April 26, 2024
Box Office
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It shows how out of it I was in trying to be in it, acknowledging that I was out of it to myself, and then thinking, “Okay, how do I stop being out of it? Well, I get some legitimate illogical narrative ideas” — some novel, you know?
So I decided on three writers that I might be able to option their material and get some producer, or myself as producer, and then get some writer to do a screenplay on it, and maybe make a movie.
And so the three projects were “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep,” “Naked Lunch” and a collection of Bukowski. Which, in 1975, forget it — I mean, that was nuts. Hollywood would not touch any of that, but I was looking for something commercial, and I thought that all of these things were coming.
There would be no Blade Runner if there was no Ray Bradbury. I couldn’t find Philip K. Dick. His agent didn’t even know where he was. And so I gave up.
I was walking down the street and I ran into Bradbury — he directed a play that I was going to do as an actor, so we know each other, but he yelled “hi” — and I’d forgot who he was.
So at my girlfriend Barbara Hershey’s urging — I was with her at that moment — she said, “Talk to him! That guy really wants to talk to you,” and I said “No, fuck him,” and keep walking.
But then I did, and then I realized who it was, and I thought, “Wait, he’s in that realm, maybe he knows Philip K. Dick.” I said, “You know a guy named—” “Yeah, sure — you want his phone number?”
My friend paid my rent for a year while I wrote, because it turned out we couldn’t get a writer. My friends kept on me about, well, if you can’t get a writer, then you write.”
~ Hampton Fancher
“That was the most disappointing thing to me in how this thing was played. Is that I’m on the phone with you now, after all that’s been said, and the fundamental distinction between what James is dealing with in these other cases is not actually brought to the fore. The fundamental difference is that James Franco didn’t seek to use his position to have sex with anyone. There’s not a case of that. He wasn’t using his position or status to try to solicit a sexual favor from anyone. If he had — if that were what the accusation involved — the show would not have gone on. We would have folded up shop and we would have not completed the show. Because then it would have been the same as Harvey Weinstein, or Les Moonves, or any of these cases that are fundamental to this new paradigm. Did you not notice that? Why did you not notice that? Is that not something notable to say, journalistically? Because nobody could find the voice to say it. I’m not just being rhetorical. Why is it that you and the other critics, none of you could find the voice to say, “You know, it’s not this, it’s that”? Because — let me go on and speak further to this. If you go back to the L.A. Times piece, that’s what it lacked. That’s what they were not able to deliver. The one example in the five that involved an issue of a sexual act was between James and a woman he was dating, who he was not working with. There was no professional dynamic in any capacity.
~ David Simon
On one hand I’d be surprised if with all the bad reviews it’s getting, Nightmare opened to more than $30 million. On the other hand, most people don’t check in with critics before they go see what they want to see, and I was initially pleased that Jackie Earle Haley got the Freddy Krueger job, and Transformers 2 made over $400 million domestic.
Hey if the Friday the 13th remake can rake in $40 million its opening weekend, surely A Nightmare on Elm Street can hit $30 million-plus. There’s not much competition this weekend and reviews are irrelevant. Speaking of reviews, it looks like Platinum Dunes produced another piece of shit. Those guys are allergic to good movies.
There’s this little voice in the back of my head telling me that everybody’s underestimating “Furry Vengeance.” I’m probably wrong, but it’s still there.
You’re probably right SJR….kids are all over that crap fest.
And Stella- F13 didn’t rely on a charismatic killer….it’s more of a cool kill/bloody mess kind of thing. People love Robert Englund and when they realize Jackie Earle is Freddy and that the movie lacks that Englund touch, it’ll start to tank badly I think.
Also, “Friday the 13th” opened on an actual ‘Friday the 13th’ which had everybody and their cat flooding into theaters on the Thursday night midnight showings/Friday showings to see it ON ‘Friday the 13th.’ It was like advertised like a one-day, huge event-thing, like if you saw it a week later or whatever, you’d be missing out.
Don, you are so wrong. Nightmare will be big and the lack of England will make no difference.
SJRubinstein, you are right. Furry Vengeance is not to be underestimated.
Just looked it up – “F13” did $19.2 million on opening day, almost a third of its entire domestic box office haul on one day. Then an equally record-type 80.4% drop the following weekend.
I’m not referring to anyone here in particular, but just geeks in general:
1) Doesn’t bashing Platinum Dunes EVER get old? They make a slick product, everyone flocks to it for one weekend, the movies are at least superficially entertaining if lacking the originals’ alleged “depth,” and it’s not like your original beloved TCM or F13 or The Hitcher is OOP or anything. Plus they’re usually LIT WELL and have HOT CHICKS.
2) Other than TCM, how come every time PD does a new remake, it seems like it should logically be a startup to a whole new incarnation of “the series,” but the sequels never materialize? They just scrapped F13 Part 2. Odd… You’d think they’d milk at least a sequel or two out of any of these.
3) Is Samuel Bayer officially the longer wait from music videos to features director EVER? Usually these guys graduate to big movies within a decade or so… This guy’s in his mid-40s and got his break with “Smells Like Teen Spirit.” Just seems weird that a guy whose name is FOREVER IMMORTALIZED IN 1992 MTV MAMA I’M COMIN’ HOME FONT is just now making his first movie.
Maybe MATT MAHURIN can do the sequel.
The reason you don’t get sequels to Platinum Dunes movies is the same reason geeks rag on them.
Bayer’s actually been attached to a lot of stuff through the years, most recently “Black Water Transit” with Sam Jackson and Bruce Willis. No idea why it fell apart (and ended up Tony Kaye, Karl Urban, Laurence Fishburne).
And the anti-Platinum Dunes thing feels like what would’ve happened if the internet had existed in the late fifties/early sixties when Hammer started doing its remakes of “Dracula,” “Mummy,” “Frankenstein,” etc.
“Yeah, Christopher Lee SUCKS (pun intended). Doesn’t hold a candle to Lugosi AND I can’t believe they decided to sell out and shoot the movie in COLOR. I mean, Tod Browning used a little thing called SUBTLETY with his masterpiece, but this Hammer ‘Dracula’ actually shows blood, tits, fangs, everything. And who the hell is Jack Asher? The original ‘Dracula’ had Karl Freund DP’ing who won an Oscar for ‘THE GOOD EARTH,’ for crying out loud. I guess Peter Cushing’s a better Van Helsing than Edward Van Sloan, but BARELY. FUCK Hammer.”
As far as Platinum Dunes goes, they are as hit and miss as any such company. I liked Texas Chainsaw Massace and rather loved Amityville Horror (it was well acted and the characters were sympathetic, so the film was rather scary as a result) and I still say that Texas Chainsaw the Beginning is my favorite TCM in any incarnation (same thing – the characters have interesting back-stories, they are sympathetic, their plight is semi-plausible and you’re never rooting for them to get killed). The Hitcher (with its blank characters and pointless gender reversal) and Friday the 13th (which was actually more boring than a normal F13 sequel) were pretty terrible, and I have yet to see Nightmare. But when they try, when they seemingly attempt to make a good and scary movie, they succeed. We can’t all be Pixar.
Okay, all of your comparisons to Friday the 13th are off because that movie opened on Friday the 13th, ensuring it a huge opening day.
Just like Valentine’s Day did gangbusters on Feb. 14 and The Omen had huge numbers for one day on 6/6/06.
Elm Street won’t have that appeal, but it’ll probably do about as well as any other Platinum Dune movies.
Texas Chainsaw the Beginning was the WORST! Leatherface’s backstory is so much richer now that we know he happened to come upon a chainsaw just sitting there. Now we know he was too lazy to go buy one. Had he happened upon, say, a table saw think how different the legend would be.
Platinum Dunes aren’t the worst, but at best they’re sort of boring. I liked the first Texas Chainsaw okay, and after that,…dullsville.
Also, LexG, you will likely be very disappointed at the unforgiveable lack of gratuitous nudity in Elm Street.
I mean seriously, that’s one aspect of Friday the 13th that Bay and co. had down, but there isn’t ONE boob in this pic.
TCM: THE BEGINNING gets props for casting the two leads via Lexian mathematics.
By which, if you can’t get Jessica Biel or another chick of that rarefied “10 Hottest Women On Earth” level, you double up on two B-listers who put together sort of equal 1 Biel.
So Jordana Brewster plus Diora Baird = JB.
Plus seems like 40 of that movie’s, what, 79 minutes consist of tracking Jordana’s ass from inches away as she prowls around a house on her hands and knees. So if TCM 1 is a rack movie, 2 is an ass movie. Best of both worlds… the two films complement each other like If… and O Lucky Man.
Couldn’t care less about the ‘origins of Leatherface’ stuff, but the movie works as a horror picture, to the point that I forget that it even contains said dumb ‘finding the chainsaw’ moments.
Were there boobs in the original, a_loco? I don’t remember if there were…if so, not too much.
I don’t think Beginnings really works as a horror picture, so to me the dumb moments are DUMB MOMENTS.
The target audience for the A Nightmare on Elm Street remake does not care who plays Freddy. It’ll tank after its first weekend like all horror does.
I suppose PD bashing is tired Lex, but most of their output is incredibly boring. Remakes don’t bother me (especially horror) and I used to be hopeful that PD remakes would at least be entertaining. But their formula is pretty lame.
It’s true, the core audience didn’t grow up on Freddy (the core audience was born in the late eighties), so they don’t have the Robert Englund-thing, but I know I do. With Jason, the mask is the mask – it’s like the Godzilla suit. Your first thought isn’t about who is inside it, though most fans have a fave Jason. With Freddy, it’s night and day. This Freddy looks nothing like the iconic Robert Englund-worn makeup. If forced, I could probably tell the difference – at a distance – between the Karloff, Lugosi, Strange, etc. Universal Frankensteins, though the makeup was very similar. The Lon Chaney, Carradine, Lee and Lugosi Draculas? Different subject altogether.
I don’t think the intended audience cares about Englund vs Haley. And Haley does just fine.
The movie is grueling, though, because it’s the same shit over and shit. Nothing but jump scares. The experience of watching it is unpleasant and not in any way that feels intentional.
I love horror, which is why to me Platinum Dunes kind of sucks. As Eric says, it’s generally jump scare jump scare chase loud noise bang louder noise jump chase. There’s a place for that shit, but Platinum Dunes is just boring.
“Were there boobs in the original, a_loco? I don’t remember if there were…if so, not too much.”
I don’t know, but even if there weren’t, the original made up for it by being…good.
The original Elm St. has a 25 minute dead zone where pretty much nothing happens and Heather Langencamp (who didn’t show her boobs) struggles in vain to carry the thing. Jamie Lee Curtis she aint.
Lex, your 12:39 post tops your H-E Paltrow essay.
They used to call those parts plot and character development!
They should hire Victor Salva to do the remake of Elm St. Part 2.
lex – FTW…actually laughed out loud….
“Iron Man 2” opened yesterday in Mexico. If you’re close to the border and you’re willing to fight the Police State head down to a border town and give us a review.
“If you’re close to the border and you’re willing to fight the Police State”
Wow.
Yeah, I don’t even understand what that means. Are Baja California or Tamaulipas (the only Mexican states I’ve ever been to) police states? or are you thinking of Chihuahua?
To answer Lex’s question: It’s pretty obvious that the Platinum Dunes dudes are really only interested in milking the franchises of money and not in actually adding anything of interest to them (and yes, I don’t understand the lack of sequels, except that I assume they’re insisting on keeping the budgets too high). When a movie’s only justification for existence is ‘it’s just like the old movie, except with MUCH better cinematography’ then that pretty much sucks.
@jeffmcm: US border patrol is becoming more and more militarized. It doesn’t matter if the border crossing is with Mexico or with Canada.
Best to wrap aluminum foil about your head, then.
