!” Shoulda picked on and stuck with it.
    Also, isn’t Gabriel Macht completely unnecessary as an actor, given that he’s a poor man’s Josh Lucas, who is a poor man’s McConaugher?

  13. Josh Massey says:

    Wow, “a poor man’s Josh Lucas?” If that’s not a supreme insult to an actor, I don’t know what is.

  14. ED and Jeff, I destinctly remember there being a movie made that was called The Scarecrow or something like that and I’m pretty sure it was the Pang Brothers with Dylan McDermott. Maybe they had to change it?
    I dunno. Scarecrows can be scary.

  15. EDouglas says:

    Yeah, I do remember it being called The Scarecrow at one point, too, but then maybe they realized there wasn’t a scarecrow in the movie and changed the title?
    Looks like I was low on Messengers, probably about right on Because I Said So… Smoking Aces, Epic Movie and Catch and Release all tanked this weekend.

  16. Joe Leydon says:

    EDougles: You used a colorful turn of phrase on another thread, but I can’t find it. Something to do with guys grabbing their crotches while typing snarky comments on-line?

  17. Jonj says:

    This isn’t the thread for this, but “The Astronaut Farmer” with Billy Bob Thornton looks like the movie that will define everything that’s wrong with movies today. It looks absolutely dreadful, at least judging by the trailer, which seems to pretty much sum up the entire movie.

  18. jeffmcm says:

    It’ll still be better than Northfork.

  19. OMG, have you guys seen the trailer for Julie Taymor’s Across the Universe? It looks… amazing. Now that is a movie that I have to see on the big screen. Of course, it could be a disaster, or it could be a masterpiece.
    I captured a whole bunch of stills if you just wanna stare are the purdy images. Click my name. The trailer is there too, or go to the MCN page.

  20. EDouglas says:

    Jonj: I really liked Astronaut Farmer. (Shut up, jeffmcm )

  21. jeffmcm says:

    Astronaut Farmer looks like it could be heartfelt and charming, possible. I will give Billy Bob Thornton credit for being smart about most of his choices of projects.
    But Northfork was unredeemed garbage.

Quote Unquotesee all »

It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon