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David Poland

By David Poland

BYOB – Gone Bermuda-in'

I’ll spend some time online, but try not to overdo it. After all, it’s the boy’s first trip on his new passport.
Be nice to each other. Back to the regular schedule in a couple of weeks…

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57 Responses to “BYOB – Gone Bermuda-in'”

  1. leahnz says:

    aw, cool pic
    (there’s something both adorable and a bit weird- looking about teeny tiny wee baby shoes smooshed onto the end of chubby baby cankles, like thumbs wearing shoes)

  2. The Pope says:

    That picture is a great smile.
    But I have to ask, is the little man going to do a 30 minute interview anytime soon?

  3. Aladdin Sane says:

    Great pic.

  4. Biscuits says:

    Nice pic. Out of curiosity — what camera are you using?

  5. torpid bunny says:

    Wait a second, Josh Duhamel and Timothy Olyphant are two different people?

  6. torpid bunny says:

    I’m just distressed because I was always surprised that Duhamel could do likeably sleazy and menacing at the same time in Girl Next Door. Thought he didn’t have that much range. I guess not.

  7. Eric says:

    Passports for babies are great. The federal rules for the photos state that a person’s head has to take up a certain portion of the frame, so the photographer has to zoom in much more when shooting an infant. The result is a passport photo that makes the baby look enormous next to everyone else’s photo.

  8. Stella's Boy says:

    No you are right, Duhamel doesn’t have much range since it’s Olyphant in Girl Next Door. Can’t wait for Justified tonight.

  9. Rob says:

    This is, like, the ninth place on the internet where someone has mentioned confusing Josh Duhamel and Timothy Olyphant. Is that a Paxton/Pullman, McDermott/Mulroney thing now?
    Olyphant is a little older, sexier/more interesting looking, a MUCH better actor, and hasn’t contracted herpes from Fergie.
    FYI, while we’re talking heartthrobs, I loved Noah’s piece on the now-underrated Jude Law. Blame tabloid overexposure I guess, but he’s still one of the most exciting actors to show up in the last 15 years. Love him in Huckabees, Closer, Ripley, and Gattaca.

  10. Hopscotch says:

    Don’t have HBO, can’t watch The Pacific. Drat.
    However, I have been following this story where the right wing web sites claim that Hanks called our WWII troops racist.
    My site has a big blog post on it if you want to read more.
    I see it as a classic “take a comment out of context and generate fake-RAGE over it”, but you might have a different opinion. Check it out.

  11. Stella's Boy says:

    Green Zone and Tom Hanks have the righties throwing fits. They must be ready to spontaneously combust when they think about all of the anti-war propaganda out there now. Clearly Spielberg and Hanks hate the troops and hate America, even more than Greengrass and Damon do. Clearly there is no ambiguity whatsoever when it comes to WWII and Iraq. They are simple, black and white issues, as all wars are.

  12. Direwolf says:

    I posted this in the Avatar profits thread with no response. Probably means no interest but thought I’d try again.
    I saw Alice 3D yesterday in Evanston at Cinemakr’s Centruty Theaters. It was a matinee but the cost was still the full evening price of $14. $6.75 is the normal matinee price.
    Is this the case all over the country for 3-D? If so, could the upcharge impact actually be more than the widely quoted $3.50 which just compares the stated ticket price to the 3-D ticket price? All those adults going to matinees with their kids are really paying $7.25 more, at least in this market.
    Just curious, not maligning 3D grosses.

  13. anghus says:

    Of course they were racist. My grandfather fought in the pacific during ww2 and he had an immense dislike for the japanese his entire life. “Dont trust the Japanese!” He’d say with a sour look on his face.
    Of course he felt that way. He spent 3 years being shot at by the japanese and watching people around him die at their hands.
    They were taught to hate them and trained to kill them. We made cartoons portraying them as buck toothed bufoons. To even claim they are racist is in a traditional sense is ridiculous. Racism is about irrational fear.
    Being shot at by an enemy trained to kill you can hardly be considered ‘irrational’. Their fears were very rational.
    So, yes, many of the soldiers in the military were bigots, but can you blame them? Can you teach a generation of young men to kill the japanese, to dehumanize the japanese, to foster a hatred towards them so that killing them in battle would not be questioned and expect them to not be racist?