There’s no current BYOB and NO ONE will care anybody, but…
Anyone else sick of the IRON MAN 2 spots all using those HORRIBLE AC/DC songs? Thunderstruck? Such a horrible song, such a generic band…
I’ve been into metal for 20 years and I know AC/DC is sort of a formative classic rock sacred cow, but I’d be hard-pressed to think of a more homogenized, generic, “square” band.
AC/DC is like rock-n-roll for Republicans. I can totally see like the Big Hollywood crew jamming out to THUNDERSTRUCK or Back in Black, all thinking AC/DC is good conservative bad-ass music. It’s not… it’s just generic and overplayed.
I’m with you Lex. AC/DC is a terrible band and I’m sick of those spots. What’s the joke? AC/DC released the same album 11 times? Something like that and oh so true.
Iron Man 2 isn’t exactly cutting edge cool itself. I love Downey and I’ll see it but isn’t it a generic summer blockbuster that sort of screams out for generic heavy metal music?
And most homogenized and square metal act goes to Kiss by a mile.
KISS was never metal — more like cheap plastic.
Wha–aaat? How can someone worship Fred Durst and call AC/DC generic?
Although it is funny that all of their songs sound the same…but they sound like AC/DC so what can you do? Ramones sounded the same most of their career and I’m down with that too.
AC DC may only ever have addressed humping and booze in their tunes, but I rather listen to them to any of the useless hair bands that followed them and had no clue how to even copy them properly.
AC DC is my favorite sexist guilty pleasure. Back in Black!
Durst doesn’t even have the right to hold Bon Scott’s petrified turds.
ms lota!
how do you feel about brian, lota? he never quite filled bon’s shoes for me
DURST POWER.
Fred Durst is only THE MOST CHARISMATIC ROCK FRONT MAN OF ALL TIME, maybe the most charismatic dude on planet Earth… His awesome BOASTS and rapcore hostility and aggression and INTENSITY and IMMORTAL DUMB-AWESOME LYRICS? There should only be BOWING. Watch those WOODSTOCK 99 clips– NOBODY has ever galvanized a crowd like that. Watch the video for BOILER. THE MAN IS GOD. GOD.
He is THE EVERYTHING I ASPIRE TO BE– balding, aggressive, hostile, rap-metal dude getting MAD VAG and LETTING THE WORLD KNOW. He’s chillaxed some now that he’s older, but in his hey this dude got SO MUCH VAG and he got to hang out with rappers and FINCHER and models and Paris and PAULY SHORE and Sean Penn.
DURST POWER. THE BE-ALL, END-ALL OF LIFE
NOW I KNOW YALL BE LOVIN THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE
L-I-M-P BIZKIT IS RIGHT HERE
HELLZ yes. And as with everything else I LOVE, cracks me up all the CHRISTIAN/McDouche type pussies who are so ABOVE IT ALL and watching from the rafters in life WITH NO INTENSITY and NO APPRECIATION FOR UNLEASHED ID. Which is what BIZKIT is about, which is what PORN is about, what BAY is about, Tony Scott is about, METAL is about, Sasha Grey is about, MEGAN FOX is about, BRIAN AUSTIN GREEN is about.
So is AC/DC motherFUCKER! Did Durst EVER score a movie where inanimate objects destroyed the world? If Durst could get away with wearing a tie and shorts he would, but he knows he doesn’t have the power, dude.
YOU SHOOK ME ALL NIGHT LONG = worst song ever.
You almost make a convincing argument with the shorts and tie angle, but it’s not enough to overcome the utter mundanity of their Republican Rock.
Durst is the biggest whiteboy poser of recent years – which dutifully explains Lex’s fascination.
And until you’ve seen the Scorpions or Iron Maiden or Sabbath live…well, stick to your MTV puss rawk.
I haven’t seen them live because I’m not pushing 50 like you and wasn’t in junior high in 1975 when they were in their heydays with their original lineups… But obviously I’m a fan of all those bands. I saw OZZY on the NO MORE TOURS tour (you know, when he “retired” in 1992.) He played a bunch of Sabbath songs. Does that count?