  14. rossers says:

    An interesting aspect that “The Pacific” is exploring is the guilt that those who stayed home felt. Another interesting dimension of this are the Japanese who were in the United States and chose (or were perhaps influenced by a certain degree of “Mom-ism”) not to fight. The full ramifications of this are discussed in John Okada’s “No No Boy”.
    Can anyone find that Dr. Seuss cartoon portraying the stereotypical “buck toothed Japanese”?
    What are people’s feelings on the Intro episode to the Pacific? That night battle was incredible, but a lot of the characters felt rehashed or far too explicitly characterized. I’m gonna watch all of it and love it I’m sure, but I had a few problems with that first episode. (I’m really hoping the “A History of Violence” kid gets knocked off soon, I’m really not enjoying his performance)

  15. Foamy Squirrel says:

    Direwolf – judging by the lack of response to the original comment it’s likely that no-one really knows the widespread practice (although I’m surprised there aren’t more obligatory “Well, at MY local theatre…” responses).
    I’m guessing that it’s likely to vary location-to-location, as there’s no way distributors can ever legally hold theaters to a given price point (just like they have no legal control over the price Walmart etc. set for DVDs). However, as covered numerous times in the various “3D Bump” threads, the number of matinee/discounted/kids/whatever tickets aren’t counted in any meaningful way in general. This makes comparing kid-centric fare like Shrek to adult-centric fare like Return of the King a headache on anything other than pure grosses, let alone factoring in an inconsistent 3D price premium. Heck, there’s places that run “Dollar Theatre” sessions so it could go the other way as well – so the $3.50 3D figure is nothing more than a (educated) guess at the average premium (kinda like the fact that the average American has 1 testicle, but you’re unlikely to find many people who fit that description exactly).

  16. Ray_Pride says:

    HBO has the first episode of THE PACIFIC free online.

  17. Nick Rogers says:

    Here’s my obligatory response, then. I can’t speak to “Alice” specifically (haven’t yet seen it), but when I saw “Coraline” in 3D at a weekday matinee last year, the 3D surcharge was added to the regular matinee price.

  18. Direwolf says:

    Thanks, Nick and Foamy.
    On Pacific, I watched the first episode and found it a bit boring mostly because I found it hard to tell soldiers apart. I suspect that will pass as the players become more familiar through repetition.

  19. Yegan says:

    First trip on his new passport. Wow… now he’s a jetsetter.

  20. Jeffrey Boam's Doctor says:

    Love that photo. When I first glimpsed it I thought it was someones fingers with shoes on. Looks like the work of a canon DSLR. Have some family fun in the sun DP.

  21. christian says:


  22. hcat says:

    Just looked up more on Justified to see if I should tune in tonight and found out its an Elmore Leonard charecter. I loved the two books he was in with Riding the Rap being his second best book of the nineties (only outdone by Out of Sight). Now I’m counting the minutes. Glad I didn’t learn about this last week, the wait would have been unbearable.

  23. Whois67 says:

    “I saw Alice 3D yesterday in Evanston at Cinemakr’s Centruty Theaters. It was a matinee but the cost was still the full evening price of $14. $6.75 is the normal matinee price.
    Is this the case all over the country for 3-D? If so, could the upcharge impact actually be more than the widely quoted $3.50 which just compares the stated ticket price to the 3-D ticket price? All those adults going to matinees with their kids are really paying $7.25 more, at least in this market.”
    At an empire theaters (in Canada), the matinee is $10.99 and the evening showing is $14.50
    for other non 3d it’s $7.99 matinee, $11.50 evening.

  24. aris says:

    I admire Tina Fey and Steve Carrell, and love their respective shows, and think they are both very good on those shows. However, does anyone else look at the Date Night trailer and see Michael Scott and Liz Lemon? I just can’t see past those characters, especially for Carrell, as I thought even Get Smart was a slight variation on the Scott character. While this film might make some decent amount of coin, what do they do next? How long before the repeated retreads get tired for THEM, let alone us?

  25. Nick Rogers says:

    Carell has not had a good lead role in a film since his first one, and his last palatable movie of any sort was “Little Miss Sunshine.”

  26. hcat says:

    Nick- Dan in Real Life was a great movie, it turned a bit sitcomish but there was strong undercurrent of pain in his portrayal that is usually absent in studio comedies.
    Date Night looks like nothing more than the Out of Towners with gangsters but 40 year old virgin was nothing but American Pie fast forwarded a few years.
    And I saw Justified and it was the best Leonard adaption since HOMBRE. I don’t watch much TV but this is along with Mad Men is required viewing with a big glass of Whiskey.

  27. LexG says:

    Back to screenwriting.