Besides, you’re just being a pain in the ass, because I frequent your blog, and you certainly aren’t some Venom-Slayer-Maiden-Diamond Head listening rocker; Every music clip you put up is like fucking STRAWBERRY ALARM CLOCK or something else that came out when you were 20.
Lex, you don’t know shit about me. You’re the one who spreads out his whiny emotional viscera to an uncaring world. And since Iron Maiden or the Scorpions, etc weren’t 70’s bands and I still listen to them…Anyway, it’s well known you have horrible music taste. Third Eye Blind? Limp Bizkit? You’re almost 40 and bald. Rock on like it’s 1997.
Why do you deny your age at every turn? You always act like you’re somehow vaguely around my age. You are not. You are 44.
I’m not 44. So why do you pretend to know anything about me besides my blog? It’s creepy. And howz about if I track you down at your work? But see, you don’t have a life. Hence, your impotent rage.
But let me add that I’m flattered that you feel impelled to spend so much time thinking of me. Ain’t love strange?
“I’m not 44.”
Sorry, I meant to type 54. Also, you’re an asshole. Who’s tracking anybody down? What are you TAAAAAAAAAAALKING ABOUT? If I have the age wrong clearly I ain’t tracking too hard and don’t really give a shit. But based on your frame of references, your Greenpeace ethos and personal fashion sense, etc., you can’t be a day under 40. Which is fine, I like plenty of people over 40 (just not women, except for Gabrielle Anwar and leahnz.)
( Maher Voice Activated, imagine his smug face delivering this line: )
But most people over 40? They have JOBS.
Of course you stalk me. You email me. You post on my blog. You assume things about my life. Unlike you, I do the things I dream about while you bully drunk on blogs. You think I’m an asshole? HA. You actually love me because you hate yourself. I understand, Lex. Like a good hippie should.
And to prove you’re not a wuss, I dare you to meet me for a drink so you can compare your fantasy with the reality. If not, then BOW to your master.
Can’t say I’ll do it anytime soon, but, yeah, I’d meet you for a drink. Why not. I do object to you using the loading word “stalk” because I post on your blog– usually about film and nostalgia things and not hostile or even especially provocatively by my standards. Shit, if you hate me posting there about NIGHT SHIFT or whatnot, fine, I’ll stay away. I emailed you, what, once, twice? To complain about Big Hollywood once, and another time to ask your advice on setting up a WordPress blog. Both were courteous and not remotely “bullying.”
And if you ever do meet up with me for a drink, you will find, as Poland and Voynar have, and McWeeny knows, that I’m extremely polite and courteous, gracious, and not remotely a “bully.”
Until I get drunk, then I’m a giant abusive asshole.
Well, your memory is faulty, sport. You’ve posted a few of your pre-teen sex rants, one of which I deleted to which you responded with a further threatening rant. I’m fine with you posting as I don’t ban folks like your bullyhero, Jeff Wells.
But that beggars the question, why would you post on my site or email me if I’m a hippie asshole?
LOVE.
en-zed
Bon was dead before I knew who the AC/DC were…however…in retro listening I would say Bon had the better rock out voice right in sync with the school boy headbanger Angus.
sorry for delay in answering, I was drinking out of a mArgarita pitcher. rock on.
no worries lota, a woman after my own heart. my cousin was into AC/DC growing up, particularly ‘highway to hell’, so the bon era is my stomping ground.
(speaking of margaritas – get yourself a glass woman and class it up! – i’m working my way thru cocktails from movies at the mo, my last go was ‘sweet vermouth on the rocks with a twist’. not so much)
I didn’t know you had a blog, Christian. Would it be alright to post a link or give a name to find it? Lex posted his here but I don’t know either he needed more negative attention or K-Stew to crawl through the interweb line for him to keep it going.
I did like Back in Black very much. A few songs off For Those About to Rock, but after that…nothing at the time stuck w/me.
I took a blind date to see Ozzy back in ’89. I saw him previously in Bark at the Moon tour but he was better the 2nd time. A decade ago the guy couldn’t slur his way through the Natl Anthem, I’d hate to picture him doing a revival show now. Granted he’s a Brit but he couldn’t stay on tune humming.