  28. Stella's Boy says:

    Looks like there’s going to be a whole lot of major crime in small-town Kentucky. I really enjoyed it though. Perfect role for Olyphant, good supporting cast, snappy dialogue and a strong adversary for Givens.
    The Date Night spot I saw last night was pretty lame, much like everything I’ve seen so far. It does look like Michael and Liz Got Married, but worse. Dan in Real Life did nothing for me. I found it mostly unbearable.

  29. LexG says:

    DAN IN REAL LIFE is whatever whatever but it DOES supply a GREAT role for my main motherfucker DANE COOK, totally disarming and likable and AWESOME, not surprising since he’s THE FUNNIEST MAN ON EARTH and *the coolest, nicest comic EVER*, all FRIENDLY AND COOL AND SUPPORTIVE to fellow comics, unlike those coffeehouse poseurs you guys usually frost yourself over from the Tenacious Oswalt Thompkins Galafickafuckbag crew, any or all of whom can eat a dick while LORD DANE collects his ENDS and STOMPS ON THEM with his superior jokes and HOTTER CHICK FANBASE while Patton LeadsingerofAcceptWalt does his jokes about fucking GRAVY or whatever and ALL NOT BEING FRIENDLY. FUCK PATTON ASSWALT. ANY ONE OF YOU could write his asshole material.

  30. LexG says:

    OH YEAH, when Patton SMARMYASSHOLEWALT *ever* does a movie where he’s a straight-legit romantic lead opposite some WOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD CLASS TANGBOX like K-HUD, J-ALBA or J-SIMPS, give me a call.
    Otherwise you hipsterfucks can talk up that Cro-Magnon Carvell Ice Cream joking rat-voiced foodie and his jank-ass smugster material, all RUDE AS FUCK and condescending…. while MASTER DANE runs the world with his jokes about VAG and BEING AWESOME and MAKING MOVIES and BEING IN TORQUE.
    Was PATTON DOWNSWALT in TORQUE? Unless they had a CORKY GANG, I think not.

  31. Stella's Boy says:

    How about a direct-to-DVD/OnDemand sequel to Funny People starring LexG and Dane Cook?

  32. Nick Rogers says:

    hcat: I know a lot of people who liked “Dan in Real Life,” but for me, the only undercurrent of pain was in watching so many talented people in front of, and behind, the camera, slog their way through something so overly sentimental and sappy. I like Carell despite what I’d call a spate of bad, if marginally profitable, choices (“Evan Almighty” aside on the latter), and I’m looking forward to “Dinner for Schmucks” this summer.
    Lex: As a cinematic evocation of Red Bull, I’ll give you “Torque,” but you can take Dane Cook. Please.

  33. I like the bit in Date Night trailer where the people act so disgusted that they took the other people’s table. That bit amuses me. That is all.

  34. Chucky in Jersey says:

    “The Ghost Writer” goes national on Friday but you may have to drive a ways to see it. AMC apparently has banned the movie over Roman Polanski’s legal troubles.

  35. movieman says:

    Not sure whether this is on anyone’s radar or not, but “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” is a very pleasant surprise. It’s a bit like the mid-’80s John Hughes teen flicks if Hughes had made a movie set in middle school instead of high school. And “Wimpy” doesn’t overstay its welcome, clocking in at a fleet 92 minutes. I actually wouldn’t mind seeing a sequel: the characters are appealing enough that it might be a kick revisiting them sometime in the future.
    “Repo Men,” however, is just terrible. I was hoping for a style-over-substance actioner in the tradition of “Wanted,” but it’s really just a muddled, deeply unpleasant, pretentious mess. Guess that makes it three Universal flops in a row (four if you count “Leap Year” which should really gone out via Focus).

  36. movieman says:

    “…should HAVE really gone out via Focus.”

  37. Stella's Boy says:

    If Repo Men is significantly worse than the reprehensible Wanted, it must be one of the worst movies ever made.

  38. jeffmcm says:

    I thought Lex was retiring his ‘persona’. What a surprise that he’s reverted to doing the same old thing!

  39. Geoff says:

    Dane Cook is a loser, probably the most overrated comic of recent years – I tried to watch his special on HBO. It was basically 20 minutes of jokes padded and spread out to 90 minutes. And no, I have no love for Patton Oswalt, either.
    Chris Rock and Eddie Izzard are the current gods of standup comedy and no one even comes close. Though wow, Izzard was awful at the Independent Spirits.
    That said, Dane Cook was his best in Dan in Real Life – the piano playing scene is about the only time I have ever laughed out loud at anything he did. He does a very good job of mixing the comedy and drama. I like the movie, it defines the word CHARMING, but wow….that family was just a bit much. They do morning calesthenics together every morning, NEVER have the TV on, play crossword races, do a talent contest….what is this, the Osmonds??? I enjoyed the movie overall, but that element just bugged me – there is no family like that on the planet, sorry.
    My birthday was last week – I turned the big 35 – and my wife got me an awesome gift, my first BluRay! Very excited, it just looks amazing on a 42″ LCD. But my issues is that I do NOT want to double-dip – it’s tough because I had just bought District 9 and Hurt Locker on DVD a couple of months ago and would love to have them on BluRay – any tips on whether it’s worth the double-dip?
    So far, I’m just purchasing movies at discounts that I do not have on DVD – I got 28 Days Later (which sounded amazing) and The Fugitive.
    Any suggestions for catalog BluRay purchases are welcome. I almost got Robocop the other day.

  40. Nick Rogers says:

    Geoff: You nailed it with the description of the phony family, a screenwriter’s invention if there ever was one. Dane Cook has made me laugh once, too, although not in “Dan,” but in “Waiting …,” with a disdainful remark toward Justin Long.

  41. movieman says:

    I quite enjoyed “Wanted,” SB. Maybe because I wasn’t a fan of Bekmambetov’s “Watch” movies, but “Wanted” exceeded my expectations by delivering plenty of turbo-charged action in an uber-stylized package. I even found James McAvoy’s (vocal) Tom Cruise imitation more amusing than annoying (unlike, say, Christian Bale’s tiresome Charlie Sheen “soundalike” routine).
    “Repo Men” is truly cretinous, though. The only thing that could have made it even more of an endurance test to sit through is a “Game”-y Gerard Butler.

  42. Eric says:

    Congrats on the Blu-ray player, Geoff. I just finished building a theater in my basement and have since been enjoying the Blu-rays I’d been buying but waiting to watch on my new big screen.
    Like you, I try not to buy anything on Blu-ray that I already own on DVD. (But I made a conscious choice to stop buying most DVD a few years ago when it was clear a new format was on the way, which leaves me with plenty of options.)
    The Godfather remasters are great, as is Dark Knight and all of the Pixar films. The Criterion black and white movies (e.g. Third Man, 400 Blows, Wages of Fear) are supposed to be gorgeous, although I haven’t gotten around to seeing them myself yet.

  43. hcat says:

    (four if you count “Leap Year” which should really gone out via Focus)
    I’m curious why you thought Leap Year would be a focus film, is it just due to its smaller budget? They don’t always hit it out of the park but they often aim higher than a by the numbers romantic comedy.

  44. EthanG says:

    The poster shot of Carell’s head in a stack of pancakes sums up the syrupy sentimentality of “Dan” nicely for me. The only highlight for me was watching Amy Ryan do an astounding 180 shift from “Gone Baby Gone” which I had seen 2 days before.

  45. Tim DeGroot says:

    Geoff – I haven’t seen the RoboCop Blu-ray, but I gather it’s fashionably desaturated and high-contrast like Fox/MGM’s 2007 DVD. Hopefully Criterion will release their edition of RoboCop on Blu.

  46. yancyskancy says:

    Louis CK is my current fave stand-up. Lex, if you’re still there, surely he’s a fave of yours, too? I just watched his “Chewed Up” for the third time (it’s on Netflix instant watch) and I’m looking forward to checking out his other specials.

  47. EthanG says:

    God bless Bill Pohlad…who is pretty much the only reason Terence Malick still can make movies (and also bailed out the Valerie Plame movie and Fair Game) for financing PT Anderson’s new film, which Universal dropped like a hot potato all of a sudden, probably due to recent box office struggles.

  48. movieman says:

    …the modest budget, the Irish setting (and accents), Matthew Goode, Anand Tucker, Adams’ previous forays in Focus-type fare (“Sunshine Cleaning,” “Doubt,” “Miss Pettigrew,” etc.): it all just seemed very boutique-ish.
    I also happen to think that “Leap Year” was unfairly lambasted by (most of the) critics. I thought it was a minor pleasure, and certainly better than your average January fare. Just compare it with last year’s execrable “Bride Wars” (or this year’s “Spy Next Door”).