Maiden I saw maybe 4-5 times during the 80’s/early 90’s, definitely one my all-time favorites but not sure how much I’d drop to see them today. Holy cow, Shakira pre-sale tix started the other day, freckin’ $150 + $17 ticketmaster surcharge. Are you f’ing kidding me?! I couldn’t imagine being in hs and asking the rents for $165 to see anyone. These weren’t even that good of seats. I seriously don’t think I paid over $25 to see a show and that was including throwing in a few bucks tip to the friend of a friend who’d camp out overnight in his car to get them.
re: Leah –
Are you having different cocktails as you watch various movies or are you making cocktails that have been prominently featured in movies? I think I’ve mentioned this before here but the thought of having a drink drink during a movie seems so unappealing to me. I remember getting blitzed and seeing midnight showings of Heavy Metal and They Live in college but that was just an excuse to get drunk.
Anyway, if you
triple: yes, cocktails FROM movies!
a few years back (i think it was drinking white russians one night while watching ‘the big L’ that sparked it) a couple friends and i started this tradition of any cocktail we saw in a movie, old or new, we’d try to sample it, usually when we get together for a few drinks, which we do on a fairly regular basis (one of us a cocktail aficionado so that helps, he’s hilarious). some of the drinks are actually pretty ordinary, there aren’t as many exotic cocktails in movies as you might imagine.
and i actually do have a list (i’m a bit anal, and i’m at home so i’ll copy it for you), the first drink we ever did was the ‘vesper’ from ‘casino royale’ and the rest as follows thus far:
ed wood – martinis (beefeater)
zodiac – hot toddy
the nutty prof – alaska polar bear heater (but that was a bit of a cheat because mr. cocktail watched it specifically so he had the excuse to make the polar bear thing)
the ice harvest – rum and pineapple
shaun of the dead – flaming shots (can’t remember what they were i didn’t write it down)
philadelphia story – stinger
meet the parents – tom collins
jackie brown – screwdriver
north by northwest – gibson
moulin rouge – absinthe
thank you for smoking – mint juleps
saturday night fever – 7 & 7
fletch – bloody mary
my favourite year – cognac (yuck)
the big blue – ouzo
casablanca – champagne cocktails
red eye – bay breeze
godfather II – banana daiquiri
open your eyes – rum and coke
murder on the orient express – creme de menthe
kiss kiss bang bang – jack & soda
and finally, from ‘groundhog day’ the sweet vermouth on the rocks with a twist, it was weird
sorry i see i missed ’28 days later’ which is a creme de menthe double up with ‘orient express’
Thanks, Leah. I’ll have to give these a try. About half I already have. Only a few i’ve never heard of and only a couple of “no way”s.
MOMMY WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK?
LUSHNZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
A PERMANENTLY DRUNK SINGLE MOM.
PUT A RING ON IT, FOAMY.
How did I get dragged in to this?
She has a WETTY for you, dumb ass.
Now post some of that BORING SHIT you specialize in, DOUCHE.
I NEED VAGINA.
I’d rather post some DOUCHE SHIT instead.
first of all, i’ll have you know it’s “mummy why are you always pissed?” christ, this isn’t america.
(and second of all, i am the epitome of a responsible parent and drinker, a time and a place for everything. the worst i ever do is occasionally ding a shin and have some good clean fun. some of us can drink without completely losing our shit)
and on that note: de nada triple, good luck with that. pace yourself. it’s a pretty boring list of cocktails/drinks really
Leah, you missed what I’d consider a crucial one — “scotchka” from THE ROOM. Scotch mixed with vodka, casually, as if this were something people drank every day.
Do you have to mix them casually, or will nonchalantly suffice?
LOU, no one gives a fuck about THE ROOM except you.
Bsd movies = NOT FUNNY.
scotchka? yikes, that’s priceless LYT. i can’t believe someone has finally convinced me to watch ‘the room’
(i’ll be sure to mix the scotchka casually when the moment presents itself — i can’t even imagine what that combo must taste like, i’m sort of gagging a little just thinking about it)