  49. LexG says:

    Also: REMEMBER ME = UNDERRATED. Pattinson’s got the goods. Also thought Brosnan was better in it than he was in Ghost Writer.
    Come to think of it, I liked Remember Me BETTER than Ghost Writer.
    GHOST WRITER would’ve benefited from some JIGSAW STYLE WHOOSH FLASHBACKS AT THE END, because the “big reveal” seems so 1979 BBC and underwhelming, and my ADD dumb ass wanted a TOTAL LITERALIZATION, SAW IV STYLE, of what that meant for each previous incident in the movie.
    Also, wouldn’t have hurt Polanski to dial down the scope a little; WAY too unbelievable and cartoonish to have Brosnan basically AS TONY BLAIR, involved in all this low-level sordid shit. It’s like ABSOLUTE POWER with the PRESIDENT being at the center of some 10-cent mystery. Why not make Brosnan just some hapless cabinet member?
    GHOST WRITER is like making a movie about THE LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD, only it’s set in suburban Ohio and he’s taking on an Off Track Betting ring and giving PRESS CONFERENCES on some rainy backroad. SO phony.
    And near the end an event occurs that would be one of the MOST SHOCKING THINGS IN THE HISTORY OF THE PLANET, and it’s set in a locale so underwhelming and bogus, it’s like the Oscars in THE BODYGUARD where ROBERT WUHL was hosting.

  50. Hopscotch says:

    Leap Year was completely financed by Spyglass, and released by Uni. On same note, I know there are many stories going on about Green Zone causing huge losses for Universal, but that was an equal Working Title production. Was it split 50-50? Beats me, but it’s worth asking.
    Stand ups: Louis CK’s Shameless is one of the great stand up albums ever. Chewed Up is also funny, but not quite to that level. I love Patton Oswalt too, but even he stretches some jokes too long. I love Demetri Martin’s sense of humor.
    Rock’s last stand-up special was easily his worst. A friend of mine made a really harsh comment when watching it. He said, “I think Obama’s success went to Chris Rock’s head.” BAM! I don’t entirely disagree. Bring the Pain, Bigger and Blacker are still amazing, but yeah, he hasn’t quite have that same edge anymore.
    Cook is very funny if you’re under 25 and aren’t that familiar with stand up. The more stand up you’re familiar with the more you hate Cook.

  51. LexG says:

    Wow, slow night on here, but….
    What a nice, sweet, disarming, clearly decent, smart, classy, head-on-her-shoulders young woman. Adorable beyond belief, but so CLEARLY a great, smart, intelligent young woman, just utterly charming and AWESOME and SO unpretentious, unguarded and FUN.
    For whatever the common logic is about kid stars, every once in a while the planets align and we get someone who so clearly is going to be HUGE for years to come– Jodie Foster, Kurt Russell, Gosling, K-Stew, DiCaprio, Barrymore…
    I’d put money down that decades on Fanning will be still RUNNING this town, winning Oscars and producing and even directing.

  52. Eldrick says:

    so can we agree that armond White is the most gangsta film critic ever? his review of Greenburg? WOW! he went in hard( pause)on damn near everyone.
    troll or not, (still not sure what he is), he can aim those guns.

  53. LYT says:

    Crying racism and lynching doesn’t seem especially gangsta to me (if racism is such a problem for Armond, how come he’s one of the few film critics in America left with a full-time job, and chairman of the NY Film Critics to boot?). More like the kind of whiny victim mentality he decries in almost everyone else.

  54. Jeremy B says:

    On the commentary track for _Push_, they admit that one of the scenes only exists because one of the actors complained that he didn’t have any scenes with Fanning.

  55. Eldrick says:

    LYT, yeah he could have left that part out, though he would know more than me since i have no clue about the yupiie NY elitist club. Of course I dont c/s everything he said, but it was a fun read. Hoberman still hasnt recovered.

  56. Hopscotch says:

    Fess Parker passed away.
    His Davy Crockett was fixture in my house hold as a kid. He was my hero as a kid.

  57. Bob Violence says:

    It’s worth recalling that the entire White/Greenburg thing began, in some sense, with that day in the ’90s when White went on Leonard Lopate’s WNYC show and accused Georgia Brown of saying black people shouldn’t be allowed to make movies. Brown called in and demanded the evidence, and White copped out by declaring it wasn’t his job to tell Brown about her “sins”. In any case racism is a meaningless charge from a man who praised Norbit‘s depiction of Asians and wrote (in his Headless Woman review) that directors in underdeveloped countries have an inferior sense of aesthetics compared with First World filmmakers (and, I assume, film critics).

    Plus it’s pretty rich to liken someone to communists and fascists (COMMIE NAZIS) and then slam Green Zone (and anyone who praises it) for “encouraging insurrection in the American military” — “art must serve the state” being a characteristic doctrine of such regimes. But then self-awareness isn’t one of his strong suits.

Quote Unquotesee all »

It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?

So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.

And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.

There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.

I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.

So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.

But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”

My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher

“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.

~ David Simon